[leala4628]

Username: leala4628
Age: 19
University: Cambridge
Course: Education with English
Other Info: Home educated from year 8-11 before joining sixth form college to study GCSEs and A Levels. I took GCSEs in English (A*), Geography (A*) and Maths (C). My A Levels were Economics (A), English Literature (A), Maths (A), General Studies (A) plus AEA English Distinction. I received offers from Cambridge, Durham, Lancaster, Bangor and York St Johns.

Any questions about home education, the A levels and GCSEs I took or the universities I applied to are welcome as long as they're sensible.

Blog Number One: They won't all be as boring as this...honest

It's just under 3 weeks until I make the journey to Cambridge to begin my life as a university student. A lot of feelings are going through my head right now and I'm hoping this blog will be an outlet for them in the future-if you get bored of my ramblings just nod along and pretend you're enjoying them Obviously my preparations for university began quite a long time ago now so I'll start off by telling you a bit about my journey to this point.

I've always loved learning and definitely envisaged myself at university from a young age. I can't remember being overly bothered about which one I ended up at as I didn't really follow media coverage of higher education (as some people tend to do now the Internet is in full flow) and my parents hadn't attended university so there was no pressure from them to apply to a certain one. I began ordering prospectuses in my GCSE year as I felt I needed the inspiration to motivate myself to continue with a very boring year of work. At the time I wasn't keen on moving too far away from home so I was looking at Lancaster and, at the furthest, York. I was certain I wanted to study music.

It's amazing what can change in a year though, during my AS year I realised my love of music didn't extend to a talent in all aspects of it such as composition which is what I would have needed to study the ''academic'' or theoretic course I had dreamed of. The obvious choice I turned to was English Literature, despite only choosing to study it at A Level in the few days before enrolling. I had fallen in love with Shakespeare and the other texts we had studied during the year (The Great Gatsby and Death of a Salesman). The passion my teachers had for the subject was also a major factor in my decision.

In the summer after my AS exams my sixth form college took about 8 of us on an overnight trip to the Cambridge open days. It was a great trip and I fell in love with the city of Cambridge-I loved the old buildings which were a true haven away from the bustle of city life and the scorching heat of the sun (that day at least!). Instead of going to a subject talk which I thought might just include everything I'd already read in the prospectus I spent an hour in King's College Chapel. The rest of the time I wandered around the city and spent some time talking to tutors and picking up leaflets. This was a great way to spend the open day in my opinion as I got a real feel for the people and place rather than the course, which I knew was for me.

My A2 year was less than perfect. I had lost my dad and developed anxiety (something which I had never understood previously). This meant I became very uncomfortable outside my own home and had a lot of trouble in the classroom. I ended up almost pulling out of my Cambridge interview (only deciding to attend the Saturday before going on the Monday) and later in the year I ended up taking a whole term off college (the exam term). It was a terrible, terrible year but I've come to realise that many students go through similar things which is why I'm including it here.

That is a very dense blog and I'll be surprised if anyone's actually made it to this point but it won't always be like this I promise so please continue to read my updates! I just wanted you to know about my background so you can tell if I'll be any use to you. In the next few blogs I'd like to cover some of the more interesting features of being a Cambridge fresher (my college parents for example) and the nightmare that is student finance. This will be alongside my worries about leaving home and generally starting this new chapter in my life. I will cover what I'm looking forward to about my course but there's already a rant about that in my profile if you're interested

If you would like me to include anything specific in future blogs don't hesitate to get in touch.

Natalie

[leala4628]

I hope this is acceptable. I know it's a bit long, rambling and irrelevant but my I feel like I have so much to get down so am doing my best to cover the boring introduction here

[miranda13]

I'm really sorry to hear about your dad (i know that means nothing from a stranger off the internet) but well done on getting through everything and still managing to make it to cambridge. your blog made me happy

[Electric_Dreams]

I read your 'defence' of your choice of Education in your profile and I have to say good on you for ignoring the criticism and pursuing it. You're right- education is extremely important and those people are just jealous, ignorant bigots.

[leala4628]

Blog Number Two: Student Finance is Poo

Well after 5 phonecalls from me to Student Finance in the past fortnight they have finally realised that all the evidence I sent at the beginning of June has been lost. This means I have to send it all off again and with the postal strikes plus university starting in 2 weeks it's not looking good. It's really worrying for all the students involved as, if you have bothered to get your application completed on time, by the start of term you should be able to focus solely on the year ahead not on whether you'll be able to prove payment of tuition fees and rent. I feel so sorry for those with children to care for who are waiting for childcare payments to come through as well as the regular grants. It has put a dampner on the start of university life for me as I can't settle my mind to anything until it's sorted.

On a lighter note I'm planning to search for the last few bits and bobs for university this week. I still need a couple of suitcases (I'm taking all my stuff down on the train as my family don't own a car), pots and pans, cutlery and crockery. Not forgetting some smart clothes for matriculation in my first week there.

It's really only hit me in the past couple of days that I'm actually going in 2 weeks! I can't believe it and it really doesn't seem like it's happening. The thing I'm most worried about (aside from finance issues) is my mum and sister. We've been a single parent family since I was small and I feel partly responsible for both of them, which probably sounds weird. I don't know if I can cope with my mum crying when I leave as she has a tendency to get very emotional at times such as these.

Will write a longer post soon

[leala4628]

Blog Number Three: Reading, Reading and More Reading...

Ever since I received my reading list a couple of months back I've stuck to a rigorous schedule of at least 7 hours reading and note taking per day to prepare me for university

^^LIES^^

Okay, so it's fair to say I haven't been as committed as is sensible to my reading list as I should have. I know loads of people don't even touch a book until they arrive at university but I really was determined to be prepared for my course this year. Unfortunately our best intentions often get swept under the carpet (or in my case swept under the pile of boxes it took to move my family and I from Blackpool to Sheffield over the summer). To summarise, upto now I've read a fair amount of things to do with Education but a less fair amount of things to do with English.

I've been struggling to get into my English reading list, mainly as it consists of literature I'm not really familiar with. One module focuses on medieval and renaissance literature and another on Greek drama-both of which seem a bit daunting to me. Especially when you read and read and read and read only to find out you know absolutely nothing of what's happened so have to go back to the beginning. This morning I had a breakthrough though, rather than the depressing tragedies I've been told to read and the stories about knights I decided to give an ancient Greek comedy a go. To my surprise and delight I read the whole play in one sitting and really enjoyed it! I now feel psyched to attack the more daunting texts on my list.

A part of my English course in the first term I am looking forward to is poetry. From what I can see we're doing a tour of modern(ishattimes) poetry from Blake, through Wordsworth, Rosetti, Hardy and Plath while hitting on other poets in between. This is the kind of thing which truly excites me!

My Education reading is going great but I'll tell you more about it in my next blog-when I applied to university I was picking between Ed with Eng, Theology or straight english. I'm now so glad I chose to study education as it is truly fascinating. I do sometimes wish I'd chosen Theology but it's so difficult to make that decision at the time as Theology and Literature are so interlinked. I intend to go into my english course with a positive attitude though, not the usual ithinkiwanttodosomethingdifferentafteronedayofthec ourse attitude I usually adopt when my mind isn't made up!

Under 2 weeks now

[Mazzia]

I know just what you mean about reading and nothing going in...

[leala4628]

Blog Number Four: Shopping, Shopping and Shopping!!

Yesterday I embarked on the great adventure of last minute shopping for uni. I made the decision to split my ''uni shop'' into 2 trips so I could make sure I didn't forget anything but my first trip (yesterday) was delayed due to my sister getting what we believe was swine flu last week along with the rest of her school.

Anyway, I was on the look-out for some smart clothes and suitcases. At Cambridge we have a matriculation photo and dinner in the first week and I'd made my mind up to wear just a smart blouse and black skirt however, I hadn't envisaged how difficult it would be to find a skirt that I like and looks smart enough for such an occassion. I ended up trying on a black dress which I fell in love with-I'm now going to the matriculation dinner in the said dress which should be fun. I'm a bit worried about these events as I have no idea what other people will be wearing and I don't want to look under-dressed, over-dressed or stick out like a sore thumb! The perils of being female-I'm tempted to buy a guy's suit. I also bought a couple of pairs of rather nice shoes it's exciting for me as I haven't concentrated much on shopping through my A Level years so it's like a whole new world has opened up!

I also purchased a couple of suitcases to take down on the train. I can't believe I'm going to have to pack up my life in a few suitcases and get them down to Cambridge on a train Luckily my mum and sister will be there to help me but still if they have a suitcase and I have a suitcase and my violin it could be a bit tricky. I'm particularly worried about the logistics of train travel incase we have 2 minutes to get across a station and have to negotiate stairs...

Overall I am pretty excited now! All I have to do is start packing (I tried out my books in one of the cases last night and it was all good ) and pick up some last minute bits and bobs, some of which are of a personal nature and, as this isn't H&R, I'm going to take it that you're not interested in that sort of thing

I was supposed to be going to a Michael Ball *cue laughs* concert this weekend but we've moved since the tickets were booked and I don't know if I'm up for 2 train rides in the space of a week when I have the packing and things to do too. Deep down I'm quite sad I'm missing it

Don't judge me for rambling!

[leala4628]

Blog Number Five: Emotions Running High

It's a week today that I set off for Cambridge-my mum's getting very emotional as it's our last weekend together as a family for 8 weeks. My younger sister has done her best to make it as hard as can be by refusing to go shopping with us and shouting constantly about how much work she has to do (she' ust started 6th form). Unfortunately she seems unable to do the work during the couple of hours a day she spends on Facebook talking to her friends

I'm quite emotional too today, I think I've been blocking out the reality of leaving home for 8 weeks in order to avoid getting too nervous but I can't really block it out much more! I'm truly excited but a bit scared as I don't know what to expect. I consoled myself this morning by looking at pictures in the CUSU Alternative Prospectus which shows Cambridge looking idyllic in the sun and made me smile

I keep packing my suitcases and unpacking-I know I need most of my things this week so can't pack fully so instead keep making sure everything I want to take down with me will fit in my bags!

My mind's been drifting to the kind of things I want to get involved in at uni recently. I've made a promise to myself to join some music societies/choirs and also to try and keep up with my singing and violin playing. That means finding a teacher (when my money from student finance finally comes through-I sent all my evidence off again last week). I'd also love to learn a foreign language but don't know whether to save that for my second year when I'll have a better idea of my workload.

In terms of work I've dipped into a bit of Chaucer this morning which was fun

[*R*a*c*h*]

Hey I love your blog I totally sympathize with you taking all your stuff down on the train as for the last two family holidays I've gone on with my parents we've gone from Newport train station - Reading - Gatwick with myself responsible for heaving the 3 large suitcases on and off the trains!!! I also play the violin and know what a nuisance those can be on public transport.

Thus, my advice to you is:
1. There is a lift in every decent sized station (at least the ones I've been to) or ramps in the small ones - LOCATE IT & MAKE USE OF IT!!!
2. If you can't heave your suitcase/trolley bag into the assigned luggage shelf thing either because its full, your bags are too heavy - leave them either in the bit between the carriages or the restaurant/shop carriage (if there's one). Alternatively, look around pleadingly at any strong looking men to help you lift luggage onto the top bit of the rack.
3. Has your violin case got 1/2 straps on it? If it has 2 wear it like a backpack - so you don't have to worry about it as well as your bags. If there's spare seats put it on one or in front of one, otherwise put it in the aisle/luggage rack.
4. Oh and if you've got 2 mins to cross platforms try and stop one of the station employees on your way to get them to radio over to hold the train/ make it obvious to the guy with the wavy stick thing that you're trying to get on the train/catch next train.

Overall don't worry and have a great time at Cambridge!!!

[leala4628]

Blog Number Six: Four Days

My feelings are really mixed up at the moment. I'm more excited than I've ever been but pangs of nervousness keep coming back. I'm also trying not to get over excited as I'll probably make myself ill with all the adrenaline

I've been hoping quite a lot that I don't get the flu that's going around-I've had mild symptoms the past couple of weeks but I definitely don't want to get it when I'm supposed to be arriving or travelling. Saying that I also don't want it during term time though...

My sister being ill means I still haven't got round to getting my final items but I'm going into town tomorrow to pick things up. I've also just given my mum a pile of washing to do

My mum keeps panicking about my ability *cough* to cook and wash clothes for myself. I'm quite confident about all of this-I can cook rice pretty well and my toasted teacakes are amazing

I realise this blog is pretty un-fluent but that's what my head is like at the moment

[leala4628]

Blog number seven: six in the morning

I'm setting of for cambridge in a couple of hours. All packed apart from some clothes I'm putting in at the last minute in a vain attempt to prevent creases

I didn't get to bed till 1 but had 5 hours sleep so all is well.

I'm too tired to determine whether today is an exciting or nervous day...

[leala4628]

Blog Number Eight: Cambridge Baby

It's my second night staying at Homerton College and it's been straight in at the deep end really. There's so much to do alongside getting to know everyone-today we had an introductory talk, a meeting with our tutor and a meeting with our Director of Studies (DOS). This afternoon we had our matriculation photo, it was more stressful than you would expect-raining, cold plus I was standing on a rickety stand and I have vertigo-not good. I ended up leaning on the guy next to me Not very classy.

This morning I was so emotional, I almost burst into tears in some of my meetings-my mum and sister went home today so I was quite upset.

Will talk more later-I'm so tired already!

[leala4628]

Blog Number Nine: Talk to Each Other!!

As you can see from my above post I was very emotional the other day today I'm feeling much better (although ironically I have a pest of a cold). I've spoken to a few other girls on my corridor who've been feeling exactly like me during the past few days. It's weird to think we've probably all been sat miserable in our rooms thinking exactly the same things as each other. As a consequence I've now vowed to speak to them a lot more

I've really perked up this afternoon and am now really excited at what lies ahead! There's the matriculation dinner on Thursday night (stupidly planned for the night of our first lectures) plus I'm hoping to join some societies. I've also been asked to write a diary for the Cambridge website (www.cam.ac.uk) along with some other freshers detailing our experiences of university life so I'll let you know when it's up.

I couldn't go to the freshers' fair today as I really didn't feel well but my college 'mum' signed me up to the music society and I'm hoping to take a look at the Christian Union. I've decided to audition for the new Homerton Chamber 'Chapel' Choir despite being terrified of singing by myself and am going to take singing lessons (my treat as sad as it sounds ).

See ya

Oh and look how pretty!

[leala4628]

Blog Number Ten: Matriculation Dinner

Matriculation is the point at which we become official members of The University of Cambridge. I suppose the process began on Sunday when we signed the piece of paper to matriculate, then on Monday we had a matriculation photo and tonight we had a matriculation dinner. It was amazing-I was sat on a table with my tutor and loads of people I didn't know but we still managed to have a great time! It lasted about 2 hours but the time just flew by. the dinner was by candlelight and we said the Homerton grace before sitting to eat (this consisted of 2 words in Latin-much better than the hour long ones at other colleges ). The principal of the college made a speech at the end and it sounds weird but everyone said it made them feel really proud. Unlike sixth form and school speeches this was one based on 800 years of history and community so it felt like it meant something. She also told us that the university was now officially the 2nd in the world which got a huge round of applause.

As you can probably tell from this I'm feeling so much better today-firstly my cold has almost gone so I can actually speak to people without feeling contagious and secondly I've just had a great day!

One not so great part was when a wasp flew into my room and my college brother plus a couple of girls on my corridor came to investigate. I suppose it was a way of us all gathering together and talking though! We couldn't find it though so hopefully it flew back out of the window. I'm still slightly worried about going to bed though for fear of swallowing it...

9am lecture tomorrow...luckily it's in the next building!

[_Claudia_]

What a great blog! I've read about ten things that made me think 'god, I'm exactly the same!' Congratulations on getting into Cambridge, and good luck I hope you'll add some more soon!
Claudia x

[leala4628]

Originally Posted by _Claudia_

What a great blog! I've read about ten things that made me think 'god, I'm exactly the same!' Congratulations on getting into Cambridge, and good luck I hope you'll add some more soon!
Claudia x

Thanks about to add some more-I should really have updated it before now

[leala4628]

Blog Number Eleven: Ups and Downs (or as Ronan would put it, life is a rollercoaster)

I was on a high when I wrote my last post and if I'd updated it just after that I'd have probably still been on a high. Unfortunately, I've had a bit of a bad week. I had health problems last year which resurface every so often just to make things a tad harder-they've resurfaced this past week (don't worry nothing serious, I get anxiety) and made me feel a bit

I've realised that my college choice might not have been the best one in my circumstances and I'm also having doubts about my course choice (great advert aren't I?!). With my college not being central I feel a bit isolated here, mainly because my illness means I get nervous about going far on my own. I feel like if I'd chosen a college in the city I could have built up my confidence by just going out for a bit safe in the knowledge my college was around the corner. Here, my lectures are next door so I have no excuse to get out for a bit (I thought this would be good at first but with hindsight it's not that great). I really sound like I'm complaining here but I'm not always like this-just when I'm in a good mood I don't get time to write! Plus it's good to let everyone know it's not always rosy etc etc

Now onto my course...I was in a real pickle when it came to choosing courses as I had my mind set on music then I didn't get the grades at AS so decided on English...I wanted to do Education as I was taught at home and it looked fun but now I'm here I feel like I want something more focussed-I know I'm not good enough to study music but I love the look of Theology and a course called ASNAC (Anglo Saxon Norse and Celtic) and I feel I might be more suited to those courses. I've emailed my tutor and will wait and see what he says...I guess now's the time to see whether the university ''support network'' really kicks into place.

On a higher note, I've met some nice people here-2 of whom are TSRers so if they're reading this. Plus my friend finally got her visa so has been able to join us

[leala4628]

Blog Number 12...

...

...

I wasn't allowed to change subject-my personal tutor was really nice when I went to him and he said it shouldn't be a problem-even when I told him I felt guilty about it he assured me that the university are there to support me so they'll do anything to make sure I'm happy. Unfortunately someone higher up than him has told me it's impossible for me to change subject unless I drop out and reapply for Theology from scratch-something I find unfair as other people have been allowed to change subject, a year has passed since I chose my subject so I think I'm entitled to have different thoughts now and it's me who's paying for the course! When I first started university I thought I was so privileged to have been accepted on a course and had a guilty feeling about my doubts, until I realised that I'm essentially a customer and I deserve to be satisfied!

Regarding my anxiety problems all I've got in the form of help is someone to talk to for one hour a week-no practical solutions or anything. My anxiety is linked to my food intolerances and I had to leave a lecture today as I tried a new food yesterday which has made me ill I'm feeling more confident in myself in general I just hate feeling ill and out of control as it stops me doing things I know I can and should be doing.

I've started singing lessons which is great-an hour a week when I can truly relax and enjoy myself. I have an audition for Britain's Got Talent next month but don't think I'll go as I don't feel like queuing for hours only to be told to get lost. I am entering a competition with my singing then so wish me luck!

[leala4628]

This should now be called leala4628's ''Reapplying for 2010'' blog

So, as many of you will have gathered from my moping around the forums I've now left Cambridge. It was a difficult decision to make especially as all everyone can say when you're thinking of dropping out of that place is ''but it's such an opportunity'' and ''a degree from Cambridge is worth however much''. I really don't understand that mentality-if I'm paying for something and giving up my time and effort I want it to be at a place I'm happy and for a subject I want to study and feel will be useful to me. I was a bit worried I'd regret leaving as soon as I got home but I felt so relieved to be honest-my only worries are financial (I have to see how much money I have to pay back and what with) and what people (who probably don't matter) will think of me for leaving. I'm kind of worried people will think I just gave up or didn't settle as I'm too attached to home or something

I've decided to reapply for Economics (long story...I know I tried switching to Theology while at Cambridge but that's because I preferred it above Education with English yet probably wouldn't have met the further maths requirement for Cambridge Economics-although it's not a necessity they like it). I've just been writing my personal statement but I forgot how ridiculously little room they give you in which to detail your academic and personal interests It's ended up sounding more like an essay and I have 2 introductory paragraphs one of which I need to get rid of in order to include some reading or other topics in it. I hate the idea that by sounding stupid in my PS admissions tutors might just reject me. I'm also worried about my lack of GCSEs-it wasn't a factor last year as my course was less competitive but Economics is in high demand an my C at GCSE Maths might pose a problem I need to update my sig as my university choices keep changing-I'm thinking of applying to York, Durham and Warwick initially, seeing what comes from them and before the deadline adding another couple of choices when I've looked at the alternatives in detail.

So, if anyone has any questions about dropping out or reapplying I'm your girl


Oh, yeah I also have terrible flu which comes with the worst sore throat I have EVER experienced. Not good. I'm trying to keep occupied, mainly by writing this