The Student Room Group

Quiet guys - how to approach you?!

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Original post by Anonymous
Meh, Facebook's overrated. I deleted mine :biggrin:


I was just too lazy tbh setting it up looking overwhelming. I only have people from my uni I actually hang out with every week (outside of term week) and a couple of close friends, so my friend list is only like 30 people. I don't really look at status updates I just use the "event" feature as it's good for planning outtings, though a few people don't have facebook so I text a good deal to organise things.
Original post by Anonymous
If he does, I wouldn't mind if he saw this thread...haha, but he doesn't even have a Facebook, so I doubt it.





We had a halfday today so art was a bit of a blur and I didn't get a chance to approach him.

BUT. He's usually wandering around the halls before school, and he was today, and I was coming out of the bathroom with my friends while he was passing by. He stopped, turned, looked at me, and then kept walking! Suppose that means anything? Or am I reading too far into things...


Yes it does! :smile: It's hardly a suprise he didn't stop and talk to you if you're with your friends but that's a really good sign.

This thread is lovely to read btw. Please keep us informed.
Reply 62
Original post by Anonymous

Original post by Anonymous
Oh, you're in the same sort of boat? Do tell! Who's the boy?


lol ok, but i dont want to steal your story!! :wink:
I'll make it quick and short.. So basically theres this guy in my biology class and and he's also quiet and to himself, and i think he's really attractive. It is quite awkward atm to just go up to him in class, but yesturday our eyes met and he sort of had this half smile thing going on. That is pretty much it though, as it's still early days :wink:
Reply 63
Original post by deltabomber

Original post by deltabomber
You cant steal the advice without sharing the story...o.k so you can.... but tell us more!!


theres a quick story above :P
Reply 64
Original post by xPacey
lol ok, but i dont want to steal your story!! :wink:
I'll make it quick and short.. So basically theres this guy in my biology class and and he's also quiet and to himself, and i think he's really attractive. It is quite awkward atm to just go up to him in class, but yesturday our eyes met and he sort of had this half smile thing going on. That is pretty much it though, as it's still early days :wink:


Omg, you sound just like me! At least your guy smiles at you, haha. And I know exactly what you mean, how it's awkward to just go up to him. If he weren't so quiet it'd be easy, but it's so awkward to say something and just stand there while he does his own thing!

...Which is what happened today. I asked him if he was done with his drawing, he said yes, I said it looked really nice, and he continued doodling without even glancing at me. And then I went to the library to finish up calculus homework during lunch and saw him sitting at the table opposite (now I know where he disappears to during lunch...:colone:), and a few seconds after I sat down he got up and left :confused: He is frustrating.
Reply 65
Original post by Anonymous
Omg, you sound just like me! At least your guy smiles at you, haha. And I know exactly what you mean, how it's awkward to just go up to him. If he weren't so quiet it'd be easy, but it's so awkward to say something and just stand there while he does his own thing!

...Which is what happened today. I asked him if he was done with his drawing, he said yes, I said it looked really nice, and he continued doodling without even glancing at me. And then I went to the library to finish up calculus homework during lunch and saw him sitting at the table opposite (now I know where he disappears to during lunch...:colone:), and a few seconds after I sat down he got up and left :confused: He is frustrating.


This thread is just too interesting. :tongue:

This guy sounds very tricky, but I don't think it's because he's not interested in you. I think you have to bite the bullet and ask him if he could help you with a piece of work, say maths or science. That way you'll be able to spend time with him and he'll know beforehand. You've just gotta get him where it's just the two of you.
As a very shy, awkward guy myself, I can tell you that he's going to try anything to keep away from entering an awkward situation. So if you ask him for his help, don't be put off if he seems to not want to help you, he's probably just too scared to do it. You do need to make him feel comfortable around you and it seems that what you're doing right now is going to help build his confidence around you. This will take a LONG time, but with patience, he'll probably eventually be comfortable to spend some time with you..
Original post by Anonymous
Omg, you sound just like me! At least your guy smiles at you, haha. And I know exactly what you mean, how it's awkward to just go up to him. If he weren't so quiet it'd be easy, but it's so awkward to say something and just stand there while he does his own thing!

...Which is what happened today. I asked him if he was done with his drawing, he said yes, I said it looked really nice, and he continued doodling without even glancing at me. And then I went to the library to finish up calculus homework during lunch and saw him sitting at the table opposite (now I know where he disappears to during lunch...:colone:), and a few seconds after I sat down he got up and left :confused: He is frustrating.


No offence, but i bet his ability to avoid social interation wears you down first :smile:
Reply 68
I wonder how long OP will go on...
Reply 69
I'd say kiss him but then again you are in high school. chat to him but when you speak to him touch him (like his arm or something). make sure you are not friend zoned.
Reply 70
Original post by deltabomber
No offence, but i bet his ability to avoid social interation wears you down first :smile:


If I think I've got even a tiny chance with him, I'll keep on. The thought of being able to actually converse with him is lovely :biggrin:

But if it feels like I'm just bothering him, then you're probably right...
Reply 71
Your advice is to go up and kiss him?! Haha, that should work! :tongue:
Reply 72
Original post by Anonymous
But were you bordering on anti-social? I'd be a bit more confident if he was just, you know, shy, but he doesn't even seem interested. I've talked to people at lunch who apparently asked them to sit with them because they felt bad for him sitting all alone - he either said "No" coldly or entirely ignored them.

Think he'd still be open to my approaches? Perhaps he just waved off those other kids out of pride, I'd understand that. And thanks for any advice, I know you don't know me or this boy but I appreciate it.



I was exactly the same...Lots of reasons: I school joined late and felt left out bcause evryone lready knew each other, so I thought it would be safer to create a false confidence , by isolating and pretending to not be bothered by it/ it was just easier than having to go through the tough process of getting to know everyone, whih is even harder when ur naturally shy.. I'm not saying he'll have the same reasons, but just saying there could be anything behind his "anti-sociability",,, anyway during that time there was also a girl who used to smile and try to talk to me a lot, & i actually had a massive crush on her, but i wouldnt let my defence down, stupidly... about a year on Id changed loadss, as happens during ur teens, the girl was in her final year so had already left, but i ran into her again at a really close friend's party, who happened to be close friends with her too, but id never known..anyway I told my friend after about her & how i knew her, & she said that she knew & theyd been talking about me.. and shed said that she atually had a huge crush on me, to my absolute suprise..even though i then noticed how obvious it had been...... long stories aside, id love to talk to this guy & tell him to wake up & see the signs a bit more and not make the same mistake as me.. all i can do is give advice.. it doesnt matter how obvious u think ur being, keep trying, itll be worth it, im sure hes an awsome guy..also, something someone else said & was perfect, cnt remember the posters name though... ask him for his number and txt him, itll let u get to actually know him as he'll feel calm and able to talk with you
good luck :smile:
He might be alarmed yes, but it will be a lot more difficult for him to approach you so if you really want something to come of it, then you will have to make the first move.
Reply 74
Original post by deltabomber
No offence, but i bet his ability to avoid social interation wears you down first :smile:



Original post by Hey TSR
I wonder how long OP will go on...


I did sort of give up on him over the weekend and went into art class today without any expectations. (I should add I'd also forgotten how cute he was over the weekend :redface:)

BUT. Okay so we had a test today (in art class, go figure) and it was in the form of a crossword puzzle. I finished mine really quickly - all the kids at our table pretty much cheated off each other :tongue: - and noticed he'd only gotten one or two done. The teacher was coming round to collect them whether we were finished or not, so I asked "Thomas" if he wanted me to help him finish.

HE SAID YES!!! :biggrin:

I did them for him really fast with my friend whilst the teacher was approaching, and then handed it back. My friend later told me Thomas said thank you, very quietly, but I didn't hear :frown: Wish I could've told him you're welcome, but at least he said thank you this time! Anyway, I'm just thrilled I got to interact with him, even if it was a tiny thing. And I saved him a bad grade, poor darling.
Original post by Anonymous
I did sort of give up on him over the weekend and went into art class today without any expectations. (I should add I'd also forgotten how cute he was over the weekend :redface:)

BUT. Okay so we had a test today (in art class, go figure) and it was in the form of a crossword puzzle. I finished mine really quickly - all the kids at our table pretty much cheated off each other :tongue: - and noticed he'd only gotten one or two done. The teacher was coming round to collect them whether we were finished or not, so I asked "Thomas" if he wanted me to help him finish.

HE SAID YES!!! :biggrin:

I did them for him really fast with my friend whilst the teacher was approaching, and then handed it back. My friend later told me Thomas said thank you, very quietly, but I didn't hear :frown: Wish I could've told him you're welcome, but at least he said thank you this time! Anyway, I'm just thrilled I got to interact with him, even if it was a tiny thing. And I saved him a bad grade, poor darling.


You had a crossword in your art class? Standards are definitely slipping.
Are you on the same table as him in art?
Reply 76
Original post by deltabomber
You had a crossword in your art class? Standards are definitely slipping.
Are you on the same table as him in art?


Yes, we're on the same table. (As for the crossword, we had a sub today so we couldn't work on our projects. It was actually pretty tricky; pop quiz on all these technical terms).
Original post by Anonymous
Yes, we're on the same table. (As for the crossword, we had a sub today so we couldn't work on our projects. It was actually pretty tricky; pop quiz on all these technical terms).


At least now you know he not being rude to others on purpose...
Reply 78
Now, ask for his number, tell him you like him, ask him out...whatever you do, its time to step things up and go for it :colondollar:
Reply 79
Original post by Itdib
Now, ask for his number, tell him you like him, ask him out...whatever you do, its time to step things up and go for it :colondollar:


Righto :biggrin:

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