Am I being unreasonable?

Basically me and my ex split up half a year ago, and while it wasnt the best break up we still said we'd stay friends.
When I saw him a couple of months ago I gave him my new number so that we could keep in touch, to which he said "yeah sure of course".
that was ages ago and he hasnt even made any effort to stay in touch with me! The point is it feels such a shame that Ive lost him as a mate cos we were really close.
So a couple of nights ago I got a bit drunk and text him somethin like "why dont u even bother stayin in touch wit me" etc... he replied asking who this was cos he didnt recognise the number! So obviously he had no intention of staying mates cos he didnt even save my number :mad:

Do u think im bein unreasonable in expecting us to stay friends? After all he said he wanted to stay in touch but doesnt even bother!
Should I just tell him to piss off and completely ignore him for the rest of my life? It makes me angry to think he doesnt even value my friendship after everything we went through. tell me whether I am wrong for wanting so much as an odd text message to see how I am!?

Reply 1

Book

I think it is not unreasonable to want to keep in touch with your ex. But, if he's not up for it, I don't think there's much you can do. Though, it could just be that his phone's playing up. Maybe you should remind him who you are and take things as they go. best wishes.

Reply 2

_poptart_

Book

I doubt it his phone is quite new and it would seem a bit suspicious if it happened to not recognise people's numbers lol. it just makes me angry that he didnt even bother saving my number, like he thought im obviously not good enough to stay in touch with.

Reply 3

Book

Maybe, I'm not an expert with phones or technology. But he could have just forgotten to add your number to his phone. If I were you I'd remind him who tyou are and see what he says. There could be a perfectly acceptable reason that we're not thinking of. best wishes

Reply 4

Lush Law

Water under the bridge and all that...it's not like you made an effort until you sent the drunken text. So he hasn't made an effort, but neither have you.

Reply 5

Shelbycakes

i think if he doesnt want to keep in touch there's not a lot you can do! unless you want to stalk him .....

Reply 6

_poptart_

yeah maybe, its just I sent my new number directly to his phone so i cant see why it wouldnt be on there unless he didnt bother savin it?!
He also said because he thought i had a new boyfriend there wasnt anyway he could text me anyway?! But thats crap because I wasnt expressing undying love for him for gods sake, simply asking for a text message on the odd occasion :biggrin:

Reply 7

_poptart_

Shelbycakes

i think if he doesnt want to keep in touch there's not a lot you can do! unless you want to stalk him .....

no I think ill pass to be honest :rolleyes:

if he cant be arsed to press the save button on his phone he aint exactly a great loss of a friend is he!

Reply 8

dave

poptart86

no I think ill pass to be honest :rolleyes:

if he cant be arsed to press the save button on his phone he aint exactly a great loss of a friend is he!

I think you have the answer there. Let him go - he obviously doesn't value your friendship - let's face it - how many times do we say "yeah - we'll stay friends" and then promptly lose touch (the "meeting people on holiday syndrome".)
YOU patently MEANT it when you said it. HE didn't.
Find someone who's worthy of you. :wink:

Reply 9

_poptart_

Yeah thats what i realise - he obviously aint that much of a loss of a friend really is he!
i think it just hurts my pride to think that someone who knew me inside out can then decide Im not worth staying in contat with. Thats what my problem is really I guess :biggrin:

Reply 10

moser88

what an unsensible exfriend.........
anyway, tell him that you're pissed off!
then do what u feel is right !!

Reply 11

frost105

It maybe that he said he wanted to keep in contact to not hurt your feelings. maybe its too hard for him to be in contact with you.
Either way you cant force someone to be friends with you so move on

Reply 12

_poptart_

frost105

Either way you cant force someone to be friends with you so move on

i understand that, but he should have been truthful with me and say to me couldnt give two ***** about staying in touch! id appreciate his honesty :p:

Reply 13

dave

poptart86

I'm gonna play devil's advocate. You state that your pride's hurt (that's being honest) - perhaps his is also. However I wouldn't advise getting in touch at all - HE cut the contact - not you. Don't go "chasing" a dying star. :wink:

Reply 14

Meat Loaf Rocks

I've been in your ex's position and it is very uncomfortable.
You feel as if you don't know what to talk about and that you just upset each other how ever much you still wants to be mates.
If he has a girlfriend then he probably doesn't want to rub your nose in it, becasue inevitably if you text/go for a drink etc then your love life will come up and if he tells you it feels like its rubbing your nose in it, if he doesn't he feels as if he is lying to you. Also if he has a girlfriend she may get jealous if you were on the scene just as a mate.

I would suggest you give him another text saying who you are and then say do you want to stay in touch or not

just my advise

Reply 15

_poptart_

I think im gonna leave it now, I cant really be bothered with someone who says one thing and then goes and does another!
obviously I understand it is gonna be hard cos i am an ex girlfriend and of course its awkward cos Ive been seeing other blokes and I guess hes prob got a new girlfriend.
Anyway, if anything happens good or bad ill let you know!