2nd year breakdown

I wanted to post this here as I feel I may not get any helpful responses in the health forum, no offence to the posters there.

I am in my 2nd year of a Sociology degree, I have excelled and secured top marks for all of my work so far but in the last month I have completely fallen to pieces.

My brother died at Christmas very unexpectedly and it is only really starting to sink in now, I spent the months after his death pouring all of my energy in to taking care of my family (emotionally...) and doing my uni assignments. I intend to go on to post grad study in research methods so my degree means everything to me. I have been perfectly able to do my work up until now and I have really enjoyed some of the work this year, but now when I am literally two weeks away from the end of my last term I can't do the work at all.

I have terrible insomnia and anxiety, I literally start the work and my mind goes blank. It is an independent research project which I must admit I have no enthusiasm for, I also have a couple of essays overdue. I can't sleep at night, all I think about is the work. Usually when I feel this way I can just churn the work out with some extra effort but this is the first time since I started my course that I can not physically bring myself to do it.

I have spoken to my tutors about it but for some reason I seem to then kick myself out of it during the conversation, I'll trivialise my feelings and just say I'll get on with it. Has anyone else ever done this? I am confident that I am one of the best students on the course and I feel that I use this against myself, I am not letting myself admit defeat?? I am 24 years old and have never felt so useless. I know I am intelligent and more than capable of producing great work but I just can't do it, I feel like I have some sort of disability??

Does anyone else understand this? Is this normal if you are grieving??

Thanks

Thank you, I just feel like because I've held it together for 6 months that there is no good reason for me to fall apart now. It does not make sense to me why it is happening now, I hate grieving it is actually crippling me mentally. I just thought it was meant to get better and not worse, I really am confused by it all.

I have 3 more assignments, to me they seem so small but I can't get my head round them. I feel like I'm going insane. I e-mailed my tutor to explain so hopefully he will understand, I think he will they have been very kind. They have high expectations of me and that is great, it makes me feel really happy but I have ended up ignoring my grief to meet these expectations, I just don't see why I can't hold off for another month. It's like my brain is telling me to just get on with it and my body is just saying go to sleep! I hope it passes soon it is so depressing.