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Worried!

I'm started to become more and more worried about starting uni in September. I suffer from M.E (chronic fatigue) so will be totally useless at things like going out/clubbing etc- I just wouldn't cope. I don't want people to think I'm not making an effort and am worried I wont make friends. I was hoping to take a gap year to try and recover but then the fees went up :redface:

How much of a problem do you think it will be?

Thanks for reading :smile:

Reply 1

SemperVivum

Universities are diverse places with a very broad mix of people with different interests. You don't have to be a partier / clubber to make friends. If you go into lectures / seminars and just look reasonably friendly (smile, positive demeanour etc) people will chat to you. It's only the sulky gits in hoodies on the back row that get ignored). Once you start meeting people in classes then you can socialise outside of them at whatever level you are comfortable with.

Reply 2

cookiemonster101

Just explain to people that you have ME...it's reasonably common now so people would know what you were on about and would understand your limitations and be sympathetic.

Reply 3

charlietheunicorn

Don't worry universities are very accommodating places. If you explain the situation to people they will understand and still try and accommodate you into group plans. Then you have societies where you meet people with identical interests that rarely revolve around drinking.
Don't worry, I had similar health concerns about going to uni and it turned out that the majority of people didn't care about it and where just more interested in doing things with me that we all could do.

Don't defer for a year unless you can guarantee a major improvement in your ME otherwise its not worth it

Reply 4

CameraGirl

I know someone who went to university with ME, and they're doing absolutely fine, have made loads of friends and now she has a boyfriend too. People will understand, and if you can't go out clubbing, it's not the end of the world, uni is so much fun without that anyway! Especially if you're in halls, everyone tends to get on really really well, especially in their first year, and you should have no problem at all :biggrin:

you'll enjoy it! good luck :smile:

Reply 5

therealOG

Just let your friends know about your condition. It'll be fine :smile:

Reply 6

munki

probably what charlietheunicorn said: societies and perhaps union activities: its easy to take on a role that can be flexible enough to work around your condition which could certainly give you the chance to meet and get to know people.

Reply 7

Pheebs1201

Thanks for the replies everyone, feeling a bit better now :smile:

Reply 8

mother_eve3088

Original post by cookiemonster101

Just explain to people that you have ME...it's reasonably common now so people would know what you were on about and would understand your limitations and be sympathetic.

This.

People are very understanding. There were some people I knew at uni who have ME and who still joined along with most of the stuff we did - just not the clubbing part. Still great fun though :biggrin:

Reply 9

xoxAngel_Kxox

I don't have ME but I chose not to go clubbing at uni, and I still had an amazing time with the people I met! I find that it's not like school anymore; people are a lot more accepting and understanding.. if you just explain to them about it, they will still be friends! :biggrin:

Reply 10

KingoftheNazgul

University is definitely much easier than school in that respect. You ca socialise through societies and the student union even if you didn't find people living around you who enjoyed the odd non-clubbing night, which I find highly unlikely.

I really don't enjoy clubbing at all, as I have hyper-acusis and the noise drives me INSANE. But I've got lots of friends who joined me in my anti-clubbing activities, and we still have fun. I also know people at other unis who don't go clubbing, and in fact, I think it tends to die down after the initial freshers bit anyway. Don't worry, you will definitely make friends.