[Sazzy890]

Your wish is granted but you become malnourished as a result of eating the same thing all the time and die.

I wish I could look sexier and toned without doing any exercise

[Willum Infanta]

You already do

Wish granted, but this strange phenomenon makes you smell horrible

I wish beeninetytwo loved me

[Sazzy890]

Granted but then some vindictive bugger comes along and tries to make her hate you and she falls for it

I wish I was a child again

[james.h]

Granted, but you return to childhood complete with all the memories and knowledge you have now, and as a result can't fully enjoy the experience.

I wish I could conjure yummy cakes out of thin air.

[Sazzy890]

God that sounds rubbish

Granted but they would be so yummy that you would never get a look in because everyone else would eat them before you had a chance

I wish I could party all night and sleep all day and throw all of my problems away

[Jonah Ramone]

Granted, but then you would live a sad and lonely existence out of the reach of normal humanity thus causing all new problems for yourself.

I wish I had the strength of one hundred men.

[Sazzy890]

Granted but then everytime you touched anything delicate it would break, and little animals die

I wish I could watch eastenders back to back whenever I demanded including future episodes that haven't been broadcast

[Gambit791]

Granted but the temptation to watch the last ever episode becomes too much so you watch and the whole show is ruined for you and you become sad.

I wish I was a pineapple.

[TheCrackInTime]

Granted, but a sponge has carved out your insides and is living inside of you.

I wish I had a real TARDIS.

[Gambit791]

Granted, but your arch-nemesis steals it from you and creates a Paradox Machine, putting the Universe at serious risk of collapse.

I wish I could leap tall buildings in a single bound.

[Willum Infanta]

Granted but you always pull all the muscles in your legs when you do it

I wish I was a really good singer

[Sazzy890]

Not sure what the corruption was there?

Granted but you are so good that you become so famous no one ever leaves you alone, even when you're on the toilet you're interrupted and any girlfriend you get will be stupidly jealous of your fans.

I wish I had an unlimited supply of coca-cola

[Gambit791]

Granted, but it rots your teeth so you become all gummy.

I wish I wish I wish I was a fish.

[Dastrea]

Granted! The heat from the making you a fish dried up your water making you a fish in a dried pond.

I wish I had better grades! :P

[Jonah Ramone]

Granted, but you can never use TSR again

I wish I could sleep for 100 years and not have aged a day upon waking.

[Gambit791]

Granted but all your family and friends are dead.

I wish I could breathe fire.

[Jonah Ramone]

I could live with that

Granted but you will never able to be intimate with another human being ever again. Also, almost as importantly, you can't eat ice cream anymore.

I wish I had x-ray vision.

[IxI_Rhys_IxI]

Granted, but you're forced to wear full-lead glasses, therefore rendering it useless.

I wish my new earphones would come in the post now (I'm dying without my music )

[supersteve64]

granted but you music is randomly deleted
i wish i was a slug

[Gambit791]

Granted, but a terrible person salts you and you shrivel up into a withered mass.

I wish the sun would come out.