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Guys, how is a girl to know if you're really into her?

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    How are girls meant to know that a guy isn't just after sex? Obviously I don't want to have to wait long enough for us both to get bored, but in general, if a guy has stuck around for 3 months, does that eliminate the chance he might have just wanted sex and nothing more? A lot of my friends' boyfriends have dumped them soon after they decided to go all the way with them. My friends may have just been unlucky / gone for the wrong kinda guys. I'm not a feminist, but it has got me thinking.
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    Generally if they've stuck around for an undefined period of time without any kind of sexual contact, it would suggest they were after something more.

    Can never be sure anyway.
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    If she can take 3 fingers, she's ready for your man stick.

    It's the unwritten rule my friend.
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    There is no period of time that a man will not endure in order to have sex with someone he finds really attractive.

    That being said it could also be love, or whatever.
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    (Original post by Aack)
    If she can take 3 fingers, she's ready for your man stick.

    It's the unwritten rule my friend.
    But you just wrote it...
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    (Original post by Aack)
    If she can take 3 fingers, she's ready for your man stick.

    It's the unwritten rule my friend.
    What does that even mean? How does that prove a guy wants a girl for more than just sex?
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    I don't think it is really something anyone could tell you because it depends on the individual. A guy could just be a really good player or he could be truly interested in you. I think you would know if you've experienced an ******* before though, and if you've experienced a good guy who's really keen on you; you'll see the difference . I think if a guy is really into you though and not just telling you what he thinks you want to hear so he can get into your knickers, then it will probably be more subtle stuff, like he's always there for you when you need him and he is your best friend as well as your boyfriend.
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    I think the best way to tell a guy isnt just after sex is to make him wait ages for it, thats what my best friend did, she was seeing him sbout 7/8 months and used to sleep at his all the time spend all day every day together but didnt have sex with him. Although thats a bit extreme I wouldnt make someone wait months but I guess at least she was sure! 3 months is probably long enough I guess, depends a bit on age though as 3 months for someone really young isnt that long.

    If the guy is really forward really early on then that suggests he is only after sex.
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    (Original post by Ali.R)
    I think the best way to tell a guy isnt just after sex is to make him wait ages for it, thats what my best friend did, she was seeing him sbout 7/8 months and used to sleep at his all the time spend all day every day together but didnt have sex with him. Although thats a bit extreme I wouldnt make someone wait months but I guess at least she was sure! 3 months is probably long enough I guess, depends a bit on age though as 3 months for someone really young isnt that long.

    If the guy is really forward really early on then that suggests he is only after sex.
    No. Some guys may be purposely very careful, but if a man sees something he likes, he wants to touch it. Guys think sex first, whether he wants you as a girlfriend comes after. At least when you're at an age where people are sexually active (not a teenager anymore), it's normal to have sex when the attraction is there. If I was a man I'd find it a turn off if a girl was withholding sex in a secret attempt to fool me into commitment. A guy is supposed to get horny when he's with you, he's supposed to want to get you to bed.
    If he doesn't call you again after sex, it's most likely because:
    - the sex wasn't very good
    - he never liked you to begin with, and you wouldn't have a shot at being a couple anyway
    - he is not looking for commitment; not with you or anyone else. Again, nothing you could do about it.
    A guy can dump you when he's slept with you once or when he's slept with you 10 times. The only reason to find out if sex is all he wants...is to f*** him. Just make sure it's a good lay and you're golden either way.
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    (Original post by Artvandelay)
    No. Some guys may be purposely very careful, but if a man sees something he likes, he wants to touch it. Guys think sex first, whether he wants you as a girlfriend comes after. At least when you're at an age where people are sexually active (not a teenager anymore), it's normal to have sex when the attraction is there. If I was a man I'd find it a turn off if a girl was withholding sex in a secret attempt to fool me into commitment. A guy is supposed to get horny when he's with you, he's supposed to want to get you to bed.
    If he doesn't call you again after sex, it's most likely because:
    - the sex wasn't very good
    - he never liked you to begin with, and you wouldn't have a shot at being a couple anyway
    - he is not looking for commitment; not with you or anyone else. Again, nothing you could do about it.
    A guy can dump you when he's slept with you once or when he's slept with you 10 times. The only reason to find out if sex is all he wants...is to f*** him. Just make sure it's a good lay and you're golden either way.
    I feel kind of sorry for you. You are not some sort of guinea pig that guys can try out and forget. There is no reason that makes it okay for a guy to have sex with you and not call you. All above reasons are not cool. And I find it sad that you are just expecting this and you're okay with it. Demand better for yourself and raise your standards woman.
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    (Original post by the cake lady)
    I feel kind of sorry for you. You are not some sort of guinea pig that guys can try out and forget. There is no reason that makes it okay for a guy to have sex with you and not call you. All above reasons are not cool. And I find it sad that you are just expecting this and you're okay with it. Demand better for yourself and raise your standards woman.
    Casual sex is normal - it's not the 1950s. Sometimes men and women get together for sex with that being the only reason. You have to find a way to understand that.

    Personally, I've never had a man not contact me after sex. Maybe because we had a connection first, maybe because it was good sex. After all, I'm not a virgin and I know what I'm doing.
    I'm saying this to women who sit and cry if they never had any response. It doesn't have to be you - the rest of the world have casual sex and if he saw this as a brief encounter, there is nothing you can do about it. You can wish back to the times when men had to marry you to go to bed with you, or you can deal with the world as it is.
    I'm not saying all men are a******* or that you should accept bad behavior. But if you go to bed with a man and you lay there like a sack of potatoes...well, I wouldn't call you.

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Updated: August 14, 2011
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