A classic 'Does she like me/Should I tell her/How should I tell her' spiel
Some context about me: I am a guy. I am basically a kind of 'in-betweener'; most people probably vaguely like me, but I'm not really very close with anybody. I rarely see people outside of school, but I do speak to quite a few people when I'm at school. I suppose I'm something of a loser but I'm not a complete failure socially. Consequently, I have never had any kind of an emotionally or physically intimate relationship with anybody.
Some context about her: She is amazing. She's absurdly clever, really really nice, and, although not everyone would agree with me, beautiful. As a result, everybody likes her, deservedly. She has a much bigger social life than me; she goes to parties and is always doing things whilst simultaneously getting staggering results. Since the beginning of the year, because we share two classes, we've become friends, and in the last few months I've realised that I have feelings for her. At the beginning of the year she was in a relationship with a guy who is in a similar-ish situation to me, though he probably has a somewhat larger social life than me. She's single now, though, and has been for a number of months.
Because of the shared subjects we see each other at least once every day, and we occasionally bump into each other and have brief chats. Sometimes - when she prompts it - we walk to lessons together. I sit about two seats opposite to her in History since the desks are set up in a kind of C shape so I can't help but, um, look at her from time to time, and occasionally she meets my gaze, and today I noticed that she was looking at me. I don't know if this is simply her happening to stare at me or if she was actually intending to stare at me.
I'm quite friendly with most of her friends, and one of her best friends is my best friend's girlfriend, so I don't know how that changes things.
I'm fairly sure that I'm horribly over-analysing the situation just because I've never really done anything like this before, but does it sound like she likes me or does it sound like she's just being friendly? My major fear is that I build up the confidence to let her know how I feel about her and she doesn't return those feelings and feels sorry for inadvertently leading me on.
Am I being ridiculous? Should I just man up and try to talk to her? What would I say? Or should I slowly and excruciatingly develop our present friendship and then man up? I think I should probably wait until the exam period is over - she works very hard and does five subjects on top of having this busy social and extra-curricular life - so I have a while. I'm sure threads like this are extremely common but I'd really appreciate a little advice, TSR!
(Please keep this anonymous. I'm not sure why people put this at the end of anonymous postings but I won't take any chances...)
Also, sorry for this being so long.
Some context about her: She is amazing. She's absurdly clever, really really nice, and, although not everyone would agree with me, beautiful. As a result, everybody likes her, deservedly. She has a much bigger social life than me; she goes to parties and is always doing things whilst simultaneously getting staggering results. Since the beginning of the year, because we share two classes, we've become friends, and in the last few months I've realised that I have feelings for her. At the beginning of the year she was in a relationship with a guy who is in a similar-ish situation to me, though he probably has a somewhat larger social life than me. She's single now, though, and has been for a number of months.
Because of the shared subjects we see each other at least once every day, and we occasionally bump into each other and have brief chats. Sometimes - when she prompts it - we walk to lessons together. I sit about two seats opposite to her in History since the desks are set up in a kind of C shape so I can't help but, um, look at her from time to time, and occasionally she meets my gaze, and today I noticed that she was looking at me. I don't know if this is simply her happening to stare at me or if she was actually intending to stare at me.
I'm quite friendly with most of her friends, and one of her best friends is my best friend's girlfriend, so I don't know how that changes things.
I'm fairly sure that I'm horribly over-analysing the situation just because I've never really done anything like this before, but does it sound like she likes me or does it sound like she's just being friendly? My major fear is that I build up the confidence to let her know how I feel about her and she doesn't return those feelings and feels sorry for inadvertently leading me on.
Am I being ridiculous? Should I just man up and try to talk to her? What would I say? Or should I slowly and excruciatingly develop our present friendship and then man up? I think I should probably wait until the exam period is over - she works very hard and does five subjects on top of having this busy social and extra-curricular life - so I have a while. I'm sure threads like this are extremely common but I'd really appreciate a little advice, TSR!
(Please keep this anonymous. I'm not sure why people put this at the end of anonymous postings but I won't take any chances...)
Also, sorry for this being so long.
Scroll to see replies
The best thing you can possibly do is tell a girl that you like her in any situation where you like a girl. Seriously.
Honestly, just go up to a couple of girls at school and tell them you like them, or you think they're smart, funny or cute.
The worst that can happen is that your confidence gets knocked and you come back stronger, plus a few months of embarrassment, but hey, that's character defining too! Trust me, been there! It was rather fun.
Do it.
Honestly, just go up to a couple of girls at school and tell them you like them, or you think they're smart, funny or cute.
The worst that can happen is that your confidence gets knocked and you come back stronger, plus a few months of embarrassment, but hey, that's character defining too! Trust me, been there! It was rather fun.
Do it.
Original post by wanderlust.xx
The best thing you can possibly do is tell a girl that you like her in any situation where you like a girl. Seriously.
Honestly, just go up to a couple of girls at school and tell them you like them, or you think they're smart, funny or cute.
The worst that can happen is that your confidence gets knocked and you come back stronger, plus a few months of embarrassment, but hey, that's character defining too! Trust me, been there! It was rather fun.
Do it.
Honestly, just go up to a couple of girls at school and tell them you like them, or you think they're smart, funny or cute.
The worst that can happen is that your confidence gets knocked and you come back stronger, plus a few months of embarrassment, but hey, that's character defining too! Trust me, been there! It was rather fun.
Do it.
Really? I'm concerned that the extremely quick run-up to the very close exam period is not the best time to spring this on her. Surely it would be better to try afterwards when everything is chilled? Open days and things would, I suspect, present great opportunities for that kind of shenanigan.
I'm not too hot about approaching random girls and telling them they're cute. That would just seem creepy coming from someone like me, wouldn't it?
How long are you at school for? Another year? Perhaps even a few months? Pff, doesn't make a difference. You'll thank yourself years later, even if it was torture at the time. I do, I've got no regrets in that department. I told a girl I liked her a month or so before A2 exams. Wasn't a big deal, really.
Original post by wanderlust.xx
How long are you at school for? Another year? Perhaps even a few months? Pff, doesn't make a difference. You'll thank yourself years later, even if it was torture at the time. I do, I've got no regrets in that department. I told a girl I liked her a month or so before A2 exams. Wasn't a big deal, really.
I'm in Year 12, so I've got another year-and-a-bit to go. I can't see any potential relationship lasting after we leave school; we're both almost certainly going to university, and if she goes where she wants to - something, I suspect, is extremely likely - then we'll be a continent apart.
But reading this thread it's become obvious to me that I'm overthinking this and you're right - I should just say something.
This situation seems very similar to the one i'm in, except i'm the girl. Admittedly i'm not the amazingly beautiful girl that she sounds like, but the way you percieve her could be the way people see me i suppose. And the guy i have fancied for ages sounds just like you! So go for it 
Tell her how you feel then ask her out for a coffee or something, but leave it open to her if she wants to leave it til after the exams or not. That way you're showing you respect that idea, even if it turns she doesn't mind taking the time out to socialise even in exam time, which it sounds like she wouldn't if she regularly goes to parties etc.
Or somehow your best friend and his girlfriend could maybe arrange a meet up with you two, the four of you could watch a film or something before you tell her how you feel- you all already get on, and it will set the idea of you two together in her head if the pair of you are with another couple. And that way you can see how she reacts if people jump to conclusions about double dates :P
And don't worry about over analysing things, a lot of people do that- I'm particularly great at it. Good luck
Tell her how you feel then ask her out for a coffee or something, but leave it open to her if she wants to leave it til after the exams or not. That way you're showing you respect that idea, even if it turns she doesn't mind taking the time out to socialise even in exam time, which it sounds like she wouldn't if she regularly goes to parties etc.
Or somehow your best friend and his girlfriend could maybe arrange a meet up with you two, the four of you could watch a film or something before you tell her how you feel- you all already get on, and it will set the idea of you two together in her head if the pair of you are with another couple. And that way you can see how she reacts if people jump to conclusions about double dates :P
And don't worry about over analysing things, a lot of people do that- I'm particularly great at it. Good luck
Original post by Anonymous
This situation seems very similar to the one i'm in, except i'm the girl. Admittedly i'm not the amazingly beautiful girl that she sounds like, but the way you percieve her could be the way people see me i suppose. And the guy i have fancied for ages sounds just like you! So go for it
Tell her how you feel then ask her out for a coffee or something, but leave it open to her if she wants to leave it til after the exams or not. That way you're showing you respect that idea, even if it turns she doesn't mind taking the time out to socialise even in exam time, which it sounds like she wouldn't if she regularly goes to parties etc.
Or somehow your best friend and his girlfriend could maybe arrange a meet up with you two, the four of you could watch a film or something before you tell her how you feel- you all already get on, and it will set the idea of you two together in her head if the pair of you are with another couple. And that way you can see how she reacts if people jump to conclusions about double dates :P
And don't worry about over analysing things, a lot of people do that- I'm particularly great at it. Good luck
Tell her how you feel then ask her out for a coffee or something, but leave it open to her if she wants to leave it til after the exams or not. That way you're showing you respect that idea, even if it turns she doesn't mind taking the time out to socialise even in exam time, which it sounds like she wouldn't if she regularly goes to parties etc.
Or somehow your best friend and his girlfriend could maybe arrange a meet up with you two, the four of you could watch a film or something before you tell her how you feel- you all already get on, and it will set the idea of you two together in her head if the pair of you are with another couple. And that way you can see how she reacts if people jump to conclusions about double dates :P
And don't worry about over analysing things, a lot of people do that- I'm particularly great at it. Good luck
Haha, you don't have a first name that begins with an 'F' but is normally shortened to one that begins with a 'C' do you?
I'm going to talk to her alone somehow when we're back in school on Tuesday. I think I just want to rip the plaster off quickly now.
That idea about the four of us going out is fun. I will consider it, or at least ask my friend what his advice would be - he and his girlfriend were in a pretty similar situation to the one me and the person I'm interested in are in before getting together, so he might have some interesting insights.
Haha no, but honestly reading that post if History hadn't been mentioned, it's could have been my situation reversed, including the best friend boyfriend is his best friend.
Well best of luck
Well best of luck
OK, here's what's happened: I haven't asked her out or told her I liked her but got progressively closer to her. I now have her phone number and we've been having a banterous text conversation for two days now; also been talking to her more on FB chat. My exams are entirely over now and hers don't continue for a while. I'm probably going to ask her out at some point in the half term. Questions: would a 'first date' to see the latest Pirates of the Caribbean film be acceptable? She's a big fan of the franchise so I know she'd enjoy it, but would it make for a good date? Would getting lunch somewhere be better? Also, is it ok to ask her out over the phone? We're not going to see each other again until the 10th of June when school resumes.
Ta.
Ta.
Original post by Anonymous
Some context about me: I am a guy. I am basically a kind of 'in-betweener'; most people probably vaguely like me, but I'm not really very close with anybody. I rarely see people outside of school, but I do speak to quite a few people when I'm at school. I suppose I'm something of a loser but I'm not a complete failure socially. Consequently, I have never had any kind of an emotionally or physically intimate relationship with anybody.
Some context about her: She is amazing. She's absurdly clever, really really nice, and, although not everyone would agree with me, beautiful. As a result, everybody likes her, deservedly. She has a much bigger social life than me; she goes to parties and is always doing things whilst simultaneously getting staggering results. Since the beginning of the year, because we share two classes, we've become friends, and in the last few months I've realised that I have feelings for her. At the beginning of the year she was in a relationship with a guy who is in a similar-ish situation to me, though he probably has a somewhat larger social life than me. She's single now, though, and has been for a number of months.
Because of the shared subjects we see each other at least once every day, and we occasionally bump into each other and have brief chats. Sometimes - when she prompts it - we walk to lessons together. I sit about two seats opposite to her in History since the desks are set up in a kind of C shape so I can't help but, um, look at her from time to time, and occasionally she meets my gaze, and today I noticed that she was looking at me. I don't know if this is simply her happening to stare at me or if she was actually intending to stare at me.
I'm quite friendly with most of her friends, and one of her best friends is my best friend's girlfriend, so I don't know how that changes things.
I'm fairly sure that I'm horribly over-analysing the situation just because I've never really done anything like this before, but does it sound like she likes me or does it sound like she's just being friendly? My major fear is that I build up the confidence to let her know how I feel about her and she doesn't return those feelings and feels sorry for inadvertently leading me on.
Am I being ridiculous? Should I just man up and try to talk to her? What would I say? Or should I slowly and excruciatingly develop our present friendship and then man up? I think I should probably wait until the exam period is over - she works very hard and does five subjects on top of having this busy social and extra-curricular life - so I have a while. I'm sure threads like this are extremely common but I'd really appreciate a little advice, TSR!
(Please keep this anonymous. I'm not sure why people put this at the end of anonymous postings but I won't take any chances...)
Also, sorry for this being so long.
Some context about her: She is amazing. She's absurdly clever, really really nice, and, although not everyone would agree with me, beautiful. As a result, everybody likes her, deservedly. She has a much bigger social life than me; she goes to parties and is always doing things whilst simultaneously getting staggering results. Since the beginning of the year, because we share two classes, we've become friends, and in the last few months I've realised that I have feelings for her. At the beginning of the year she was in a relationship with a guy who is in a similar-ish situation to me, though he probably has a somewhat larger social life than me. She's single now, though, and has been for a number of months.
Because of the shared subjects we see each other at least once every day, and we occasionally bump into each other and have brief chats. Sometimes - when she prompts it - we walk to lessons together. I sit about two seats opposite to her in History since the desks are set up in a kind of C shape so I can't help but, um, look at her from time to time, and occasionally she meets my gaze, and today I noticed that she was looking at me. I don't know if this is simply her happening to stare at me or if she was actually intending to stare at me.
I'm quite friendly with most of her friends, and one of her best friends is my best friend's girlfriend, so I don't know how that changes things.
I'm fairly sure that I'm horribly over-analysing the situation just because I've never really done anything like this before, but does it sound like she likes me or does it sound like she's just being friendly? My major fear is that I build up the confidence to let her know how I feel about her and she doesn't return those feelings and feels sorry for inadvertently leading me on.
Am I being ridiculous? Should I just man up and try to talk to her? What would I say? Or should I slowly and excruciatingly develop our present friendship and then man up? I think I should probably wait until the exam period is over - she works very hard and does five subjects on top of having this busy social and extra-curricular life - so I have a while. I'm sure threads like this are extremely common but I'd really appreciate a little advice, TSR!
(Please keep this anonymous. I'm not sure why people put this at the end of anonymous postings but I won't take any chances...)
Also, sorry for this being so long.
*stairs
*radiculous
Honestly I am just about sick and tired of people like you that can't respect our language. Learn to spell and use grammer before you use these forum.
Original post by Anonymous
OK, here's what's happened: I haven't asked her out or told her I liked her but got progressively closer to her. I now have her phone number and we've been having a banterous text conversation for two days now; also been talking to her more on FB chat. My exams are entirely over now and hers don't continue for a while. I'm probably going to ask her out at some point in the half term. Questions: would a 'first date' to see the latest Pirates of the Caribbean film be acceptable? She's a big fan of the franchise so I know she'd enjoy it, but would it make for a good date? Would getting lunch somewhere be better? Also, is it ok to ask her out over the phone? We're not going to see each other again until the 10th of June when school resumes.
Ta.
Ta.
do that! cinema is the best because she'll be interested in going and no awkward silences because after you talk about the film
sounds perfect to me.Original post by Economister
*stairs
*radiculous
Honestly I am just about sick and tired of people like you that can't respect our language. Learn to spell and use grammer before you use these forum.
*radiculous
Honestly I am just about sick and tired of people like you that can't respect our language. Learn to spell and use grammer before you use these forum.
this made me laugh! is it supposed to be ironic?
Original post by Economister
*stairs
*radiculous
Honestly I am just about sick and tired of people like you that can't respect our language. Learn to spell and use grammer before you use these forum.
*radiculous
Honestly I am just about sick and tired of people like you that can't respect our language. Learn to spell and use grammer before you use these forum.
I think you're the retarded one. He did it all right. Everyone neg this guy!
Original post by PopABottle
I think you're the retarded one. He did it all right. Everyone neg this guy!
Excuse me but I think I'd know since I'm studying PPE at Cambridge.
Original post by Economister
Excuse me but I think I'd know since I'm studying PPE at Cambridge.
Now I understand...
You're just a stupid bigot.
Original post by PopABottle
Now I understand...
You're just a stupid bigot.
You're just a stupid bigot.
How many A*s did you get at GCSE btw?
...exactly. Mate I would get back to studying if I were you.
Original post by Anonymous
I'm quite friendly with most of her friends, and one of her best friends is my best friend's girlfriend, so I don't know how that changes things.
Whut
Original post by Economister
How many A*s did you get at GCSE btw?
...exactly. Mate I would get back to studying if I were you.
...exactly. Mate I would get back to studying if I were you.
You're radiculous.
Also OP, tell her that you're going to town to pick some stuff up and she should tag-along with you.
Casual outing to the both of you
Escalate
????
Profit!
Original post by Blazara
Whut
Good call I guess. Not really that close to anyone but him.
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