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How to tell my boyfriend I have no friends

I started Uni this year and have met a really lovely boyfriend. Uni is great and I have made several really nice friends.

However, during school I was severely depressed and suffered from panic disorder (almost daily panic attacks) and therefore lost every single friend from home as they all gradually gave up on me over the 2 years that I had depression.

Fortunately my depression has eased off a lot since starting Uni, I think I needed a big change and it has helped me a lot, although I still get periods of depression it is no where near as bad and I am generally really happy now :smile:

The problem is that my boyfriend has LOADS of friends from home, he is always talking about them, he has introduced me to them and now he is starting to ask about MY friends... I'm terrified of telling him that I actually have none, he has no idea about my depression because Im now so happy at Uni, I don't know what to do! After all my friends left me because of my depression , Im now scared he will too. I genuinely have no friends at home and no one to see in the holidays and I don't know how to tell him. xx

Reply 1

megan205

I would just tell him the truth. You don't have to go into loads of detail - just say that you had a hard time at school and not many friends. In my opinion, they weren't your real friends if they left you during hard times and if your boyfriend does the same then you're better off without him.

It's good that you're a lot happier now and I hope you feel even better when you don't feel like you're hiding something from him. If he cares for you, he'll understand.

Reply 2

whizz-kid

I would just say how it is tbh and tell him why I'm sure he will understand if he's a keeper :smile:

Reply 3

sr90

Volunteer Team

Aww, i appreciate how hard this must be for you but i would try to tell him. Not necessarily that you've been through depression, the ''i had a hard time at school'' line is perfectly acceptable and most people would understand/respect that. Your boyf only knows you as this happy, more confident person and he obviously likes what he sees, he's certainly not going to run away if you tell him.

(edited 12 years ago)

Reply 4

Georgiahoneybee

I would tell him exactly what you've put here. If you don't want to talk about the depression (although perhaps it will come up eventually?), then as others have suggested, just say you had a difficult time at school and your friends didn't stick around. It's nothing to be ashamed about, it's not your fault your friends didn't know how to remain friends with someone with depression- it says more about them than you.