The Student Room Group

Help! My parents are refusing to help financialLy if I go to London unis :'(

Hello,

I've recently been discussing (/arguing about) my uni decisions with my parents and while I really want to study in London, they don't want me to because of the cost. Unfortunately, because my mother is a nurse our household income falls above the means tested amount so to my knowledge I will get the minimal means tested bursary/loan ting of £3000 something a year. Is this enough for living per year in London. ( to include everything but tuition fees)?

My oarents also say going to London will be really irresponsible and the conversation ended with them saying they won't help me out financially if I go to London. Now I am sure this is just trying to persuade me not to apply, but even so while we fall above the household income, they don't have much money to help me anyway so I wanted to know if there were any other bursaries/help I could apply for as I don't think six years in London (Medicine) is going to be possible otherwise :frown:

Aspiring

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Reply 1
If you study in London you're able to apply for a higher maintenance loan - upto around £7000 a year, if I remember correctly :smile:.
Reply 2
You get a larger maintenance for London (between £5000-£7000 depending on how much you get as a grant).

You could ask them how much they would be willing to give you each month if you studied outside of London, then just ask them to give you that much if you study inside London. That way they are no worse off regardless of where you go.

Other than that, you'll have to find ways to make your money go as far as possible by budgeting well. Maybe try and get jobs over the summer? (easier said than done I know)
Reply 3
Original post by Natalie21
If you study in London you're able to apply for a higher maintenance loan - upto around £7000 a year, if I remember correctly :smile:.


Which the OP isn't going to get if their parent earns above the threshold.

It is a pretty ****ty system, because it assumes that just because your parents technically should be able to support you through university, that they therefore will.
Reply 4
Have you considered that it isn't that they don't want to support you financially when studying in London, but they are unable to?

You've said yourself that they don't have much spare money - maybe they don't want you to go to London and scrape by, when you could live comfortably elsewhere?

Besides, why should your parents support you financially? It's nice that they can, but they don't HAVE to. So to be honest, stop being so selfish and ungrateful.
Reply 5
Original post by limetang
Which the OP isn't going to get if their parent earns above the threshold.

It is a pretty ****ty system, because it assumes that just because your parents technically should be able to support you through university, that they therefore will.


They just won't be able to get a grant. They will still be able to get a higher loan of £5000 ish.
Reply 6
Original post by hvh
Besides, why should your parents support you financially? It's nice that they can, but they don't HAVE to. So to be honest, stop being so selfish and ungrateful.


I'm pretty sure that student finances expect the parents to contribute a certain amount (which is really lame, especially if your parents can't afford it).
Reply 7
You can cut off contact with your parents and claim to be estranged. It's a hassle but then you won't be assessed on their income.

Up to you if you think that's worth it.


Original post by Dorkins
I'm pretty sure that student finances expect the parents to contribute a certain amount (which is really lame, especially if your parents can't afford it).


They rate assistance so that parents can afford it. They might choose to spend it on other things, which is another issue entirely.

I can't imagine not helping my kid when I have one; I'd give up plenty of comfort to do so. Maybe that's just because mine don't help at all though :tongue:

Assuming parental contribution is perhaps annoying but I'm not sure of a better way that wouldn't be open to abuse.
(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 8
Original post by Natalie21
They just won't be able to get a grant. They will still be able to get a higher loan of £5000 ish.


£5000 in London? For a year? Get real. There's not a chance in hell that you'll be able to live off that.

It's unlikely that that will pay for your accommodation. And before you say get a job. Some courses do not allow for that in the timetabling, and sometimes there are just no part time jobs available.
(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 9
Original post by mimx
You can cut off contact with your parents and claim to be estranged. It's a hassle but then you won't be assessed on their income.

Up to you if you think that's worth it.




They rate assistance so that parents can afford it. They might choose to spend it on other things, which is another issue entirely.

I can't imagine not helping my kid when I have one; I'd give up plenty of comfort to do so. Maybe that's just because mine don't help at all though :tongue:

Assuming parental contribution is perhaps annoying but I'm not sure of a better way that wouldn't be open to abuse.


I imagine the OP lives with his parents and relies on them for food and water- so that's a non starter really isn't it?

OP- why do you want to go to London so badly? I love it myself- but I would never live there in a million years. Far too expensive.

I had a friend who was on a internship this summer and stayed in Forrest Hill (hardly your Kensington and Chelsea) and it cost her £800PCM incl of all bills- £200 a week. On top of that you have to find money for travel, food and socializing. If you lived there for 52 weeks of the year- it's more than £10,000.

Travel is ridicilious- last trip I went from Euston to Victoria and cost me £4.20 for the privilege (I know that for a fact because I had exactly £5 on my Oyster before I went and there was 80p on it when I couldn't get through the barrier on my next journey) Unless you stay in halls (and even they are silly expensive) you won't be able to afford anything near central- meaning over £100 commuting in and out each month.

If the loan is £5,000- it's not even going to make a dent. You will either have to flog your backside off in your free time or get into serious debts with credit cards and overdrafts.

Why not go to university elsewhere- and when you graduated and earning your own money you can live where you please.

Unfortunately, if you expect your parents to put their hands in their pockets- you have to respect their decisions.

Don't like it? Stand on your own two feet.
Reply 10
Original post by iammarmite
I imagine the OP lives with his parents and relies on them for food and water- so that's a non starter really isn't it?


He wants to leave home to go to London, at which point his parents will apparently cut off all support. It's harder to declare estrangement if you were supported by them up until leaving for uni, but if he can prove this is some kind of irreconcilable difference and that he won't be being supported by them then he could still be treated as such.

If you mean London will only be a term address then getting a job during uni breaks and staying there is up to him.
Reply 11
Original post by mimx
He wants to leave home to go to London, at which point his parents will apparently cut off all support. It's harder to declare estrangement if you were supported by them up until leaving for uni, but if he can prove this is some kind of irreconcilable difference and that he won't be being supported by them then he could still be treated as such.

If you mean London will only be a term address then getting a job during uni breaks and staying there is up to him.


aspiringgenius, this is a bit of a silly thread. To pay for your living costs, you are given a maintenance loan, the maximum size of which depends on the area you live, and that loan is on top of the tuition fee loan. You don't rely on a bursary for all of it. Bursaries don't need to be paid back. A maintenance loan is part of the student loan and is paid back.

Many people go to university with no financial help from their parents, you'd be in a very fortunate position if your parents were contributing.
(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 12
have you actually had a sensible conversation with your parents where you havent demanded that you go to London?
Have you ever had a job? or done paid work?
Because this sounds like a petty argument from a teenager to his parents. Get some actual work sho you can support yourself a bit and show your parents you can help with your own university costs and not just use their hrd earned money. Don't say A levels take up all your time as i workd 20 hours a week throughout my A levels and 30 hours a week for the first 2 years of university on a very busy schedule (night shifts... wooo).
Reply 13
Original post by Dorkins
I'm pretty sure that student finances expect the parents to contribute a certain amount (which is really lame, especially if your parents can't afford it).


I'm fully aware student finance expects parents to contribute - but that doesn't mean that they can or are willing to. The system doesn't fairly assess affordability - it doesn't consider how many children are in the household, bills that are going out each month ect - it bases it purely on income.

My point to the OP is to be grateful that his/her parents are both able and willing as there are a lot of parents that aren't.
Original post by hvh

Besides, why should your parents support you financially? It's nice that they can, but they don't HAVE to. So to be honest, stop being so selfish and ungrateful.


Sounds like someone has unloving parents...
Original post by AspiringGenius
Hello,

I've recently been discussing (/arguing about) my uni decisions with my parents and while I really want to study in London, they don't want me to because of the cost. Unfortunately, because my mother is a nurse our household income falls above the means tested amount so to my knowledge I will get the minimal means tested bursary/loan ting of £3000 something a year. Is this enough for living per year in London. ( to include everything but tuition fees)?

My oarents also say going to London will be really irresponsible and the conversation ended with them saying they won't help me out financially if I go to London. Now I am sure this is just trying to persuade me not to apply, but even so while we fall above the household income, they don't have much money to help me anyway so I wanted to know if there were any other bursaries/help I could apply for as I don't think six years in London (Medicine) is going to be possible otherwise :frown:

Aspiring


You are assuming you will get into a London medical school - from what I can see this is not a given. Since medicine seems to be one of the most competitive courses it is a bit of a lucky/unlucky dip.

My son is at Bristol and my daughter is in UCL - to be honest the Bristol cost of living is higher. We also looked at Birmingham - and they were even higher in the first year.

Why do you want to go to London - is it the social scene - because you would get the same in other big cities - Manchester is great as is Nottingham. I can't speak for other big places, but I have a friend whose daughter is in Glasgow and is having a great time.

Parents often make a big sacrifice to help their children through university. You should not impoverish them because of your wants
Original post by iammarmite
I imagine the OP lives with his parents and relies on them for food and water- so that's a non starter really isn't it?

OP- why do you want to go to London so badly? I love it myself- but I would never live there in a million years. Far too expensive.

I had a friend who was on a internship this summer and stayed in Forrest Hill (hardly your Kensington and Chelsea) and it cost her £800PCM incl of all bills- £200 a week. On top of that you have to find money for travel, food and socializing. If you lived there for 52 weeks of the year- it's more than £10,000.

Travel is ridicilious- last trip I went from Euston to Victoria and cost me £4.20 for the privilege (I know that for a fact because I had exactly £5 on my Oyster before I went and there was 80p on it when I couldn't get through the barrier on my next journey) Unless you stay in halls (and even they are silly expensive) you won't be able to afford anything near central- meaning over £100 commuting in and out each month.

If the loan is £5,000- it's not even going to make a dent. You will either have to flog your backside off in your free time or get into serious debts with credit cards and overdrafts.

Why not go to university elsewhere- and when you graduated and earning your own money you can live where you please.

Unfortunately, if you expect your parents to put their hands in their pockets- you have to respect their decisions.

Don't like it? Stand on your own two feet.


I think your points are a bit unfair! Firstly, it sounds like you travelled at peak times to have £4.20 taken off your Oyster. You can also have your 16-25 railcard loaded on to your Oyster to receive 34% off. Secondly, yes, accommodation can be £200 a week if you're unlucky or frankly a bit stupid, but the University of London has its own housing service that regularly advertises rooms from £85 a week. I'm studying in London now, and if you're sensible with budgeting, shop in a big Tesco and not an express, and do little things like take your own coffee in a flask, you can live on about £50 a week.
Reply 17
Original post by AspiringGenius
Hello,

I've recently been discussing (/arguing about) my uni decisions with my parents and while I really want to study in London, they don't want me to because of the cost. Unfortunately, because my mother is a nurse our household income falls above the means tested amount so to my knowledge I will get the minimal means tested bursary/loan ting of £3000 something a year. Is this enough for living per year in London. ( to include everything but tuition fees)?

My oarents also say going to London will be really irresponsible and the conversation ended with them saying they won't help me out financially if I go to London. Now I am sure this is just trying to persuade me not to apply, but even so while we fall above the household income, they don't have much money to help me anyway so I wanted to know if there were any other bursaries/help I could apply for as I don't think six years in London (Medicine) is going to be possible otherwise :frown:

Aspiring


If maintenance loan is literally your only source of income, its not just London unis that will be a problem. Your typical uni accommodation will not be covered by the £3500 maintenance loan, let alone money for food etc. The loans system is based on the assumption the parents will contribute. That is most evident in London, but not limited to it by any means.

At this point TSR tends to hit posters with a volley of 'get a job', which isn't quite as easy as that these days but does look like your best option to at least look into at this point.
Original post by mimx
You can cut off contact with your parents and claim to be estranged. It's a hassle but then you won't be assessed on their income.

Up to you if you think that's worth it.


Do NOT take this person's advice.

I was genuinely estranged from my parents and I had a very difficult time trying to prove it. I almost had to give up uni because of it.
Reply 19
Original post by hvh
Besides, why should your parents support you financially? It's nice that they can, but they don't HAVE to. So to be honest, stop being so selfish and ungrateful.

Is this really true for the UK?

Because in Austria parents have to support their children by LAW up until a certain age. If they do not, you are able to sue them.

Though the practical execution of this is more than questionable (ie who would sue their parents?).

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