The Student Room Group

No friends, no life..........

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Original post by student0210
I would join chatiry work around here etc but it seems where i live the only other volunteers are very old people so im not ageist or anything but i cant really see myself being friends with them


Well you can call the organisers of these activities to see whether there are young volunteers. I dont think volunteers are always older people, at least it is not true in my place. But if its true and you just want to stay in one place then things may be harder. But you can always search for some activities that only require two people to join such as traveling. There are so many people seeking a partner on websites. Maybe not traveling but some other things you just find out yourself.

Out of interest, I don't think being along is a bad thing. If you keep being an onlooker you can see things clearer. Many writers are like this kind and maybe you can join them:wink: Maybe you should think about why you need friends seriously. If you can function well without friends then just don't worry.
Original post by student0210
lol. being a nerd doesn't make me brainy only one subject on a levels i was good at really well possibly two the others i only got D's in how did i get into uni, you tell me.....

and the problem is making these friends :frown:


i don't think your a nerd at all. A nerd is someone who cares about grades more than friends and other stuff and people who don't try to socialise with other people.

On the other hand your at least trying to make friends and you must be kind because there examples that your are such as helping teacher to clear up (is that what u said on your first post?). I do that too and i thank my teachers for every lesson and everytime they help me with something.

Even though i spent 3 months doing revision and making a big change from a few marks off a U in AS to getting high A's i wasn't stated as a nerd because i was working for my future. If anyone calls you that just think "i'm working for my future and your not so what your saying is crap" People so say that just do it because they think cool is "taking the mick outta people who try"

With friends, don't try to find them at all. Just do your normal day to day stuff. Eventually you'll meet new people randomly.

Because u said you were boring people may have a poor impression of you. The only way to find friends is to meet new people and give a good first impression. I don't understand why you have the issue of having "no friends" you seem like a good person and your willing to build new bridges with people but you can't because of your lack of skills in communication (due to your past?)
(edited 11 years ago)
Original post by student0210
Ive tried both of these already and they just didn't work out at all


give me examples of what you've set yourself/did?
Reply 23
Original post by BigLampshade
Well next time you all go out, make sure to go with them out to the bar or something. Chances are they were wondering where you disappeared to, because you didn't go with them. Trust me, me and most of my friends are like donkeys following a suspended carrot. We follow pretty much one person wherever.


Didmt quite happen like that lol. we spent the day working then they went out at night im not with this group anymore now anyway. we we rarely even see each other
Reply 24
Original post by sensingdevice
Well you can call the organisers of these activities to see whether there are young volunteers. I dont think volunteers are always older people, at least it is not true in my place. But if its true and you just want to stay in one place then things may be harder. But you can always search for some activities that only require two people to join such as traveling. There are so many people seeking a partner on websites. Maybe not traveling but some other things you just find out yourself.

Out of interest, I don't think being along is a bad thing. If you keep being an onlooker you can see things clearer. Many writers are like this kind and maybe you can join them:wink: Maybe you should think about why you need friends seriously. If you can function well without friends then just don't worry.


Ill have a look abouts and keep and eye out . And i want friends so i am not stuck in my room 24/7 apart from lecturer i want to go out bowling or to the cinemas or just something even if it is camping for the weekend
Reply 25
Original post by Setsuna-F-Seiei
i don't think your a nerd at all. A nerd is someone who cares about grades more than friends and other stuff and people who don't try to socialise with other people.

On the other hand your at least trying to make friends and you must be kind because there examples that your are such as helping teacher to clear up (is that what u said on your first post?). I do that too and i thank my teachers for every lesson and everytime they help me with something.

Even though i spent 3 months doing revision and making a big change from a few marks off a U in AS to getting high A's i wasn't stated as a nerd because i was working for my future. If anyone calls you that just think "i'm working for my future and your not so what your saying is crap" People so say that just do it because they think cool is "taking the mick outta people who try"


With friends, don't try to find them at all. Just do your normal day to day stuff. Eventually you'll meet new people randomly.

Because u said you were boring people may have a poor impression of you. The only way to find friends is to meet new people and give a good first impression. I don't understand why you have the issue of having "no friends" you seem like a good person and your willing to build new bridges with people but you can't because of your lack of skills in communication (due to your past?)


During high school etc i was very much like grades did come first and foremost. And yes people have said im kind caring and a nice person to go and speak to problems about but people don't think about that or people were lieing to me lol.

I just dont like being alone i want to chat to someone i want to go out to the cinema and enjoy myself etc. and quite posisbly it was due to my past. I moved primary schools and towns from a very young age probably about 6 and i do think this affected me, and it was also when bulling did take a massive toll in my life. there were many years i coudnt escape a break time without being bullied and so obviously nobody wanted to hang around with a looser who got bullied.
Reply 26
Original post by internet tough guy
give me examples of what you've set yourself/did?


I said right il go out for a walk there il try and do something active in my room there, il to the library at that time and do some readin il go and prepare that essay at that time etc
Original post by student0210
Ill have a look abouts and keep and eye out . And i want friends so i am not stuck in my room 24/7 apart from lecturer i want to go out bowling or to the cinemas or just something even if it is camping for the weekend

Im not quite familiar with situations in your country but for me, I'll keep an eye on latest movies or activities and invite others to join. You can be proactive in organasing things so that you can talk about informations of these things:smile:
In China we have group purchasing websites(things are much cheaper there)so we usually buy things and watch movies in group. I think you should have same things and there is a reason to be together, you know, cheap prices.
Reply 28
Original post by sensingdevice
Im not quite familiar with situations in your country but for me, I'll keep an eye on latest movies or activities and invite others to join. You can be proactive in organasing things so that you can talk about informations of these things:smile:
In China we have group purchasing websites(things are much cheaper there)so we usually buy things and watch movies in group. I think you should have same things and there is a reason to be together, you know, cheap prices.


Ive tried this a fair few times before and every single time flawed and noone was interested, No idea if the Uk has a site like that to be honest
Original post by student0210
Ive tried this a fair few times before and every single time flawed and noone was interested, No idea if the Uk has a site like that to be honest

Or maybe you can ask a girl in your class. Tell her about your feelings and see whether she wants to help. She may be willing to help due to her motherly instinct just like me.
Reply 30
Original post by sensingdevice
Or maybe you can ask a girl in your class. Tell her about your feelings and see whether she wants to help. She may be willing to help due to her motherly instinct just like me.


Definite no no they girls on my course are all one massive group and love to gossip and "bit@h about people someone spread a rumour about me the other day the joy
Original post by student0210
Definite no no they girls on my course are all one massive group and love to gossip and "bit@h about people someone spread a rumour about me the other day the joy

So terrible and immature. We will never do that no matter who the person is. I start to feel that there is nothing wrong with your personalities but theirs.
Well you definitely can find sb nice enough to help you. But if you have already tried almost every method and end up nothing why not keep a pet? After that you can communicate with other pet keepers. People will talk if they are interested in your topic.
Reply 32
Original post by sensingdevice
So terrible and immature. We will never do that no matter who the person is. I start to feel that there is nothing wrong with your personalities but theirs.
Well you definitely can find sb nice enough to help you. But if you have already tried almost every method and end up nothing why not keep a pet? After that you can communicate with other pet keepers. People will talk if they are interested in your topic.


Im a student were not aloud them in the majority of student accocmadadtion if we were i would of loved a little dog
Reply 33
Original post by student0210
Definite no no they girls on my course are all one massive group and love to gossip and "bit@h about people someone spread a rumour about me the other day the joy


Find some you are interested in and join a club for it. Even if you don't like it stick with it and you will make friends. You say your a nerd - maybe something like a computer or board games club or the like.
Reply 34
Original post by Matty919
Find some you are interested in and join a club for it. Even if you don't like it stick with it and you will make friends. You say your a nerd - maybe something like a computer or board games club or the like.


This uni is terrible at societies and clubs. Im already in one but its tiny, and not making friends really.
Reply 35
Original post by student0210
This uni is terrible at societies and clubs. Im already in one but its tiny, and not making friends really.


Another option: get a job where you have to interact with people. Tescos, McDonalds wherever - doesn't matter - even volunteering at a charity shop. You will have no choice but to interact with people. Interacting with people will boost your confidence and you will get better at talking to strangers.
(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 36
The thing you have to ask yourself is whether you don't want to be alone because you don't want people to judge you or if you don't want to be alone because you really want friends. They're two very different things.

Original post by Matty919
Another option: get a job where you have to interact with people. Tescos, McDonalds wherever - doesn't matter - even volunteering at a charity shop. You will have no choice but to interact with people. Interacting with people will boost your confidence and you will get better at talking to strangers.

I have to admit, it's surprising how easily you adapt to being able to talk to people when you work in a shop. Away from the till though, I'm still a bit of a mess. :tongue:
(edited 11 years ago)
Why don't you just try and go out once in a while? And stick with the societies? You don't seem to enjoy anything but I can't see any other way for you to make friends if you don't make yourself open to making friends......
OP you have such a sceptical outlook on so many things suggested. Join a gym, build up muscle and your self esteem.

What uni btw?
Original post by sensingdevice
Well you can call the organisers of these activities to see whether there are young volunteers. I dont think volunteers are always older people, at least it is not true in my place. But if its true and you just want to stay in one place then things may be harder. But you can always search for some activities that only require two people to join such as traveling. There are so many people seeking a partner on websites. Maybe not traveling but some other things you just find out yourself.

Out of interest, I don't think being along is a bad thing. If you keep being an onlooker you can see things clearer. Many writers are like this kind and maybe you can join them:wink: Maybe you should think about why you need friends seriously. If you can function well without friends then just don't worry.


lol... yes having friends is so reprehensible. lol.. dopey PC society we live in these days.

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