The Student Room Group

Flatmate heard me having sex? What should I do

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Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes
If you're a bit new here, you will come to understand that TSR has a special kind of hate for muslims, diversity and multiculturalism. It's very odd, in normal everyday life I have genuinely never heard people speak like this (although on some occasions I have, like a teacher who said he would bomb up the whole middle-east and Pakistan...and then looked at me because he though I was Pakistani -__- and he made sure not to say India because I'm Indian -_-).

Most people wouldn't say half the **** they do if it wasn't for the fact they can say is from behind a computer screen.


I guess you must live in a city. Go to towns that aren't diverse or ones that have de facto segregation and a lot of people talk openly like this. TSR is quite mild in comparison.
Original post by TheonlyMrsHolmes
I would say your wrong. The only reason it seems PC to you is because all the really controversial stuff gets taken down.

Yes the older demographic is more racist, I'm not arguing that but I was actually talking about the younger generation.


Well I don't think that is true anyway.

Remember you are only really talking to relatively educated people in real life (I assume anyway) - I doubt you talk to the uneducated youths I do when working security events, to be blunt the chavs. Or the plumbers, brick-layers and proper working class lads I work with on construction sites and ****, just near where I live...

TSR is tame in comparison. That is my solemn belief.
Original post by TSR Mustafa
Lol 'only 3 times'


LOL. Of the boys living in halls, 80% of the guys reactions right now...

































































Original post by redbronze1
LOL. Of the boys living in halls, 80% of the guys reactions right now...



































































Hahaha nah we usually go to his which was my point!
I would say that its not that big problem. What she told is the to inform her before hand about it. If your plans are uncertain or on the spot for having sex than you have to bit aware and ready and also to make less noise while having sex. But its better to have it preplanned.
Unless you are replicating a John Cena match at 4am during sex, what you do in your bed is not her business.Suggest her to leave if this is a problem for her, nobody should complain about personal business of the flatmates.
Shes telling you how to behave based on her worldview? She doesn't belong in the university community which is based on the academic principles of freedom of speech and freedom of thought.

Your room- your rules. She can do one.

Suggest earplugs, or music headphones. Or, if like me, you are outraged by her dogmatism and her infringement on your basic biological impulses and freedom as an individual, I'd keep enjoying yourself while you still can :wink:
It's all part of student life, of course if you were banging on the walls and screaming I would understand why she would be annoyed and uncomfortable but moving in to halls you sign up to experience the student life and this is what comes with it. I have my boyfriend over all the time in my halls and we do it too, no one is bothered by it because everyone is doing it so it's nothing really to make a fuss about
Do the decent thing and move out
She's just way too jealous that she isn't getting any. Perhaps ask I her to tell you every time she chooses to play with herself. What you do in your room is your own business. She should realise she can't control people and she would be better off if she just lived by herself.
Reply 190
Original post by daniellee0
I've had sex only around 3 times since I moved into halls a few months ago. She's told me she's heard me have sex (awkward) I understand it obviously won't have been pleasant for her but I also want to feel comfortable in the flat as much as she does. I mean it's not as if I do it every night...

She's quite funny about any of our flat mates having boys over, she said that we have to tell her before we have any male over because she wears a headscarf which is fair enough but she won't give us her number or Facebook etc for us to tell her beforehand. She's in her room 90% of the time so I don't really know what to do.

Anyone had this problem with flat mates hearing you have sex?


Oh jeez that is a tricky one. I was just gonna say 'lol that's uni for you' but I guess it's bothering her and there's obviously the cultural side to it.

Firstly I'd try to talk to her and explain that you have to be able to contact her quickly via facebook or phone or something if you are having guys over. I understand her reasons for needing to know, but she seems to be making it a bit difficult for you.

As for the sex I guess you just have to try and keep the noise down. Maybe turn the shower on or some music!

Also more generally I'd suggest trying to socialise with her more. If she's in her room 90% of the time [these kinds of flatmates are so difficult lol] then that's tricky but if you can successfully bond with her a bit then she's much more likely to be understanding and open and probably you will be of her as well.

Hope this helps
Reply 191
Original post by Snazzyzebra
Shes telling you how to behave based on her worldview? She doesn't belong in the university community which is based on the academic principles of freedom of speech and freedom of thought.

Your room- your rules. She can do one.

Suggest earplugs, or music headphones. Or, if like me, you are outraged by her dogmatism and her infringement on your basic biological impulses and freedom as an individual, I'd keep enjoying yourself while you still can :wink:


Your freedom to do something shouldn't infringe on someone's freedom from something. THAT is the academic principle which is (wonderfully) celebrated and promtoed at university. If the noise is going into her room then 'your room your rules' does not apply. But I'm sure you know all this being the academic principles expert that you seem to be.

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