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It actaully makes me sick thinking about it. After having a panic attack in june I haven't been able to stop thinking about it. I have the mentality of, say, a 90 year old i.e. i am too scared to think about next year just in case im not here :O Its crazy, I know there is no sense in thinking like this, and I want it to stop, but the feeling of immenent doom will not leave me and it terrifies me. I would not fear death if I knew I was going to live a long life though, I think I am more worried about dying before 'my time'. Depressing stuff.

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