relationships with international students - doomed from the start?

hello, i saw the thread on 'how do you know a relationship will work' and it made me think this.

in the short term, fair enough you can have fun. but in the long term, its a different country to which they will return, different culture, language,possibly religion and racial issues.....

does it work? anyone any sucess/failure stories?

Reply 1

BexTait

I don't see why it can't work, a relative of mine is due to get married soon, he works in Brussels, she lives in Portugal (I can't remember hw they met off the top of my head, I think it was something to do with her being in Brussels at some point).

Reply 2

shinytoy

but if they love each other and he goes back, they will have the difficulty of long distance relations. if they get married, one of them will have to give up everything and move

Reply 3

it'll work if you want it to work.if you're negative or sceptic (sp?) from the start then it won't. i am an international student (technically) and i went back during the summer and didn't see my bf for 2-3 months,we're still together now though,a year and a bit later.so it can work. :smile:

Reply 4

username30638

I'm sure they can work but I also imagine they can be extremely difficult to maintain. I have met a lot of international students that I've been really attracted to, but I've been reluctant to take things further because there is always the thought in the back of my mind that they will probably only be in this country for a year. The idea of an overseas relationship where I'd rarely see my girlfriend does not appeal in the slightest :redface:

Reply 5

BexTait

shinytoy

but if they love each other and he goes back, they will have the difficulty of long distance relations. if they get married, one of them will have to give up everything and move

If you love each other enough, then you will make it work.
In the case of my relative, they're both going to move to England (where my relative is originally from).

With regards to who gives something up, that's obviously something that you would hve to work out as a couple, although if one/both have transferrable skills/jobs (eg nursing), then it perhaps not that difficult.

Reply 6

Angelil

My boyfriend came to my uni as a French Erasmus student. I live in England and he still (at present) lives in France. Our relationship has always been long distance, and we've been together for 13 months (yesterday). There's always hope.

Reply 7

xXMessedUpXx

I could never have done the international relationship thing, my ex and i were together 18 months then he got a 3 years postig to Las Vegas, and we decided it wuld be fairer to split than to put each other through that.

Reply 8

Hoofbeat

Likewise it can work in completely the opposite ways for international students! One of my good friends has been in a long term relationship back in her own country, but she spends over half of the year here in the UK at Uni and only ever sees him in the holidays. They've made it work for a number of years, so hopefully they've got through the most difficult times and will continue on strongly.

Reply 9

Chase Me

At the end of the day, you have to make things happen. Love is a two way thing and if you believe it is the be all and end all then you will sacrifice all you have.