(Original post by TotoMimo)
We can't all be Michel Roux Jr every day. Some days, we try
to be. Other days, we end up as some kind of retarded Heston Blumethal, trying out brave (EDIT: idiotic) recipe ideas that turn out disgusting.
Sometimes it's not on purpose. Sometimes just a simple oversight or laziness that can yield these hilarious failures.
And sometimes, it's something outwith your control, an act of god, the mighty deity intent on having a bit of a hee-haw at your expense.
I shall start us off with two of my own; both pizza-related, incidentally!
Neither are elaborate tales of food failures, but failures nonetheless. The first was just plain stupid ignorance. I'd fired up the oven, popped open my cheap supermarket pizza box, and literally just tipped the frozen pizza straight onto the tray in the oven, chucked the box, closed the oven door, and went straight back to playing my Gamecube.
After twenty minutes, I went back into the kitchen to the foulest smell ever. God knows how I didn't notice it beforehand. Upon opening the oven door, the smell was UNBEARABLE. Oh, yeah, I forgot to inspect my pizza before chucking it in the oven...
Some pizzas come wrapped in plastic.
The second story was through personal stupidity too. Now, I have a confession - I personally LOVE the taste of pizza when it's been microwaved. You know those cheapy value cheese and tomato pizzas? They're amazing done in the microwave. They remind me of the old "Teenage Mutant Hero Turtles Pizzas" that came in packs of ten, each the size of a small saucer, packaged in a cylinder formation (those of you who've had them will experience similar love for their cheap, simplistic brilliance).
Well anyway, at the time, Frescetta
were on special, so I'd gotten one and fired it in the microwave. What I neglected to notice is that these are the variety that feature part-baked, "rise in the oven", almost RAW dough, as you all know. What ensued was the most ****ing ridiculous doughy mess I have ever encountered, strewn across the floor and walls of my microwave. Needless to say a flatmate dared me to "try it", but I respectfully declined.
Okay, YOUR TURN, GUYS!
PS, Whoever posts first is the King/Queen of the Galaxy, and wins a bar of Galaxy.
You'll have to pay for yourself, but hey - you deserved it. Plus you can afford it.
You're King/Queen of the Galaxy.