So my ex boyfriend turned out to be a complete jerk- a liar, a cheat and just completely evil. Completely.
Then a new guy I met was all ''i really like you i just dont want a relationship''. After months of messing me around ''i wanna be with you'' ''i dont wanna be with you'' and me being the doormat he was walking all over, we finally agreed on being just friends. Doesnt stop him dating and then rubbing everything in my face, how hes potentially got this new girlfriend and how he really likes her. Lovely.
Then I meet another guy and we agreed to be friends with benefits. Im not in any way emotionally attached to him, except now he doesnt even bother talking to me. Well, whatever.
Then i went on a date with another guy- turns out he just wanted a **** buddy. Bye bye.
Then another guy. He always makes me do jobs for him, even when i was really ill he was like ''do this do that''. I spent hours doing something for him then he didnt even say thank you. He just talks to me when he wants something.
Then finally, I went on a date with an actual nice guy! He wasnt just after sex, he was a gentleman and a kind guy! But guess what? He didnt like me, didnt get back to me, so i just deleted his number.
All this in just a few months, so now im thinking all guys are scum. I know i shouldnt be thinking like this, but it really does seem like all guys are just after sex. Im the sort of girl that is 'relationship material'- im kind, caring, really helpful, loyal and totally committed. Im still a virgin, and it seems all the guys im meeting just want to get straight in my pants!
So ive just been thinking, why should i care about guys? Why dont i just play them all off each other like they do to me? Why dont i just mess everyone around and hurt everyone and use guys for my own pleasure when i want something?
More recently, im actually finding it difficult to have feelings for any guy. Even the guy that i was crazy about has been texting me about this 'new girl' even after everything he told me about liking me and not wanting a girlfriend, and i KNOW hes saying it to hurt me- but im not phased. Its like my heart has gone numb to everything.
Is this normal?