Eating Disorders and life with one - Discussions, Opinions, Advice.
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some rice and cereal not a lot the rice freaked me out tbh but it was spicy
also had 2 cups tea n 1 coffee with sugar
and bit of choclte xxxxxxxxx feeling oki a bit xxxxxxxxx
also had 2 cups tea n 1 coffee with sugar
and bit of choclte xxxxxxxxx feeling oki a bit xxxxxxxxx
Original post by diamonddust
Has anyone spoken to Squiff or heard from her? I'm a bit worried because she hasn't posted for a while.
Has anyone spoken to Squiff or heard from her? I'm a bit worried because she hasn't posted for a while.
Hey hun. Sorry that you had such a bad day
Am in contact with Squiff - not sure if I could speak for her but I think she is avoiding the thread as certain posts made a her and a few people feel guilty for not being at the 'right' stage to make the positive changes. And some were made to feel guilty about possibly making others ill. It made some people A LOT worse.
I get the impression she is making some really positive changes now. She's a fighter
(edited 12 years ago)
Yeah I haven't been on this thread for a while either as I found it was quite triggering and with it being exam season last week everything was getting a bit too much.
Custard, I am incredibly proud of you. Food is not the enemy and I bet your tongue is doing a mega-happy-dance at the prospect of all these gorgeous new treats you've been deprived of for so long! Just think - the yummy taste of sponge pudding etc - THAT'S YOUR MEDICINE!! Think of all the poor sods that have painful, disgusting, disorientating treatments, where your medicine is experiencing the culinary delights of the world!
Diamond, I can empathise with your mood swings but I am currently on a positive, so I thought I'd post (as Cinamon says, this thread is designed to incite positivity towards eating disorders and as such it's important to take these times to give hope to others). After the constant Twocal and Fortisip guzzlage, a 2000 calorie a day meal plan, and a dose of reality in the form of that phantom heart attack, I am getting close to reaching a BMI of 16 (98lb/7stones)!
Stay positive everyone. The demon wants to use food, your anxieties and fears, use them against you and make you more ill; but think about all of us, think about all of the people who love you, who are there with you, everyone on this forum, then think about your ED over there on the other side all by itself. We are an army and that ED is dwarfed by absolutely everyone in your support network.
I am here, they are here, WE are here for whoever needs that strength.
Post more often people, I need to make sure everyone is okay.
SO MUCH LOVE. XXX
Diamond, I can empathise with your mood swings but I am currently on a positive, so I thought I'd post (as Cinamon says, this thread is designed to incite positivity towards eating disorders and as such it's important to take these times to give hope to others). After the constant Twocal and Fortisip guzzlage, a 2000 calorie a day meal plan, and a dose of reality in the form of that phantom heart attack, I am getting close to reaching a BMI of 16 (98lb/7stones)!
Stay positive everyone. The demon wants to use food, your anxieties and fears, use them against you and make you more ill; but think about all of us, think about all of the people who love you, who are there with you, everyone on this forum, then think about your ED over there on the other side all by itself. We are an army and that ED is dwarfed by absolutely everyone in your support network.
I am here, they are here, WE are here for whoever needs that strength.
Post more often people, I need to make sure everyone is okay.
SO MUCH LOVE. XXX
Im having a bad day cos i just feel guilty regarding smoking and im gorging on chocolate
not gonna post anything too negative
good luck everyone all the best
not gonna post anything too negative
good luck everyone all the best
Original post by Cinamon
Hey hun. Sorry that you had such a bad day
Am in contact with Squiff - not sure if I could speak for her but I think she is avoiding the thread as certain posts made a her and a few people feel guilty for not being at the 'right' stage to make the positive changes. And some were made to feel guilty about possibly making others ill. It made some people A LOT worse.
I get the impression she is making some really positive changes now. She's a fighter
Am in contact with Squiff - not sure if I could speak for her but I think she is avoiding the thread as certain posts made a her and a few people feel guilty for not being at the 'right' stage to make the positive changes. And some were made to feel guilty about possibly making others ill. It made some people A LOT worse.
I get the impression she is making some really positive changes now. She's a fighter
Send her my e-love.
And
to you, hope you're ok. Original post by NotSoCool.Fly
Im having a bad day cos i just feel guilty regarding smoking and im gorging on chocolate
not gonna post anything too negative
good luck everyone all the best
not gonna post anything too negative
good luck everyone all the best
Congratulations Toto!
I really didn't mean my post to come across as negative.
I didn't think it was really, I didn't do anything 'wrong' ED wise. It was just about mood swings and how they make you feel crazy and tired even when you've done ok. I didn't think posting about mood swings would be particularly demotivating or triggering. Sorry if it was. I'm going to be fairly busy for the next two weeks so I won't be posting much.
to you all.
Original post by TotoMimo
Custard, I am incredibly proud of you. Food is not the enemy and I bet your tongue is doing a mega-happy-dance at the prospect of all these gorgeous new treats you've been deprived of for so long! Just think - the yummy taste of sponge pudding etc - THAT'S YOUR MEDICINE!! Think of all the poor sods that have painful, disgusting, disorientating treatments, where your medicine is experiencing the culinary delights of the world!
Diamond, I can empathise with your mood swings but I am currently on a positive, so I thought I'd post (as Cinamon says, this thread is designed to incite positivity towards eating disorders and as such it's important to take these times to give hope to others). After the constant Twocal and Fortisip guzzlage, a 2000 calorie a day meal plan, and a dose of reality in the form of that phantom heart attack, I am getting close to reaching a BMI of 16 (98lb/7stones)!
Stay positive everyone. The demon wants to use food, your anxieties and fears, use them against you and make you more ill; but think about all of us, think about all of the people who love you, who are there with you, everyone on this forum, then think about your ED over there on the other side all by itself. We are an army and that ED is dwarfed by absolutely everyone in your support network.
I am here, they are here, WE are here for whoever needs that strength.
Post more often people, I need to make sure everyone is okay.
SO MUCH LOVE. XXX
Diamond, I can empathise with your mood swings but I am currently on a positive, so I thought I'd post (as Cinamon says, this thread is designed to incite positivity towards eating disorders and as such it's important to take these times to give hope to others). After the constant Twocal and Fortisip guzzlage, a 2000 calorie a day meal plan, and a dose of reality in the form of that phantom heart attack, I am getting close to reaching a BMI of 16 (98lb/7stones)!
Stay positive everyone. The demon wants to use food, your anxieties and fears, use them against you and make you more ill; but think about all of us, think about all of the people who love you, who are there with you, everyone on this forum, then think about your ED over there on the other side all by itself. We are an army and that ED is dwarfed by absolutely everyone in your support network.
I am here, they are here, WE are here for whoever needs that strength.
Post more often people, I need to make sure everyone is okay.
SO MUCH LOVE. XXX
May you stay this way! xx You can do it! Superman!
Toto,
What an excellent post! You can do this and so can everyone here!
What an excellent post! You can do this and so can everyone here!
Original post by TotoMimo
Custard, I am incredibly proud of you. Food is not the enemy and I bet your tongue is doing a mega-happy-dance at the prospect of all these gorgeous new treats you've been deprived of for so long! Just think - the yummy taste of sponge pudding etc - THAT'S YOUR MEDICINE!! Think of all the poor sods that have painful, disgusting, disorientating treatments, where your medicine is experiencing the culinary delights of the world!
Diamond, I can empathise with your mood swings but I am currently on a positive, so I thought I'd post (as Cinamon says, this thread is designed to incite positivity towards eating disorders and as such it's important to take these times to give hope to others). After the constant Twocal and Fortisip guzzlage, a 2000 calorie a day meal plan, and a dose of reality in the form of that phantom heart attack, I am getting close to reaching a BMI of 16 (98lb/7stones)!
Stay positive everyone. The demon wants to use food, your anxieties and fears, use them against you and make you more ill; but think about all of us, think about all of the people who love you, who are there with you, everyone on this forum, then think about your ED over there on the other side all by itself. We are an army and that ED is dwarfed by absolutely everyone in your support network.
I am here, they are here, WE are here for whoever needs that strength.
Post more often people, I need to make sure everyone is okay.
SO MUCH LOVE. XXX
Diamond, I can empathise with your mood swings but I am currently on a positive, so I thought I'd post (as Cinamon says, this thread is designed to incite positivity towards eating disorders and as such it's important to take these times to give hope to others). After the constant Twocal and Fortisip guzzlage, a 2000 calorie a day meal plan, and a dose of reality in the form of that phantom heart attack, I am getting close to reaching a BMI of 16 (98lb/7stones)!
Stay positive everyone. The demon wants to use food, your anxieties and fears, use them against you and make you more ill; but think about all of us, think about all of the people who love you, who are there with you, everyone on this forum, then think about your ED over there on the other side all by itself. We are an army and that ED is dwarfed by absolutely everyone in your support network.
I am here, they are here, WE are here for whoever needs that strength.
Post more often people, I need to make sure everyone is okay.
SO MUCH LOVE. XXX
****ing love you
Has anyone spoken to Squiff or heard from her? I'm a bit worried because she hasn't posted for a while.
Squiff said that she was going to have to avoid this thread from now on!! Didn't sound too good :s
Squiff said that she was going to have to avoid this thread from now on!! Didn't sound too good :s
Original post by TotoMimo
Custard, I am incredibly proud of you. Food is not the enemy and I bet your tongue is doing a mega-happy-dance at the prospect of all these gorgeous new treats you've been deprived of for so long! Just think - the yummy taste of sponge pudding etc - THAT'S YOUR MEDICINE!! Think of all the poor sods that have painful, disgusting, disorientating treatments, where your medicine is experiencing the culinary delights of the world!
After the constant Twocal and Fortisip guzzlage, a 2000 calorie a day meal plan, and a dose of reality in the form of that phantom heart attack, I am getting close to reaching a BMI of 16 (98lb/7stones)!
After the constant Twocal and Fortisip guzzlage, a 2000 calorie a day meal plan, and a dose of reality in the form of that phantom heart attack, I am getting close to reaching a BMI of 16 (98lb/7stones)!
Haha, you forget about my epic bingeing
. But yeah - eating and keeping somewhat different. And I don't have to pay for this . Yeah, I'm lucky in that most of my 'medicine' isn't too terrible. 
.WELL DONE on the two-cal and forti, and the MP! (feel free to post in my lonely thread haha). I'm really glad you've pulled things together again
.__________________________________
Well, I was weighed, up 0.2kg since Thurs and 0.4kg over the week (well over 2500 and totally sedentary), BMI now up to 14.6 (approaching 15...). Pleased it not rocketing but dreading a potential increase soon as really dont think i could handle - it is getting harder and harder
.Tonight i just cried and cried through tea. I still ate it all though. I've been getting a LOT of support from the patients and staff though - everyone really encouraging.
I have found a cupcake Pandora charm I am going to twist my gran's arm to buy for me when I am free
14.6 is still extremely low please remember that
how long have you been there now?
how long have you been there now?
I think my diet is getting better(my AD's I think are helping) all I ate today was 2/3 a packet of mince with pasta sauce, chillis and a small portion of pasta.
Still not 3 meals a day though! I am trying to lose weight as obese though.
I did have a can of energy drink though which always seems to stop my appetite.
Still not 3 meals a day though! I am trying to lose weight as obese though.
I did have a can of energy drink though which always seems to stop my appetite.
Took the plunge today and had a whole day without coffee - a big step since I used to use it to suppress hunger, and then throughout recovery I've used it as a sort of "full stop" on meals so that I don't binge like a crazylady. Been a bit headachey from the caffeine withdrawal but otherwise feel fine
Original post by Sugarcandy
Has anyone spoken to Squiff or heard from her? I'm a bit worried because she hasn't posted for a while.
Squiff said that she was going to have to avoid this thread from now on!! Didn't sound too good :s
Cinamon said she's made some positive changes so fingers crossed she'll be able to make a flying visit here.
Original post by eleanor_rigby
Took the plunge today and had a whole day without coffee - a big step since I used to use it to suppress hunger, and then throughout recovery I've used it as a sort of "full stop" on meals so that I don't binge like a crazylady. Been a bit headachey from the caffeine withdrawal but otherwise feel fine
Well done.Well, it looks like I finally have a therapist. I'll only be able to have 6 sessions but it's much better than the zero the NHS offered me. I'll see how it goes...
Original post by *custardcream
Haha, you forget about my epic bingeing . But yeah - eating and keeping somewhat different. And I don't have to pay for this . Yeah, I'm lucky in that most of my 'medicine' isn't too terrible. .
WELL DONE on the two-cal and forti, and the MP! (feel free to post in my lonely thread haha). I'm really glad you've pulled things together again.
__________________________________
Well, I was weighed, up 0.2kg since Thurs and 0.4kg over the week (well over 2500 and totally sedentary), BMI now up to 14.6 (approaching 15...). Pleased it not rocketing but dreading a potential increase soon as really dont think i could handle - it is getting harder and harder.
Tonight i just cried and cried through tea. I still ate it all though. I've been getting a LOT of support from the patients and staff though - everyone really encouraging.
I have found a cupcake Pandora charm I am going to twist my gran's arm to buy for me when I am free
. But yeah - eating and keeping somewhat different. And I don't have to pay for this . Yeah, I'm lucky in that most of my 'medicine' isn't too terrible. .WELL DONE on the two-cal and forti, and the MP! (feel free to post in my lonely thread haha). I'm really glad you've pulled things together again
.__________________________________
Well, I was weighed, up 0.2kg since Thurs and 0.4kg over the week (well over 2500 and totally sedentary), BMI now up to 14.6 (approaching 15...). Pleased it not rocketing but dreading a potential increase soon as really dont think i could handle - it is getting harder and harder
.Tonight i just cried and cried through tea. I still ate it all though. I've been getting a LOT of support from the patients and staff though - everyone really encouraging.
I have found a cupcake Pandora charm I am going to twist my gran's arm to buy for me when I am free
14.6 is still "Walking skeleton" territory, but at least it's "walking skeleton with positive attitude" territory!
I'm so glad that you're fighting this m'lovie. at one point I had assumed you'd resorted to the old ways.
To the others currently suffering, you should take this girl as an inspiration. She is literally on the cusp of existence and battling her way back to health.
EDs are a horrid balancing act; the mental and physical aspects need to be addressed in equal measure, and that is FAR easier said than done...
Original post by TotoMimo
14.6 is still "Walking skeleton" territory, but at least it's "walking skeleton with positive attitude" territory!
I'm so glad that you're fighting this m'lovie. at one point I had assumed you'd resorted to the old ways.
To the others currently suffering, you should take this girl as an inspiration. She is literally on the cusp of existence and battling her way back to health.
EDs are a horrid balancing act; the mental and physical aspects need to be addressed in equal measure, and that is FAR easier said than done...
I'm so glad that you're fighting this m'lovie. at one point I had assumed you'd resorted to the old ways.
To the others currently suffering, you should take this girl as an inspiration. She is literally on the cusp of existence and battling her way back to health.
EDs are a horrid balancing act; the mental and physical aspects need to be addressed in equal measure, and that is FAR easier said than done...
To you and everyone else; please stay healthy and positive, 'kay?NotSoCool.Fly - I know it's low, but it's a lot up from where it was, and I'm trying to cope . I've been here 4 weeks now! :O
Toto - you brought tears to my eyes. No, I'm not back to old ways, I'm fighting as hard as I can, I WANT uni to WORK, and I want to ENJOY it too . And I guess I accept that I just WON'T until I'm healthier.
_________________________
Later tonight, it will be an entire 4 weeks since I have engaged in any form of self-destructive behaviour. You may all worship me now *ROFLMAO*
I've had a better day. I reflected on some stuff that was said yesterday about something that's been bothering me, and felt better for it. Food was easier today than other days (banana and icecream at lunch instead of a heavy sponge/pie/crumble) and my mood had lifted from the reflection. I also got let loose with a pair of scissors in a group today and I now have my grown-out fringe back - was sorely missed!
. I've been here 4 weeks now! :OToto - you brought tears to my eyes
. No, I'm not back to old ways, I'm fighting as hard as I can, I WANT uni to WORK, and I want to ENJOY it too . And I guess I accept that I just WON'T until I'm healthier._________________________
Later tonight, it will be an entire 4 weeks since I have engaged in any form of self-destructive behaviour. You may all worship me now
*ROFLMAO*I've had a better day. I reflected on some stuff that was said yesterday about something that's been bothering me, and felt better for it. Food was easier today than other days (banana and icecream at lunch instead of a heavy sponge/pie/crumble) and my mood had lifted from the reflection. I also got let loose with a pair of scissors in a group today and I now have my grown-out fringe back
- was sorely missed!Original post by *custardcream
NotSoCool.Fly - I know it's low, but it's a lot up from where it was, and I'm trying to cope . I've been here 4 weeks now! :O
Toto - you brought tears to my eyes. No, I'm not back to old ways, I'm fighting as hard as I can, I WANT uni to WORK, and I want to ENJOY it too . And I guess I accept that I just WON'T until I'm healthier.
_________________________
Later tonight, it will be an entire 4 weeks since I have engaged in any form of self-destructive behaviour. You may all worship me now *ROFLMAO*
I've had a better day. I reflected on some stuff that was said yesterday about something that's been bothering me, and felt better for it. Food was easier today than other days (banana and icecream at lunch instead of a heavy sponge/pie/crumble) and my mood had lifted from the reflection. I also got let loose with a pair of scissors in a group today and I now have my grown-out fringe back - was sorely missed!
. I've been here 4 weeks now! :OToto - you brought tears to my eyes
. No, I'm not back to old ways, I'm fighting as hard as I can, I WANT uni to WORK, and I want to ENJOY it too . And I guess I accept that I just WON'T until I'm healthier._________________________
Later tonight, it will be an entire 4 weeks since I have engaged in any form of self-destructive behaviour. You may all worship me now
*ROFLMAO*I've had a better day. I reflected on some stuff that was said yesterday about something that's been bothering me, and felt better for it. Food was easier today than other days (banana and icecream at lunch instead of a heavy sponge/pie/crumble) and my mood had lifted from the reflection. I also got let loose with a pair of scissors in a group today and I now have my grown-out fringe back
- was sorely missed!YAY! All hail Fringeycustard! I felt sorry for you with the pie + crumble yesterday, if where you are was as hot as here i.e 30C.
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