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Working Class at University?

I wanted to ask if any other Working Class students feel this way.

So i'm a couple of months into Uni. Everyone always talks about the different people you meet and the unlikely friendships you make. I come from a working class background and the majority of my life have been around people like me. Put it this way, about 90 percent of people at my Sixth form recieved EMA. Now I've come to Uni and most people seem to be middle class. I had no problem with this and was looking forward to meeting people of all different backgrounds.
The thing is that I feel out of place at times. The only friends I have are like me. When I talk to people I feel like I have to walk on eggshells. I dont feel like I can relate to people as they seem to be so different. I cant understand their sense of humour and they cant understand mine. I feel like I have to change the way I talk and hold back on any opinions. I don't really want to change who I am to impress other people. I am glad I have made a few friends but I dont want to limit myself to a small group. At the same time, I find it difficult talking to alot of the other people. I am not shy and have always been quite outgoing and relatively popular. I feel like people at Uni look down on me. I've had comments like "you have a ghetto accent" :s-smilie: Or people taking the piss by finishing a sentence with "init". I don't even use much slang at all btw. I can take harmless jokes but it feels like I am judged and i just can't get along with them unless I change. I feel like I have to fake laugh and think before I say anything at all.
(edited 12 years ago)

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Do you really want to hang around with people who take the piss because of where you come from? Stick with the people who appreciate you for who you are, not who others think you should be.

I've had a similar experience. I'm not sure whether I'd class myself as working or middle class (I'm not really bothered so I don't think about it that often!) but I come from Lincolnshire and people seem to have a problem with that because it's north (apparently - last time I checked it was in the Midlands, but anyway!). A couple of days ago a girl said to me "do you say 'bath' and 'grass' in the posh way or the chavvy way?"... And when I told her I said "baath" she looked surprised. I asked her why and she said "well, you're from Lincolnshire." Eh yes, have you got a problem with that? (I wasn't even aware using short vowels is chavvy but there we are!).

So I don't think it's uncommon to be judged on where you come from but at the same time, I don't think it's particularly acceptable for people to judge you on something so superficial either.
(edited 12 years ago)
Reply 2
Original post by ilovefashion90
I wanted to ask if any other Working Class students feel this way.

So i'm a couple of months into Uni. Everyone always talks about the different people you meet and the unlikely friendships you make. I come from a working class background and the majority of my life have been around people like me. Put it this way, about 90 percent of people at my Sixth form recieved EMA. Now I've come to Uni and most people seem to be middle class. I had no problem with this and was looking forward to meeting people of all different backgrounds.
The thing is that I feel out of place at times. The only friends I have are like me. When I talk to people I feel like I have to walk on eggshells. I dont feel like I can relate to people as they seem to be so different. I cant understand their sense of humour and they cant understand mine. I feel like I have to change the way I talk and hold back on any opinions. I don't really want to change who I am to impress other people. I am glad I have made a few friends but I dont want to limit myself to a small group. At the same time, I find it difficult talking to alot of the other people. I am not shy and have always been quite outgoing and relatively popular. I feel like people at Uni look down on me. I've had comments like "you have a ghetto accent" :s-smilie: Or people taking the piss by finishing a sentence with "init". I don't even use much slang at all btw. I can take harmless jokes but it feels like I am judged and i just can't get along with them unless I change. I feel like I have to fake laugh and think before I say anything at all.


Don't let others judge you, make your won judgment!
Dude most people from working class background go through this, don't make a big deal.
Reply 3
I'm from a working class family, I haven't really noticed a difference due to class, but if they are taking the mick then try and find some other people.

Class has never proved an issue, 5 people (me included) in my flat are from London so the others have no idea what we're on about when we use slang words, so the only difference is due to location, it hasn't really been a class thing. Although one of my flatmates seems even upper middle class, her family is paying her fees and she lives in a huge house that's been passed down the generations for over 200 years. (I've seen the pictures :eek:)
I'm not 'working class', but I can assure you that nobody actually cares where you're from. The comments are probably their misjudged way of trying to make conversation, most of the time they are probably too absorbed in themselves to judge you.

A lot more people than you think feel out of place at university, usually because they come with such high expectations. You just have to look at some of the threads on here.

That said, I'm sorry you feel out of place. :hugs: I think my best advice (as a second-year) would be DON'T change how you talk and act to fit in - they will just sense the awkwardness and you will never feel comfortable. Act naturally, and you will find people who accept who you are. :smile:
This annoys me, can I just say, you are at university, doing the same degree as them, so what makes them middle class and you working class? You are equal. I despise the class system, never label yourself as something because you automatically limit yourself and judge others around you.

If you didn't think of yourself as working class and them as middle class you wouldn't think much of it.
Reply 6
i'm from a working class family and at times feel a bit put off- not because of people mocking my accent but because of people's lifestyles being vastly different and finding you have so little in common (sounds judgemental but it can be very true) and people make assumptions about you based on accent/where your from.

If they're mocking the way you speak- mock their posh accents etc. If they laugh, they are just being friendly and it's meant to be a bit of "banter", if they don't, they aren't worth it.
Reply 7
Original post by ilovefashion90
I wanted to ask if any other Working Class students feel this way.

So i'm a couple of months into Uni. Everyone always talks about the different people you meet and the unlikely friendships you make. I come from a working class background and the majority of my life have been around people like me. Put it this way, about 90 percent of people at my Sixth form recieved EMA. Now I've come to Uni and most people seem to be middle class. I had no problem with this and was looking forward to meeting people of all different backgrounds.
The thing is that I feel out of place at times. The only friends I have are like me. When I talk to people I feel like I have to walk on eggshells. I dont feel like I can relate to people as they seem to be so different. I cant understand their sense of humour and they cant understand mine. I feel like I have to change the way I talk and hold back on any opinions. I don't really want to change who I am to impress other people. I am glad I have made a few friends but I dont want to limit myself to a small group. At the same time, I find it difficult talking to alot of the other people. I am not shy and have always been quite outgoing and relatively popular. I feel like people at Uni look down on me. I've had comments like "you have a ghetto accent" :s-smilie: Or people taking the piss by finishing a sentence with "init". I don't even use much slang at all btw. I can take harmless jokes but it feels like I am judged and i just can't get along with them unless I change. I feel like I have to fake laugh and think before I say anything at all.


Just find people who you get on with and aren't complete nobheads. It's a shame we have this class divide, I and many of my friends seem to have found similar problems when studying. I think it's a real shame that people are seperated out at such a young age by nothing but background. For instance, I have many middle class friends but I could never be great friends with them like I could with some of the other ordinary people i've met since studying. It's really difficult when you come home as well, because you change but your old mates don't, so you end up stuck somewhere between ordinary and the middle.
Reply 8
Original post by StillIll
i'm from a working class family and at times feel a bit put off- not because of people mocking my accent but because of people's lifestyles being vastly different and finding you have so little in common (sounds judgemental but it can be very true) and people make assumptions about you based on accent/where your from.

If they're mocking the way you speak- mock their posh accents etc. If they laugh, they are just being friendly and it's meant to be a bit of "banter", if they don't, they aren't worth it.


How are peoples lifestyles different?
Reply 9
Original post by ilovefashion90
I wanted to ask if any other Working Class students feel this way.

So i'm a couple of months into Uni. Everyone always talks about the different people you meet and the unlikely friendships you make. I come from a working class background and the majority of my life have been around people like me. Put it this way, about 90 percent of people at my Sixth form recieved EMA. Now I've come to Uni and most people seem to be middle class. I had no problem with this and was looking forward to meeting people of all different backgrounds.
The thing is that I feel out of place at times. The only friends I have are like me. When I talk to people I feel like I have to walk on eggshells. I dont feel like I can relate to people as they seem to be so different. I cant understand their sense of humour and they cant understand mine. I feel like I have to change the way I talk and hold back on any opinions. I don't really want to change who I am to impress other people. I am glad I have made a few friends but I dont want to limit myself to a small group. At the same time, I find it difficult talking to alot of the other people. I am not shy and have always been quite outgoing and relatively popular. I feel like people at Uni look down on me. I've had comments like "you have a ghetto accent" :s-smilie: Or people taking the piss by finishing a sentence with "init". I don't even use much slang at all btw. I can take harmless jokes but it feels like I am judged and i just can't get along with them unless I change. I feel like I have to fake laugh and think before I say anything at all.


its hard,

sometimes i think have i changed, or do i look like a fake, when im not trying to be something i am not.....


honestly
Original post by EffieFlowers
This annoys me, can I just say, you are at university, doing the same degree as them, so what makes them middle class and you working class? You are equal. I despise the class system, never label yourself as something because you automatically limit yourself and judge others around you.

If you didn't think of yourself as working class and them as middle class you wouldn't think much of it.


But I'm the one being labelled. I have been called "ghetto" several times. I have had people asking me what its like and what its like etc.
One time the teacher asked us to define who we are and we had to do so in groups. i defined myself as my gender, religion, age and occupation. I honestly didnt think class was relevant as like you said, we are all doing the same degree and i wasnt sure if I still carry my class label being at University. But, one of the other members of my group said that I should maybe put my class down too. Its little things like that that have made me feel out of place
Original post by EffieFlowers
This annoys me, can I just say, you are at university, doing the same degree as them, so what makes them middle class and you working class? You are equal. I despise the class system, never label yourself as something because you automatically limit yourself and judge others around you.

If you didn't think of yourself as working class and them as middle class you wouldn't think much of it.


Your environment is part of who you are and your environment is often heavily influenced by your class. Positive thinking will not bridge the gap.:rolleyes:
I'm Middle Class, but I would never look down on anyone whose working class- at UEA the majority of people went to state schools so I mix with working class people all the time. We have had the bath/baath conversation, though that was more to make the distinction between North/South than working class or not. I've yet to meet anyone from London (or the south in generall actually) who says baath, regardless of background. The only thing that peeves me is working class people saying oh Oxbridge is really posh, I wouldn't want to go there (just because they percieve it as posh.)
Reply 13
Original post by Besakt
How are peoples lifestyles different?


Their lifestyles back home are different, not as much their university ones (presuming they are living at uni). So when you roll up at uni, it's obvious, especially right at the beginning. You're used to associating with different kinds of people and it can be difficult to find common ground sometimes.
Reply 14
How could anybody know your 'class'? I can't imagine someone actually asked you directly...

Like someone said already it's all irrelevant anyway, even more so at uni.
Is it not just more a comment on your culture and accent than the class you are from? I know I take the mickey out of my southern friends for being "posh" when of course they're not much different from me apart from accent. It's just harmless fun.
Reply 16
Yeah man i had the same problems as i come from a working class background in Ireland.. I went to Uni in london this year and i got comments about my accent and the way i talk and my opinions. From middle/high class english people the fact was that i didnt change the things i did and i never will and most importantly didnt let anybody walk over me for who I am.

And i didnt try to pretend something i wasn't just to fit in whats the point being false. My advice is be yourself and do what you want to do and dont lose your identity for people who have a few quid more they tend to be tight with there cash anyways lol
Original post by Muninn
How could anybody know your 'class'? I can't imagine someone actually asked you directly...

Like someone said already it's all irrelevant anyway, even more so at uni.


I dont know but everyone seemed to pick up on it quickly. Even if they dont know my class as i have never explicitly said "i am working class", they have picked up on the way I speak and some things I say and make fun of me for that. An example is when me and a few people went to visit the other campus. I don't know why but there were bikes just lying around. Opposite was a bike shop and me and one friend said that it was weird that these bikes are still here. There was about two on either side of the street and 3 of them were broken/had a missing chain or tyre. Me and my friend were saying how its so weird seeing them just out here and no one even so much as looking at them. I said how bikes always get stolen in my area and if anyones bikes even get stolen in my area, they were stolen from others anyway. Me and my friend were genuinely surprised but the rest of the group just looked at us and laughed while mumbling things to each other.
They acted like I just told them there are gangbangs on the streets and shootouts every week.
Original post by chap54
Just find people who you get on with and aren't complete nobheads. It's a shame we have this class divide, I and many of my friends seem to have found similar problems when studying. I think it's a real shame that people are seperated out at such a young age by nothing but background. For instance, I have many middle class friends but I could never be great friends with them like I could with some of the other ordinary people i've met since studying. It's really difficult when you come home as well, because you change but your old mates don't, so you end up stuck somewhere between ordinary and the middle.



Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. I know i already said it but I feel out of place. Even if I go out to lunch with some people I dont feel like I am being myself and I am holding back the real me to impress people at Uni and that I can never really be great friends with them. I didnt move out for Uni so I find it strange going to Uni and coming back home to see my friends who finished college a couple of hours earlier. It feels weird being at Uni while most of my friends are at College or different Unis.
Original post by JCC-MGS
Your environment is part of who you are and your environment is often heavily influenced by your class. Positive thinking will not bridge the gap.:rolleyes:


That's completely irrelevant. :rolleyes:

The point I am making is, if you think of yourself as working class and as 'them' as middle class then you are automatically judging yourself, judging them and comparing and contrasting.

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