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Who only sees their boyfriend/girlfriend at weekends?

I've just finished uni and my boyfriend and I have both had to move back home for financial reasons. He doesn't live too far away, about 45 minutes on the train. But we both work full time and so can't really see each other in the week. We've been together for 2 years and have a solid relationship. But we've always been able to see each other whenever we want and i'm finding it hard to adjust to. It's not just about being able to see him, it's being able to fit in other things like seeing other friends from uni who no longer live near me. I don't want to turn into someone who spends every weekend with her boyfriend and forgets about people who've been my best friends for 3 years, but by the time Friday comes around, I just want to see him. Who is in this sort of situation? How do you get your balance?

Reply 1

scribble_girl

I'm in this position at the moment ... *hovers and hopes someone comes up with an answer*

Sorry I don't have the answer OP, but I feel your pain :hugs:

Reply 2

History123

I see my girlfriend every saturday when were at uni (we both live 10mins from eachother but were both so busy with uni work). Normally for like 6 hours, and i don't mind it, i have something to look forward to saturday for. In the holidays we see eachother 2/3 times a week, so you also look forward to that. Once youve done it for a few months it becomes alright. Just hard listening to other people say oh yeah ive seen my gf every day this week

Reply 3

strawberry

I WAS in this situation - we have now moved in together so I see him every day :smile:

For the first 1.5 years of our relationship, he lived across the street from my dorm, so we could see each other often. Then he graduated, and I could only see him over the weekends, your situation :smile:

I think what made it bearable was that we both were so busy when we were apart, though we missed each other, we just looked forward to when we would see each other again. Work and school filled up the other times.

Reply 4

kat91s

I've been in this situation and regret that I neglected spending time with my friends, because I ended up missing having my own social life. Why don't you make it every two weeks? That gives you both enough time to do your own thing on alternate weekends. It might seem like cutting your time together down by a lot, but I wish it's what I had done when I was at uni while my boyfriend lived 2 hours away.

Reply 5

History123

Original post by kat91s

Or just one day of the weekend..

Reply 6

kat91s

Original post by History123

Or just one day of the weekend..

That would be twice the travel...

And when you're travelling 2 hours there and back, just for a day, it's not really worth it.

Reply 7

History123

Original post by kat91s

That would be twice the travel...

And when you're travelling 2 hours there and back, just for a day, it's not really worth it.

Its not worth the money to see your boyfriend?

Reply 8

strawberry

Original post by History123

Its not worth the money to see your boyfriend?

I would say as students, you don't have that kind of money to spend on such a short time together with long travel time. Every other weekend for the whole weekend I say is good enough :smile:

I mean, read the first sentence: "Financial reasons".

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 9

kat91s

Original post by History123

Its not worth the money to see your boyfriend?

I still pay the exact same money to see him. It's tiring making a 2 hour train journey, and I would rather wait another week and have more time to spend with him. I just don't think seeing my boyfriend is worth wearing myself out and losing out on enjoying my own time for.

Reply 10

Anonymous #2

I'm dealing with exactly the same situation. We're both too busy to see each other during the week as we're at unis two hours away. My boyfriend's also at Cambridge so he spends hours and hours working, especially at the weekend. We originally decided to see each other every two weeks which we have been doing but the two weeks in between are so so painful and I spend at least 3 hours a day in tears on the phone to him. I also haven't made many close friends here so I was thinking maybe I could see him every weekend until I do and until there's a desire to spend a weekend at uni with my friends. He doesn't think this is right though and thinks we're never going to settle into our universities if we spend every weekend together, I know he's right but seeing him once a fortnight is honestly killing me! :frown:

Reply 11

emzstuff

I'm in this situation at the moment :smile:

Me and my bf go to different uni's which is only 45-50mins away.

We both are at home for the 1st year, but we rarely get to spend any evenings together in the week :'( (even though we live 10-15 mins away from each other when at home)
But..We do sometimes have Thursdays off, so I go see him at home and we try to make the most of personal days off in the week when do :smile:

But we mostly see/spend time together Saturday and Sunday.
And it's also really nice too, as you haven't seen them in the week :smile:

I personally do wish we could spend time together more, but At the moment, were just getting used to uni and just seeing each other on weekend and hopefully further on we can start hopefully spending more time when get more days off.

We also talk every evening :smile:

so I guess I shouldn't moan as some people do have worse then me :smile:

But yeah I understand you :smile:

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How did it turn out?

I see her everyday now cos we shack up together. But when we didn't live together it was like a few times a week and there was a natural between with being with our mates at the weekend or each other. However even whilst living with each other, we barely have time for each other lately.