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I always get this line "Your really sweet but...." :(

Hey i'm really starting to get a bit peeved about that line^^ as much as i like being seen as sweet by girls, its really starting to annoy me, as i cant get a girlfriend even at 20.

It just seems that whatever i do is wrong, i try and add a bit of confidence to my personal self, and thats wrong. So wtf is wrong with me, starting to think its my looks, i mean im not dicaprio or pitt, but im not ugly either so whats wrong with me.

As whenever I try and get a girlfriend I prefer to get to know the girl first before jumping into a relationship, why is that a bad thing? I dont see the attraction to one night stands or quickie relationships, whats the point then. Surely when you get into a relationship you would try your hardest to make it work, and if it doesnt then so be it but atleast you tried. It just seems that i'm the problem and everyone around me cant see why i cant get a girlfriend as when im upset people are like whats up, your not your happy go luck self, youve lost your smile.

Is it cos i cant flirt? I cant tease as i find it hard as i hope i dont hurt the girls feelings. I look for both personality and looks in a girl so thats why id like to get to know a girl before.

I just cant seem to read girls hints now cos ive been rejected and hit for six sooo many times, i just go into trying to get a gf with confidence yeah but with something in the back of my mind expecting a no.

Like recently ive been chasing a girl and with her shes different cos i've fallen, head over heals, for her shes so so so perfect her looks, her personality everything about her is perfect for me. But once again i fear ive been rejected as before ive had a flat out no, but with her, the text is confusing i dont know whether what she said was code for "i dont want to go out with you" or whether it was "*compliments me* - theres too much going on in my life right now, I want to go out with you but cant because of my busy lifestyle atm, ask me again later, as ive just broken up with my bf 2months ago and dont really know what to do regarding dating" as tbh its given me hope but dont know whether theres much point in asking her out again, as she had said yes twice before and let me down, then again i didnt know whether she knew whether i was asking her out as when i asked straight, do you wanna go on a date I got that line^^, but i know shes busy, so have I fallen into the rejection pile once again, hope i havent. :s

Just wanna avoid that line once again and kinda make myself more attractive, but then again why should i change who i am, as then they wouldve become attracted to someone im not then when im settled id just fall back into same old me.

So WTF can i do to become more attractive to girls, cos atm i feel nothing is gonna ever go right and ill never find a girlfriend. :frown:

Just wanna be myself. :frown:

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You're ugly.
Reply 2
knew someone was gonna say that, some serious advice please lolz
get a better hairstyle
Anonymous

Like recently ive been chasing a girl and with her shes different cos i've fallen, head over heals, for her shes so so so perfect her looks, her personality everything about her is perfect for me.



This is why you can't get a girlfriend.
You're not being manly enough. You're probably coming across as insecure and a bit needy, and that girl is just dragging you along for an ego boost instead of having the balls to be honest and say 'I'm just not that into you.'

Putting us on a pedestal is not sexy. Nor is being a pri**, but the thing about pri**s is, they often also demonstrate fundamental masculine qualities along with their p****ness. Qualities such as assertiveness, wit, leadership, status.

In the words of Hitch, 'with no game, and go guile, there's no girl.' Apart from, perhaps, a girl who's settling due to her own issues.
You are probably too nice.

^ advice is good.
Reply 7
The_Jammy_Witch
You're not being manly enough. You're probably coming across as insecure and a bit needy, and that girl is just dragging you along for an ego boost instead of having the balls to be honest and say 'I'm just not that into you.'

Putting us on a pedestal is not sexy. Nor is being a pri**, but the thing about pri**s is, they often also demonstrate fundamental masculine qualities along with their p****ness. Qualities such as assertiveness, wit, leadership, status.

In the words of Hitch, 'with no game, and go guile, there's no girl.' Apart from, perhaps, a girl who's settling due to her own issues.


whose ego boost, im guessing hers, but ive gotten to know her and she just isnt like that.:-S Hopefully if i become manly enough, ill get her and other girls that i meet to like me, i know I cant "make" people like me but you know what i mean, maybe attractiveness will be a better word here.

But how do I show those? Without coming across as a pr*** where in life can i show manlyness and stuff etc etc like youve listed cos im sturggling to find situations and the way i talk to show that. Cos tbh i like being called a great guy and sweet, but i actually want a girlfriend lolz

I want to show girls that I am BF material so to speak, cos ive tried everything and it just aint workin bro.
Reply 8
turn and fall
You are probably too nice.

^ advice is good.


but i dont think i am, in a way, only throwing compliments here and there, and not being a compelte and utter knob all the time and not teasing a girl n stuff, just cant see it as too nice, dont want to be so little in being nice that it isnt a hint that i like a girl and im just being friendly to being too nice like you say tbh. I can have a bita friendly banter but only if she starts the banter by teasing me.
You're either needy, ugly, gay or all three.
If I was generalising I would say that you are a "nice guy" and at this age girls tend not to want "nice guys", they want someone who they can have fun with, who in the end will cheat on them or break their hearts. You, being the nice boy that you are, will pick them up and comfort them whilst secretly loving them, and then they'll go back off with another douche bag. This will continue for many years until their hormones settle down, they see you for the stable, kind person that you are, marry you and then you have lots of sex and babies.
Reply 11
Don't be so 'nice'. Tease a girl and make her feel like just any other person because at the end of the day that is what most girls really want, they don't want to be put up on a pedestal. They want an equal partner.

btw, in regards to this girl I would take it as a rejection. There is no such thing as being too busy for a relationship.
Reply 12
Holly Hiskey
If I was generalising I would say that you are a "nice guy" and at this age girls tend not to want "nice guys", they want someone who they can have fun with, who in the end will cheat on them or break their hearts. You, being the nice boy that you are, will pick them up and comfort them whilst secretly loving them, and then they'll go back off with another douche bag. This will continue for many years until their hormones settle down, they see you for the stable, kind person that you are, marry you and then you have lots of sex and babies.


thats one way to put it lol, dont seem the attraction to complete and utter mug that'll just break their heart, whereas like you say with me, i would try and have a loving relationship with the girl, and care fore her etc etc. Now just wanna improve myself tbh, but dont want to change myself into a mug.
No offence mate but you sound like a 'doormat'.
Reply 14
Hi,

just be yourself and youll find someone thats right for you. dont forget your backbone tho.

it sounds as tho your persuit of a girl is making you feel a bit trodden on, and that will only shine through and maybe make you look a bit desperate. maybe try to forget girls for a bit, or try some confidence lessons.

Its all aout attitude!! dont try too hard. youve asked the girl out before and she let you down, so asking her again makes u look desperate and will do nothing for your self esteem. you dont have to play hard to get exactly if u dont like that - but dont be a puppy dog. just dont chase girls in that way. if someone doesnt want to be with you, just accept it - if they dont like you, sod them. everyboy gets turned down sometimes.

I dont think this girl wants to date you. No matter how busy a girl was, if she really liked you she would date you. dont chase her coz not only ill u look desperate to her, you will look desperate to all the other girls too.

Hope this helped.
Reply 15
Don't be a dick, but light teasing works. Don't think of girls as other species. Would you tease your friend if you saw him do something embarrassing? If the answer's no, you are FAR too nice. If the answer is yes, then why is it so hard with a girl. I don't mean properly tease her, but if you do tease her a little, show you don't mean it with a smile, or a laugh. Girls aren't so fragile a few words are going to hurt them. Sure, don't punch them in the arm playfully if you have a good right hook, but don't try to wrap them up in cotton wool.
Reply 16
btw, tht nice guy thing - loads of girls DO want nice guys, they just dont want guys who try to be nice, or are only nice. most girls i know (myself being 1) like to have a good laugh, good sex, and good conversation. being an a hole s not a prerequisite, so dont think thats what girls want coz it isnt. only the abused want a-holes.
Reply 17
Ive been hit for six sooo many times, now when i like a girl i dont want to tease her and then ruin it, i tend to worry if im going to say the wrong thing, maybe admitting to a girl that i like her is the wrong thing, but i cant just keep it a secret, whats the point, i'll have to tell her at some point. Especially when youve actually had a yes from a few girls and then the date never happens, this has happened a coupla times itd get to around the time then "oh i cant make it sorry" just not feeling good atm

with this girl though its been really confusing cos id ask her out on a date get a yes and we'd plan it then it wont happen, :-s, so i dont know whether she does like me or not tbh. probably not but if i improve myself id become more attractive. Dont know whether id bother asking her out again tbh.
Reply 18
no she doesnt like you. if she did she wouldnt cancel twice. this is rejection. stop chasing her coz u r making yourself look silly in front of her and all other girls. she is not the right girl for you.
Reply 19
and dont feel u need to improve yourself!! this is prob what lets u down. love yourself!!

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