The Student Room Group

21, m, final year of uni and 'still' a virgin

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Reply 140
white_haired_wizard
Lib's a virgin himself, clearly. Going off his ranting, he's clearly very frustrated.

Haha! I agree
Of course you agree, luv!
Reply 142
GentleGuy
whoah, loads of responses. thanks a lot people it really is appreciated!

i guess im not very comfortable with myself and i probs do need to take up a few hobbies i guess. at the moment i simply play guitar, listen to music, play video games, watch porn (what guy doesnt?!)

Double Agent ur probs right about the bold parts but i'm not 'complaining' about not having sex as such, i'm just extremely confused and sometimes get depressed about why it hasn't happened for me yet, especially when i talk to guys younger than me who are talking about it :frown:


Hey dude, I didn't read all of your thread yet so I don't know whether the topic I'm about to bring up has been touched yet, but here it goes...


Try to research Pick Up Art.

I'm not kidding. You seem to have the traditional Nice Guy Syndrome which I can relate to as well. I recommend you check out "The Game" by Neil Strauss. It's a book that pretty much introduces you into the world of guys who make creating attraction into a science.

Good luck :smile:
Reply 143
white_haired_wizard
Lib's a virgin himself, clearly. Going off his ranting, he's clearly very frustrated.


Shut your face or I'll hunt you down and bugger you sideways.
Reply 144
Anonymous
I'm East Asian and there're hardly any East Asians in UK.


why should that have an effect on your sex life?
Strikes me that your main hobbies revolve around solitary confinement. In my experience, being 'out there' drastically improves your chances. By which I mean, you'll physically encounter hundreds of women per day.

The more women you talk to, the better your confidence, the larger your network, et al. Probably also a good idea to get yourself into the position where you're comfortable making a move.

After all, fate's fickle. Sure, you could 'fall in love' with a randomer on the tube one day. But - as once suggested by a Mr Chris Morris - you're just as likely to be killed by a shaft of frozen urine released by a transatlantic airliner.

Confidence. Personality. Something to talk about. Sort all three and you'll be well on your way to a healthy, fulfilling sex life!
GentleGuy
I'm now 21 (and a half) and half way through my final year of uni. I don't go out that much coz I live at home (to save money for a decent future and hopefully a nice family home for a lovely wife) and my small group of uni friends also all live at home (and don't live close to me).

I've always had friends and had no real problem socialising with people coz I can be quite a funny guy sometimes. But i just cannot figure out why barely any girls like me more than just a friend (I had a dozen female friends at school).

Growing up I learned to be kind and considerate and especially when it came to girls I'd be honest with them and treat them like true ladies. After going through most of my uni life now I realise ladies don't really exist anymore and gentlemen don't exist either.

I lacked confidence with attractive girls at school because I have worn glasses since I was 5, and my blonde hair has always made me feel weak as a male, because blonde hair is seen as feminine. I do wear contact lenses now, have done so for the last 4 years, but it hasn't changed my luck with girls at all.

I always hate going through christmas seeing couples because it makes me angry that I have never experienced a true relationship. And now valentine's day is fast approaching... :frown:

Finally, I have snogged a girl and actually turned down sex with the school slut (because I knew she'd already slept with half my mates and it just felt wrong to sleep with her).

I REALLY need some advice, from anyone! PLEASE! :confused:


i'm guessing poster no. 2 utilised his first option :p:

anyways - ur doing the right thing - sounds like me actually - maybe take a chance on one of the girls u have as friends - what's the worst that can happen really - i don't really believe in this 'friend zone' thing - i don't think many girls (i mean some obviously do) - but not many girls actually would mentally think about someone - esp someone like yourself as 'only a friend forever' - i reckon if you asked one of your female friends to meet you just together then u might be suprised

ur doing the right thing - i turned down a slut down once too - i mean it was on here (or facebook - can't remember) - so she might have been taking the piss - but still - lol - keep acting the way you are it'll happen :smile:

i mean i may be talking completely out of my bottom :s-smilie: - because i'm in the same position as u but a bit younger - but just believe it will happen don't actually look for it and someone better who's ust right for u might come along then :smile:

hope i wasn't talking complete crap there :smile:
So I'm almost 18 and didn't have my first kiss. You'll get used to it.
Your hobby is porn. Do you have a meeting with your friends each week to see who can get off to it the quickest or something?

But, yeah, what other people have said, get out there and talk to girls.
L i b
Every single :snow::snow::snow::snow::snow::snow::snow: day we get this :snow::snow::snow::snow:. Every :snow::snow::snow::snow::snow::snow::snow: day. Do you know what it's doing to our mental health?

"Oh, I'm a virgin, nanananana; isn't my life so :snow::snow::snow::snow:?" Well, guess what: nobody gives a tinker's cuss. Hell, given my own teenage fumblings and dalliances with neurotic girls back in the day, I'm inclined to say you're the lucky ones. Now go and have a :snow::snow::snow::snow: and quit your moaning.


you need to take a chill pill :yes:
GentleGuy
I'm now 21 (and a half) and half way through my final year of uni. I don't go out that much coz I live at home (to save money for a decent future and hopefully a nice family home for a lovely wife) and my small group of uni friends also all live at home (and don't live close to me).

I've always had friends and had no real problem socialising with people coz I can be quite a funny guy sometimes. But i just cannot figure out why barely any girls like me more than just a friend (I had a dozen female friends at school).

Growing up I learned to be kind and considerate and especially when it came to girls I'd be honest with them and treat them like true ladies. After going through most of my uni life now I realise ladies don't really exist anymore and gentlemen don't exist either.

I lacked confidence with attractive girls at school because I have worn glasses since I was 5, and my blonde hair has always made me feel weak as a male, because blonde hair is seen as feminine. I do wear contact lenses now, have done so for the last 4 years, but it hasn't changed my luck with girls at all.

I always hate going through christmas seeing couples because it makes me angry that I have never experienced a true relationship. And now valentine's day is fast approaching... :frown:

Finally, I have snogged a girl and actually turned down sex with the school slut (because I knew she'd already slept with half my mates and it just felt wrong to sleep with her).

I REALLY need some advice, from anyone! PLEASE! :confused:


Well turning people down shows that at least you are still a virgin because you are dignified and not a ****. I think the averge age is about 17 so loads of 21 yos prob are, especially ones going to uni.
Reply 151
By the way, two guys have now recommended you to read "The Game".


























Just saying.
you're a permavirgin, kill yourself.
L i b
Shut your face or I'll hunt you down and bugger you sideways.


Better start drilling holes into my sides then :cool:
I think you sound sweet :smile:

Just hang in there. If you're really looking to meet someone special, then it might take a while, but what's the rush?
mr-breaker
wat?

Don't improve your body?
Don't improve your health?
Don't dress (and make an effort to look) better?
Don't become a more interesting person?
Don't become a better person?

ARE YOU ******* KIDDING ME?

You need to stop giving out advice if that's the best you can come up with


woah chill out, all i was saying was, you shouldn't change just because someone tells you to.
Reply 156
wow cant believe how many responses i've had!

ok. i will try looking for that book called the game (tho im a very terrible reader, i havent read a complete book since secondary school, which is around 7 years now?)

in terms of my confidence, and acting. hmm its funny thats mentioned coz im wicked at impersonations and did an extra bit of acting back at school, so maybe i shud just exploit that in terms of acting confident :s

random conversations, whoever said that thank you! i will really try this. i normally feel as tho i dnt want to intrude in other ppls daily lives unless im invited. if sum1 starts a convo with me im gr8 but im never the person to say the first sentence!

in terms of my appearance, i dnt want to look like the sort of guy who has spent the last year of his life making himself look good. thanks for the advice but to me that sounds like you will look like a guy who only cares about yourself. i will have to meet in the middle with this one. i did mention i DO wear contacts now, so glasses are history. my hair is probs an issue, coz i never style it, its long (always past my shoulders) because im too lazy to maintain it :frown: i always wished when i was younger that i would b bald so i wudnt have to worry. but now i want as much hair as i can while i have it :s strange way of thinking yeh. i always wanted to be different so i just grew my hair, i saw it as though there really arent many hairstyles for guys nowadays - u have skinhead, graded 1-5, short back n sides, or emo. and those r the only acceptable hairstyles????

in terms of going out i mite also b part of a dying breed... im very passionate about music (rock and classic rock) and one thing i hate most is modern nightclubs playing all the same music. the heavy bass physically makes me feel sick, i cant describe it. so this restricts my options to places i enjoy, which sounds sad and selfish i know, but there u go :frown: ideally one major trait i look for in a girl, is that she shares the same music taste. thats why i tried social networking sites, but it just seems like im getting nowhere with it. before u ask, no im not an emo, i dnt do all that falloutboy and whatever the other emo bands are, lol. i just have a passion for music. just like some guys have a passion for sport or cars or their muscles.

i can say one thing tho. wenever im with friends, i am usually the most confident person there, im always witty sarcastic smiling and making ppl laugh but yeh, thats part of the method i need to stick to. i just need to reach the next step!

if any1 wants to comment on anything ive just said please feel free! im just reflecting on all the great advice i've had from this thread so far! thanks :biggrin:
Reply 157
oh and one final point. one thing i do hate about me is my teeth :frown: they're horrible unless u look at my face directly. i was scared of having braces when i was younger coz my teeth always bled brushing my teeth, but i can manage contact lenses n my eyes are far more sensitive than my teeth, so i may aswell try braces. however long that takes :frown:

GIRLS - what is your opinion on a 21-23 yr old guy wearing braces?????
Fi fo fum, I smell a troll
Reply 159
im the same but im 17, i think you should just keep doing what you do because i think when girls get to your age they will realise that they need a sensible guy like you

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