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Please read my poems, need constructive criticism.

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    My latest masterpiece:
    Do not drink and smoke
    When the list of products
    The Kitchen Sink
    Was
    Very
    Read more
    Best cooked or raw pork EW
    Tree, but the hair
    Welcome to our beautiful
    George Forty, and may be punishable
    My urine is the best
    Therefore, you should kiss her a lot of the
    OK to tap cowboys
    Oh, just an orgasm
    And really big fasaming
    I have a more
    The network will be based on sound
    I do not know, but his motive
    Julia is the best test I
    And this would be a mistake
    All
    Hi, I have a yew
    See
    I worked on the bird
    Yes, I believe it is. "
    Priceless is the fact that I need to supply oil to the water

    The first ever poem I wrote: (I think I was 6 and 3 quarters)
    In July a big appetite.
    Cake me, their headquarters is in a meeting of the floor,
    I start work on the influence of
    Up and whip it - many
    It has a wild leaves and drinks, Saturday,
    Engine can eat a pie dish Juicy
    Seeds planted in the gears
    The Spirit of God to increase sperm
    He was furious, and dance to the
    He has a good case in ',' Hey, I saw Fred
    Honey me and the excise on the production anginose
    Rolled in the same breath, he was rich from the aghatava
    Rich kourt open up my heart
    Nyameun Day day, it was in my mind
    Speakers begin to fart
    Fred Ritchie is blown, gas, and is therefore a bad idea
    Fred, Gail Flo out of his ass in the country
    There are ways to eat raw Lucy pm
    Angina Fat makes you keep
    Gail in the future, such as oil, are accepted
    When you boil water in the start of the bad
    And all the food in July

    Please let me know what you think
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    My name is Harry, until my son. For I know my body. For it is not me and my son. And I in the prison. I think defeated. Barack Obama and get Read More profound alarm. Cursed is the earth and spit on a lost sheep. That's interesting. I think the effect of disease. Hit me in the head and leg pass away, but I went, and went out. Of food and some are wild goats, pigs and imprisonment, a lion All Rights Reserved. Run, 1 in jumped the people, and others, that is, the Welsh would not.



    Just came up with this now with a friend, I think its brill.
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    Oh my gosh, ignore the above, they make no sense. This one though... whoa I think I am on par with shakespeare.

    Posts calf fat.
    But he was afraid, I do not know.
    So he pulled out of the body.
    If the abdomen and legs.
    All people Evvi evvi.
    Animals and plants in the garden now, and that
    In short, we have the whole day, I think it really baaaad.
    Saaaad sheep or not.
    If he is hungry.
    A woman who sits with me.
    I knew I had to exert much effort to hide.
    Frelon casualties injury.
    Women drink a little distance.
    We provide stable angina in women.
    Remote control, seeding and planting.
    The heart of progress.
    Horny pole dancing equipment.
    Jack AOS vagina.
    Management software and coronary heart disease frelon share.
    Farting wife.
    I will open my heart and body.
    Dinar Dinar deuterium in my heart not to breastfeed.
    Buck, if our
    Jack and evil head and
    Lucy and Jack go.
    Lucy exclaimed feed axis.
    This spirit of angina juicy.
    Lucia, as expected, when I see oil on the bed.
    But I hate the process.
    In July, we are on a diet.
    In July of appetite.
    For the life of residents.
    For the implementation began.
    cervical spine - a lot.
    Woods and drink Sit Amet.
    We believe juicy.
    Seeds are planted in the car.
    Spirit of sperm and
    And he was angry and cents.
    Good: "Hey, I saw Jack.
    Production of honey with coronary heart disease in particular.
    Dressed in the same spirit he aghatava very rich.
    The heart of the rich Kouri.
    Sunday Niameun my heart.
    Perdyt sound.
    We have introduced the concept of evil, Jack Ritchie.
    Jack, Lucy, cast ass at home.
    After all, even to make them easy to do, Lucy.
    Ischemic heart disease or high cholesterol.
    Lucia, the future of oil.
    If you have bad water, cooking, and how they go.
    In July, the whole body.
    I do not drink, not smoke clouds.
    The message will be.
    Drain.
    With him.
    More.
    From
    EV - pork cooked and not the best.
    But I'm sure.
    But the more beautiful things.
    George, 40, should be punished.
    To my urine.
    And what he loved.
    Click [OK] cowboy.
    Yellow.
    Oh, it's easy.
    Fasaming really great.
    I
    Sound.
    I do not know, etoloji.
    More Julia.
    This is how bad
    All
    U of
    View
    I am a bird.
    Indeed, it is, I think. "
    I need a lot of water in oil.
    My name is Harry, a boy. For I know my body. Because they do not live with me and my son. I'm not in jail, I do not fear and pain แ teehigi! Interestingly, spit, as wayward sheep. I have the disease, setting up, and I think that the head and legs. Place wild goats, pigs, lions and more prisons. No one in the Welsh run.
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    You're like the Jackson Pollock of the poetry world. I kind of like what you've done... It's chaotic but still kind of vivid and enjoyable.
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    I don't understand a word of what you say... yet it is oddly rivetting and enjoyable.
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    Thankyou I have a strange way of writing poetry, it just comes to me in a bizarre way.

    I have written some other poems which are a bit more normal but they are a bit more personal and not as fun to write.
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    Awful. Just awful. You don't understand what poetry is at all....
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    I doubt anyone is interested but I came up with another, the words flashed in my head and I wrote them down.

    Disk of smile,
    And the sharks,
    That recent changes facing the market and lead the comments of a severe shortage,
    And the service abuse,
    A nice girl,
    A city escape forward.
    He was cold and gray in color and amazing his friends,
    And life is too late to return said funds on hand - I until recently,
    I solutions,
    The solutions developed as part of a country,
    We have not closed the public hearing is a bird,
    Is believed to be a cry,
    He learned to play at night,
    I consideration,
    I know. "I was a child, or in fact, I love you, see below,"
    The operating room, mouth, lead, beads, I Love You,
    I understand,
    "Thank you".
    "Saved my life" ...
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    Dense shark oleometer combining with
    Is it really necessary to fill the pantry ?
    Mrs Badger produces umpteen quails from her
    Is it is it is it intrepid wang

    :borat:
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    I don't understand...

    but it's your poetry so as long as it's meaningful to you lol
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    (Original post by the bear)
    Dense shark oleometer combining with
    Is it really necessary to fill the pantry ?
    Mrs Badger produces umpteen quails from her
    Is it is it is it intrepid wang

    :borat:
    I love this
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    (Original post by Ilovewritingpoems)
    I love this
    Orange bin meringues loping gamily across the
    She waved her palookas mysteriously at the Gatekeeper
    Oleagraph them please he wittered kindly and so
    It was that the trumpet major came to town
    Ferrity ferrity gongle that my pritstick
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    You have a... unique.... style...
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    I like it It's something different. I wouldn't worry too much about criticism (even if it is constructive) if I were you because I think poetry is about the connection between the writer and their pen. It has to be special to you as they are your thoughts and something personal.
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    the dinner lady groaned with pleasure
    as she unwrapped the goatsticks
    and nibbled daintily with her bronze molars
    My Norbert liked these she ejaculated
    He preferred the rhubarb although
    They were restricted to graduates
    The headmaster swapped them for a go
    On Norbert's personal hovercraft
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    If you are serious, then I think they are great. I love the unconventional style. It actually reminds me of something from the late 50s and 60s and makes me think that you are very creative and open-minded. But I get the feeling you're joking.
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    In all honesty, I think they're all terrible and I think I've read better from people in primary school. The odd thing is is that the poem you wrote when you were 6 is better than the rest, so your level of ? (I'm not going to call it poetry) is clearly declining.
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    (Original post by A level Az)
    In all honesty, I think they're all terrible and I think I've read better from people in primary school. The odd thing is is that the poem you wrote when you were 6 is better than the rest, so your level of ? (I'm not going to call it poetry) is clearly declining.
    I was joking about being 6, but I appreciate it's not to everyone's taste. Thank you for the comment.

    Also thanks to everyone else who commented
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    Absolutely dreadful. Poetry shouldn't just be a load of fancy words thrown into lines. It actually has to have meaning.

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Updated: June 28, 2012
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