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Best friends dont like the guy I like :/

I'm getting really close to a guy and its quite clear that we like each other, as the days go by we're getting closer and closer. There's one problem though and that is that my two best friends don't like him as much and is weary about me getting close. The main reason for that is because we met through Instagram as stupid as that sounds, so they think he's dodgy. I've spoken to him on the phone, whatsapp, Snapchat and everything. I value their opinion but they're judging him without really getting to know him which I kind of have. They hate me talking about him too :/ What should I do?
Reply 1
It's the guy that you like so you shouldn't care what others think of him. They don't really sound like best friends if they're not supporting you anyway. In my eyes, they seem jealous that you have him and they don't.
Reply 2
Original post by UWS
It's the guy that you like so you shouldn't care what others think of him. They don't really sound like best friends if they're not supporting you anyway. In my eyes, they seem jealous that you have him and they don't.


apparently one of them spoke to him and they got a bad vibe but that's because in the beginning I told him I might stop talking to him because my friends don't like it so he wasn't exactly charming to her, giving her one word answers etc..
I guess they hate you talking about him because this must be the most boring thing out - listening to someone else wax lyrical about heir love interest. Fascinating topic for you ; mind numbing for anyone else.

I'm sure you're right that they don't know him well enough to pass judgment but - do remember that if they still don't like him when they do get to know him better it's just possible that their opinion is more grounded in fact that yours, as your judgment may be less than impartial surrounded as you are in the silvery mists of affection and love.
Most of my friends get very defensive when I talk to guys especially if I decide to meet up with them after talking to them on social media. It is because they are looking out for you and dont want you to end up with someone who will break your heart.

Friends are supposed to be there for you however your friends dont even want to listen to you so I'm not sure whether they are trying to protect you or whether they just dont like this guy in general hence why they dont want to talk about him.
Reply 5
Original post by pickup
I guess they hate you talking about him because this must be the most boring thing out - listening to someone else wax lyrical about heir love interest. Fascinating topic for you ; mind numbing for anyone else.

I'm sure you're right that they don't know him well enough to pass judgment but - do remember that if they still don't like him when they do get to know him better it's just possible that their opinion is more grounded in fact that yours, as your judgment may be less than impartial surrounded as you are in the silvery mists of affection and love.


I don't talk about him much because I'm a private person, they took it upon themselves to stalk him and do their own research which is something we all do for each other lol
Reply 6
Screw them.
It's You Vs them. Never change yourself for the mass.
Reply 7
Am I the "wastewoman" ?
Reply 8
Original post by Applepiex3
Most of my friends get very defensive when I talk to guys especially if I decide to meet up with them after talking to them on social media. It is because they are looking out for you and dont want you to end up with someone who will break your heart.

Friends are supposed to be there for you however your friends dont even want to listen to you so I'm not sure whether they are trying to protect you or whether they just dont like this guy in general hence why they dont want to talk about him.


I completely get where they are coming from, if it was them doing it I would be slightly sceptical too, its only natural. Seeing as its obvious I like the guy and it's going somewhere, they don't want to listen or know anything about it, when I rarely bring it up they just shut him down but I don't say anything back.
1. [QUOTE="Anonymous;67947682"]I don't talk about him much because I'm a private person, they took it upon themselves to stalk him and do their own research which is something we all do for each other lol[/QUOTE
1. ... I don't talk about him much because I'm a private person, they took it upon themselves to stalk him and do their own research which is something we all do for each other lol 2.
Original post by Anonymous
I don't talk about him much because I'm a private person, they took it upon themselves to stalk him and do their own research which is something we all do for each other lol
Stalking and harassment is a crime! Anyone stalking for "fun" is not only pathetic and unbelievably immature, but really needs to get a life rather than getting off on stupid mind games. Don't your friends have any decent feelings or emotional intelligence to stop and think about the anxiety and distress they may be causing the other person they are targeting? Maybe you should tell these so called friends that they would be better off spending their time sorting their own empty and probably mediocre lives out rather than poking their insecure, gossipy noses into other people's business. Honestly: they must be real losers if they need to fill their time this way. They are probably feeling threatened that you actually like someone who is an individual and not a sheep like they seem to be. I think you would be wise to follow your heart, unless you are happier letting people (who don't actually know this person) dictate their sad agenda and seem to enjoy telling you who you can and cannot speak to, who you can and cannot like. What kind of friends wouldn't want another friend to be happy!!!!! They are playing on your weak points (as a group) to try to influence you as they know what to say to get your attention and get you on their side. If you give the person you say you like a chance, you will either find out you have let someone into your life who can make you happy or, and you can share some good times with. If you try with them and it doesn't work out then you can say you tried; but at least you will know you followed your own heart not the voice of people who seem so negative, jealous and ignorant of others. It is sad, but sometimes people we know or friends don't always want what will make us happy, they want whatever keeps them feeling safe and in control of others! You will learn more about yourself and probably get their respect eventually if you stand up to them and see this person you like in the positive way they obviously see you in. Treat this person in a good way, they don't deserve this do they?The truth is they don't like this person because they don't actually know them so are resorting to childish acts, cowardly speculation and wild guessing games to win their arguments as to why you shouldn't like them as well. FOLLOW YOUR HEART AND GIVE THIS PERSON A CHANCE. You owe it to yourself to find someone who you have already told us you like.Believe me, if it doesnt work out for you both you can bet your life on it that those same people will be only too happy to tell you that you messed up, and that "aint" what GOOD orTRUE FREINDSHIP IS REALLY ABOUT! Just think how great it would be if you can prove these losers wrong, and you get a bit of happiness in the bargain too :wink: follow your heart. life is too short to follow the hidden agendas of such shallow, empty people and nasty little schemers.It's your call in the end, but good luck. go for it. Your heart has already trying to tell you something. (not thiers...BUT YOURS!!!); not everyone has a chance to be with someone that they can be happy with, or who loves them back. trust yourself and your heart. you wouldnt have written if at the back of your mind you didn't already know what it is you think is right for you in this situation. good luck,
Original post by Anonymous
I don't talk about him much because I'm a private person, they took it upon themselves to stalk him and do their own research which is something we all do for each other lol


Stalking and harassment is a crime! Anyone stalking for "fun" is not only pathetic and unbelievably immature, but really needs to get a life rather than getting off on stupid mind games. Don't your friends have any decent feelings or emotional intelligence to stop and think about the anxiety and distress they may be causing the other person they are targeting? Maybe you should tell these so called friends that they would be better off spending their time sorting their own empty and probably mediocre lives out rather than poking their insecure, gossipy noses into other people's business. Honestly: they must be real losers if they need to fill their time this way. They are probably feeling threatened that you actually like someone who is an individual and not a sheep like they seem to be. I think you would be wise to follow your heart, unless you are happier letting people (who don't actually know this person) dictate their sad agenda and seem to enjoy telling you who you can and cannot speak to, who you can and cannot like. What kind of friends wouldn't want another friend to be happy!!!!! They are playing on your weak points (as a group) to try to influence you as they know what to say to get your attention and get you on their side. If you give the person you say you like a chance, you will either find out you have let someone into your life who can make you happy or, and you can share some good times with. If you try with them and it doesn't work out then you can say you tried; but at least you will know you followed your own heart not the voice of people who seem so negative, jealous and ignorant of others. It is sad, but sometimes people we know or friends don't always want what will make us happy, they want whatever keeps them feeling safe and in control of others! You will learn more about yourself and probably get their respect eventually if you stand up to them and see this person you like in the positive way they obviously see you in. Treat this person in a good way, they don't deserve this do they?The truth is they don't like this person because they don't actually know them so are resorting to childish acts, cowardly speculation and wild guessing games to win their arguments as to why you shouldn't like them as well. FOLLOW YOUR HEART AND GIVE THIS PERSON A CHANCE. You owe it to yourself to find someone who you have already told us you like.Believe me, if it doesnt work out for you both you can bet your life that those "same idiots" will be only too happy to tell you with so much happiness that you messed up, AND THAAT AINT WHAT GOOD OR TRUE FREINDSHIP IS REALLY ABOUT! Just think how great it would be if you can prove these losers wrong, and you get a bit of happiness in the bargain too :wink: follow your heart. life is too short to follow the hidden agendas of shallow pond-life, idle immature gossips and nasty little schemers.it's your call though. good luck. and go for it. your heart has already trying to tell you something. (not thiers...YOURS!!!) i think you already know though deep down what it is that you would really like to do, when you wrote it to ask for advice. Just remember, not everyone gets the chance to find happiness or to be with a person that loves them back.
(edited 7 years ago)
so? if you like him thats all that matters
Original post by localtrash
Stalking and harassment is a crime! Anyone stalking for "fun" is not only pathetic and unbelievably immature, but really needs to get a life rather than getting off on stupid mind games. Don't your friends have any decent feelings or emotional intelligence to stop and think about the anxiety and distress they may be causing the other person they are targeting? Maybe you should tell these so called friends that they would be better off spending their time sorting their own empty and probably mediocre lives out rather than poking their insecure, gossipy noses into other people's business. Honestly: they must be real losers if they need to fill their time this way. They are probably feeling threatened that you actually like someone who is an individual and not a sheep like they seem to be. I think you would be wise to follow your heart, unless you are happier letting people (who don't actually know this person) dictate their sad agenda and seem to enjoy telling you who you can and cannot speak to, who you can and cannot like. What kind of friends wouldn't want another friend to be happy!!!!! They are playing on your weak points (as a group) to try to influence you as they know what to say to get your attention and get you on their side. If you give the person you say you like a chance, you will either find out you have let someone into your life who can make you happy or, and you can share some good times with. If you try with them and it doesn't work out then you can say you tried; but at least you will know you followed your own heart not the voice of people who seem so negative, jealous and ignorant of others. It is sad, but sometimes people we know or friends don't always want what will make us happy, they want whatever keeps them feeling safe and in control of others! You will learn more about yourself and probably get their respect eventually if you stand up to them and see this person you like in the positive way they obviously see you in. Treat this person in a good way, they don't deserve this do they?The truth is they don't like this person because they don't actually know them so are resorting to childish acts, cowardly speculation and wild guessing games to win their arguments as to why you shouldn't like them as well. FOLLOW YOUR HEART AND GIVE THIS PERSON A CHANCE. You owe it to yourself to find someone who you have already told us you like.Believe me, if it doesnt work out for you both you can bet your life that those "same idiots" will be only too happy to tell you with so much happiness that you messed up, AND THAAT AINT WHAT GOOD OR TRUE FREINDSHIP IS REALLY ABOUT! Just think how great it would be if you can prove these losers wrong, and you get a bit of happiness in the bargain too :wink: follow your heart. life is too short to follow the hidden agendas of shallow pond-life, idle immature gossips and nasty little schemers.it's your call though. good luck. and go for it. your heart has already trying to tell you something. (not thiers...YOURS!!!) i think you already know though deep down what it is that you would really like to do, when you wrote it to ask for advice. Just remember, not everyone gets the chance to find happiness or to be with a person that loves them back.

thank you so much!

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