Eating Disorders and life with one - Discussions, Opinions, Advice.

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I don't want to ruffle any feathers but nobody should be discouraged from posting here for ANY reason, so long as it's for the purpose of encouraging recovery or asking advice on how to recover from your own eating disorders.

Squiff, I agree with DestroyViruses, you've already taken MANY of the first steps. It gets scarier and steeper from here.

I personally had a "panic week". I was told to eat 2000 calories and drink fortisips on top of that. I did what I was supposed to, but subconsciously sabotaged myself by MAKING reasons to be more active.

"Oh, gran needs shopping done. I'll go get it for her."
"Oh, I need to set up my other gran's new telly."

At my weigh-in today, I've gone from BMI of 15.6 to 15.3 in one week, and that's WITH my new calorie intake. I cried, I had no idea that even despite eating what I was supposed to, I was sabotaging my own recovery through this ED's sneak tactics and my own weak will.

What I'm saying is, your ED is just as sly and as cruel a liar as I, as you, as we all have become. But you're kidding nobody but yourself. I did this to myself. I just conditioned myself to believe that, as I was taking in more cals, that I could "afford" to do more.

But no. I now have a kidney infection, my bone density scan shows severe osteoperosis (SD of -3.6; osteoperosis is diagnosed at -2.5, 1 or more is normal) and I am now in danger of being re-admitted to the hospital against my will.

This is no life. In one week of self-sabotage I have undone a month of progress. Don't fall into the same trap.

I only post this as explicitly as I do because my therapist does the same to me - doesn't dress it up, doesn't pussyfoot around the issue. Everyone needs to understand how tough a recovery can be, but at the end of the day, don't fall into the traps your own lies you make for yourself construct.

You deserve a life beyond this, guys! XXX

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I thought it was a advice thread too? I was wanting help and advice to get better so neg rep isnt the way to do that!

You have to wonder if the people experimented on were able to go back to normal life and having a healthy view of food).

i'm so full i cnt remem re wohat happend rto im to ****ing drunk but imr not eating tmzor thea ry arter i reel rufkd i think i want tto go hopsital bz noting is rogkint but i feel stupid cz imnot actualluy ill i think, i want to kill mhsefl though and i might try ntow whil ei im drunk this cx i know i wont rmemember n thing of this and im gna starve and cutua nd kill

X

X

X

I don't want to ruffle any feathers but nobody should be discouraged from posting here for ANY reason, so long as it's for the purpose of encouraging recovery or asking advice on how to recover from your own eating disorders.

Squiff, I agree with DestroyViruses, you've already taken MANY of the first steps. It gets scarier and steeper from here.

I personally had a "panic week". I was told to eat 2000 calories and drink fortisips on top of that. I did what I was supposed to, but subconsciously sabotaged myself by MAKING reasons to be more active.

"Oh, gran needs shopping done. I'll go get it for her."
"Oh, I need to set up my other gran's new telly."

At my weigh-in today, I've gone from BMI of 15.6 to 15.3 in one week, and that's WITH my new calorie intake. I cried, I had no idea that even despite eating what I was supposed to, I was sabotaging my own recovery through this ED's sneak tactics and my own weak will.

What I'm saying is, your ED is just as sly and as cruel a liar as I, as you, as we all have become. But you're kidding nobody but yourself. I did this to myself. I just conditioned myself to believe that, as I was taking in more cals, that I could "afford" to do more.

But no. I now have a kidney infection, my bone density scan shows severe osteoperosis (SD of -3.6; osteoperosis is diagnosed at -2.5, 1 or more is normal) and I am now in danger of being re-admitted to the hospital against my will.

This is no life. In one week of self-sabotage I have undone a month of progress. Don't fall into the same trap.

I only post this as explicitly as I do because my therapist does the same to me - doesn't dress it up, doesn't pussyfoot around the issue. Everyone needs to understand how tough a recovery can be, but at the end of the day, don't fall into the traps your own lies you make for yourself construct.

You deserve a life beyond this, guys! XXX

i know your not a doctor but i wanted to ask you what i'm meant to be doing. i really struggle with the feeling of being full so i seem to let a normal meal completely get the better of me, i don't know whether what i'm doing to get better is really good enough because i use the whole 'i'm taking it slow' excuse and use it to manipulate situations allowing me to stay the same. the other day when i did pretty well managing to eat often what i ate was so pathetic in terms of calories that i wonder whether it can even mean anything anymore.

am i actually doing the right thing?

xxx

i know your not a doctor but i wanted to ask you what i'm meant to be doing. i really struggle with the feeling of being full so i seem to let a normal meal completely get the better of me, i don't know whether what i'm doing to get better is really good enough because i use the whole 'i'm taking it slow' excuse and use it to manipulate situations allowing me to stay the same. the other day when i did pretty well managing to eat often what i ate was so pathetic in terms of calories that i wonder whether it can even mean anything anymore.

am i actually doing the right thing?

xxx

Have you tried specific number goals? Rather than "I need to eat more" saying "I'm going to eat atleats x calories today and increase that by y tomorow" And make a graph of your weight on excell, aim to put on a certain amount of weight per week and if you cant then increase calories.

xxx

You cant get tricky if you stick with the numbers!

Best Wishes.

I have that in an almost reverse sense, back when I was skinny I used to live off just plain spaghetti and if hungry a slice of bread.

I still get "full" on the same amount of food but feel hungry too so its imbalance of some sort.

I struggle to eat food as I feel full even on a few bites but the hunger is seperate if that makes sense.

Have you tried specific number goals? Rather than "I need to eat more" saying "I'm going to eat atleats x calories today and increase that by y tomorow" And make a graph of your weight on excell, aim to put on a certain amount of weight per week and if you cant then increase calories.

xxx

You cant get tricky if you stick with the numbers!

Best Wishes.

i'm confused, but like if you eat enough then still feel hungry could it be psychological hunger? or do you eat feel full but then feel hungry again soon after? if thats the case maybe your not eating the right sorts of food, like you could eat a bowl of lettuce you'd feel 'full' because your stomach would be, but you wouldn't be full for long because theres not really any stubstance to it or anything to give you more energy and nutrition. if thats the case maybe eat foods that are low on the GI scale because they keep you full for longer, like eggs and apples and fish i think.

xxx

I am bad at working out what is at fault but I do notice certain foods fill me up more in certain ways i.e when I am craving food but not hungry lets say I had mince and tatties I get far less cravings in the late evening(though still snack)

I sort of feel full every bite I eat even if I hadnt eaten that day but I feel my body "filling up" at same time so one part of me is telling me I am full even though I havent eaten and another is saying I need to eat not necessarily that I am hungry

Dont know what I mean in some senses!

Also I think part of it is similar to why I oversleep sometimes in that the first amount of food I eat is just to fill up, then it becomes about eating something I want so should I get rid of the fill up phase then I would be eating a sensible amount of food.

eat regularly throughout the day that way your less likely to binge or crave food at night, even if you don't feel 'starving' in the day still have something, work out the calories so your not over/undereating and stick to it, that way you will know yhour eating the right amount, it'll regulate your eating patterns because if you get used to eating at certain times your body will get hungry or expect food at those times, it'll probably help your sleeping patterns aswell - although oversleeping sounds like heaven to me!! why would you want to stop that?

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Well at one point I was sleeping about 12-16 hours a day but now down to about 10 which means I miss a lot of potential good stuff to do, even if its going on a train to another town and walking around.

I started taking some medication for anxiety 6 weeks ago and it has meant I have stuck at 10 and a half hours sleep a day for some reason and more regular sleep pattern(if anything when I want to go to bed say midnight my body keeps me awake till 3am) which I think is a good sign, the only difference is when it gets to late night I need to snack to keep my energy up so I dont feel dizzy etc.

I do notice when at parents who eat at a set time I lose over a stone in about a week but that creeps back on when I come home.

yeah thats a good idea! i think it'll stop me freaking out about food aswell if its more controled and written down and calculated i think i'll find it easier to rationalise my thoughts and not to do the things i usually seem to do.

xxx

That may help me though, if you think it will but with the intention to lose weight/organise calories.

As in I keep telling myself I need to eat x amount at x time but I struggle to do so which is why I often dont eat till late evening then eat junk to fill up also because my tastebuds are different at night for obv reasons(during the day I crave a nice meal, at night I just want to snack)