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TSR Iraqi Society

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Original post by >Anna<
What?

they're the jews of iraq,

which is a bit odd, because it would seem to me that the jews of iraq would be the jews of iraq....
Original post by >Anna<
What?


Stingy! If I remember correctly, there are 3 types of Iraqi jokes... Maslawi = Stingy, Kurd = Stupid and Nassriyah = Khabatha (Malignancy). It's just harmless fun (my mum laughs...then gets offended), khabatha jokes are my personal favourite. :ninja:

Death Row:

One night before an Iraqi and a Saudi were to be executed, the executioner came and asked them about their last wishes:

The Saudi's wish was, "I wanna see my kids one last time"

The Iraqi's wish was, "I don't want the Saudi to see his kids"

Man from Saudi Arabia: OWNED
The Executioner: Rushes to look up the word, "KHABATHA"

Shlon legend. :surprise:
Original post by Dirac Delta Function
they're the jews of iraq,

which is a bit odd, because it would seem to me that the jews of iraq would be the jews of iraq....


Original post by Sushidelight
Stingy! If I remember correctly, there are 3 types of Iraqi jokes... Maslawi = Stingy, Kurd = Stupid and Nassriyah = Khabatha (Malignancy). It's just harmless fun (my mum laughs...then gets offended), khabatha jokes are my personal favourite. :ninja:

Death Row:

One night before an Iraqi and a Saudi were to be executed, the executioner came and asked them about their last wishes:

The Saudi's wish was, &quot;I wanna see my kids one last time&quot;

The Iraqi's wish was, &quot;I don't want the Saudi to see his kids&quot;

Man from Saudi Arabia: OWNED
The Executioner: Rushes to look up the word, &quot;KHABATHA&quot;

Shlon legend. :surprise:


Haha, I hadn't heard that before. I will have to tease my dad :colone:
Original post by Dirac Delta Function
you know what they say about maslawis :biggrin:


Hahaha... once my idiot relative, met this woman who was Iraqi Jewish woman from Mousil, she couldn't hold it in... "Lak sodig chithib! Oh my God. Maslawi AND Jewish? Noooo way! Your level of stingyness must be walla off the rader. Swear down!" --- I had to apologise on her behalf for 3 weeks and I don’t think she will ever visit our home again, “too busy”. :ninja:

Iraqi khabatha joko time...

A Frenchman, a Englishman and an Iraqi were captured by a tribe whose chief decreed to kill all three men.

He came to them and said that he would kill all three of them and use their skin to build a canoe. The tribe chief went on to say that he would let the men decide how they wanted to be killed.

The Frecnhmen chose poison, he drank it and instantly died.

The Englishman asked for a pistol, he was handed one, he shot himself in the head and died.

The Iraqi asked for a fork, they brought him a fork, he started stabbing himself in the stomach, chest, sides while blood gushed out of his body. The tribe chief, puzzled, asked the Iraqi why he was killing himself in such a painful way, the Iraqi responded by saing, "khara beek u bil canoe maltak."

Carpenter building the canoe: OWNED.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An Iraqi man and his friend were walking down the street one night when suddenly, a genie popped out of nowhere, it asked the Iraqi to make a wish and not only would his wish come true, but the genie vowed to double that for his friend.

For example, if the Iraqi asks for $1 million, the genie would give him the million and his friend 2 million.

The Iraqi thought for less than one minute and said to the genie, "take out one of my eyes."

The Friend: OWNED.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An Iraqi was appointed director of an orphanage, among the first tasks on his agenda was to tell the kids that he wanted to hold a meeting for their parents.

The Children: OWNED.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An Iraqi theif entered a house, to his disappointment, he found nothing to steal, he picked up the phone, called a random music number in China and put the receiver on the side.

The thief: SATISFIED
Owner of the house: Well, OWNED

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

An Iraqi man died and went to heaven, he locked the door behind him.

All living believers: OWNED

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A man from that special province was walking by the sea when he saw a drowning man, thrilled by the incident, he called all his relatives, gave them wrong directions and watched the drowning man.

The drowning man: OWNED
Relatives: Sad that they missed the opportunity to watch
The man from the special province: <<holding 2 fingers>> for two acts of KHABATHA!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

During the Iraq/Iran war, a soldier from the special province would send letters to mothers of his fellow soldiers telling them that their sons had been killed in the frontlines.

Mothers: OWNED
The province in its entirety: Happy

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Someone from the special province called the local radio show to request a happy song, he dedicated it to his friend on the occasion of the death of his mother.

The Friend: OWNED
The caller: Thrilled

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

During the Iraq/Iran war, a man from al-Nasiriyyah would write banners on his neighbours' houses saying, "The Headquarters of al-Da3wa Party."

The Neighbours: OWNED


.... :biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:
Original post by >Anna<
Haha, I hadn't heard that before. I will have to tease my dad :colone:


I will translate the ones I know and help you out in this quest... khabatha. :biggrin:

There was a Maslawi who entered heaven, he was given 3 houses, he rented them out and went to live in hell.

A Maslawi decided to write and produce a heartbreaking movie
what did he call it?
"I lost my wallet."

Who do you know you're flying on Maslawi airlines? You have to bring your own food.

I will ask my parents for more...
(edited 13 years ago)
Original post by Sushidelight
I will translate the ones I know and help you out in this quest... khabatha. :biggrin:

There was a Maslawi who entered heaven, he was given 3 houses, he rented them out and went to live in hell.

A Maslawi decided to write and produce a heartbreaking movie
what did he call it?
&quot;I lost my wallet.&quot;

Who do you know you're flying on Maslawi airlines? You have to bring your own food.

I will ask my parents for more...



:rofl: Thank you! The second one actually made me laugh out loud :p:

I'm going to tell my dad these later :biggrin:


Also, love your signature, hate your post in the thread about women shaving their legs (:yucky:).
Original post by >Anna<


Also, love your signature, hate your post in the thread about women shaving their legs (:yucky:).


Thank you haha.

Ugh. The photo is so fugly....but may have encouraged TSR-ians to remove hair.
Reply 127
Avatar for mare?
mare?
11
Original post by FiveFiveSix
.

Impressive pics!! Thanks for sharing

haha NICE! :smile:

Original post by Whatever9999
i went der for 2 weeks ,,we made this big familyy and neighbours trip b4 the war and we went to mousul by bus it was the most amazzinggg trip everrr !!! i have some pics


share share! (rest of you guys too!) I'd love to see pictures
Reply 128
Avatar for mare?
mare?
11
These were made in Basra last November (sadly, not by me)





(Badr shaker al sayyab ...and one of my little cousins :smile:)

(Shatt al arab)
ok, not an iraq-related thing, but we can be "off topic" yes?

What do you guys think of this? Catchy and innovative or drawing a moustache on the Mona Lisa?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zn70QSetC_E&feature=related
Original post by Sushidelight
Thank you haha.

Ugh. The photo is so fugly....but may have encouraged TSR-ians to remove hair.


I shared those Maslawi jokes with my dad and he loved them :p:
Original post by >Anna<
I shared those Maslawi jokes with my dad and he loved them :p:


They are not jokes, they are nukat. :slap:
Original post by win2kpro
They are not jokes, they are nukat. :slap:


Nukat?
Original post by >Anna<
Nukat?


http://www.proz.com/kudoz/arabic_to_english/religion/1822734-nukat.html

:sigh:

:getmecoat:
Original post by >Anna<
Nukat?

jokes
Original post by win2kpro



Original post by Dirac Delta Function
jokes



I'm sorry, I don't speak Arabic.
I was never taught :nopity:
Original post by >Anna<
I'm sorry, I don't speak Arabic.
I was never taught :nopity:


That is no excuse. :colonhash:

Come back when you become fluent in Arabic. :colone:
Original post by >Anna<
I'm sorry, I don't speak Arabic.
I was never taught :nopity:


:console: it's ok, we'll teach you every obscenity you'll ever need, and some that you won't
Original post by >Anna<
I'm sorry, I don't speak Arabic.
I was never taught :nopity:


That's disgraceful. :angry:

(I'm not one to talk tbh, I mix Arabic and English all the time when I speak... :biggrin:)
Original post by win2kpro
That is no excuse. :colonhash:

Come back when you become fluent in Arabic. :colone:


:puppyeyes:

Why...what happens when I'm fluet? :holmes:


Original post by Dirac Delta Function
:console: it's ok, we'll teach you every obscenity you'll ever need, and some that you won't


Ex-cellent :colone:

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