[fallen_acorns]

(Original post by takethyfacehence)
Hey there, I'm another cisperson reading this thread, trying to learn about the trans* community. I've only recently started to understand it properly - I have to say, I know it must be awful facing the world a lot of the time as a trans* but if that you guys can try to bear with those of us who are just very unfamiliar with your plight and need to learn more about it all.



I didn't read the second link but the first one - jesus christ! They sound bonkers on many levels though. Obviously worse for trans*folk but even if one was a selfish cisperson, this kind of sh** this is scary and damaging. So much hate


I'm glad you were feeling yourself as for the rash - do you moisturize? I personally find moisturizer helps my (shaven) skin lots

---

[ZZ9]

(Original post by Cool Cat)
goodluck with the Chinese application, do you have chinese heritage?

see, I never used to think about this stuff before but over the last couple of years it's gotten overwhelming. Most trans people feel this way from very young so I feel like somehow I've brought this on myself, I dunno

Nope

I'm the same. I never really thought about it when I was little- I was allowed to dress how I liked and have my hair how I liked, so when I wanted to have short hair and boys' clothes, there wasn't any problem. I don't think you can bring it on yourself, I'm not sure though.

(Original post by fallen_acorns)
i thought id try to keep this thread up-dated with what im doing - as it may help keep me motivated/confident enough to keep going.

Last night and today, was both amazing and awful:

amazing: female clothes, + shaved body + reasonable hair = feeling so awsome and right, last night with partner, was amazing... nice to spend an evening in clothes that feel right/match who i am...

Awfull: today - shaved legs/hips, came out in a massive painfull rash... all blotch/spotty/slightly pussy... not good, very painfull... very uncomfortable...

waxing may be a solution... :P

i hope all you other posters are ok + doing well,

x

Your evening sounded great

Re shaving, my sister sometimes has a similar problem. I think it can be helped by using a new razor and using a shaving foam (I believe that they make them specifically for leg shaving). Would Veet cream or something similar been an option? (I don't know how effective/expensive it is, but I've seen adverts. I think it's a hair removal cream..)

Hope it goes better next time

[kerily]

(Original post by fallen_acorns)
Awfull: today - shaved legs/hips, came out in a massive painfull rash... all blotch/spotty/slightly pussy... not good, very painfull... very uncomfortable...

waxing may be a solution... :P

I used to get this when I actually shaved

Make sure you're using a new, sharp razor blade. If you can stand it, use one aimed at 'men'; razors designated for 'women' are pretty much universally more ****e than their 'male' equivalents Make sure you use shaving cream (I used to use facial shaving cream for my legs ) and moisturise after. Also bear in mind that you might be allergic to whatever you're moisturising with - I'm allergic to aloe vera myself

If you've not shaved there before, your body will be going 'my god, what is this?' and reacting badly because it's not used to it - it should improve with time Likewise if you've not shaved for a while, or if the hair is pretty long and coarse. Basically, hang in there, and it will improve

[fallen_acorns]

(Original post by ZZ9)
Your evening sounded great

Re shaving, my sister sometimes has a similar problem. I think it can be helped by using a new razor and using a shaving foam (I believe that they make them specifically for leg shaving). Would Veet cream or something similar been an option? (I don't know how effective/expensive it is, but I've seen adverts. I think it's a hair removal cream..)

Hope it goes better next time

(Original post by kerily)
I used to get this when I actually shaved

Make sure you're using a new, sharp razor blade. If you can stand it, use one aimed at 'men'; razors designated for 'women' are pretty much universally more ****e than their 'male' equivalents Make sure you use shaving cream (I used to use facial shaving cream for my legs ) and moisturise after. Also bear in mind that you might be allergic to whatever you're moisturising with - I'm allergic to aloe vera myself

If you've not shaved there before, your body will be going 'my god, what is this?' and reacting badly because it's not used to it - it should improve with time Likewise if you've not shaved for a while, or if the hair is pretty long and coarse. Basically, hang in there, and it will improve

---

[kerily]

I have discovered the cutest thing in the universe: a webcomic with lots of queer characters, including two who are trans! This is the beginning of the transguy's story and this is the beginning of the transgirl's story, but to be honest the whole thing is worth reading

[the cake lady]

(Original post by the cake lady)
I would really like to understand more about trans/cis gender.

So I have some questions, especially to yourself Kerily.

1. How did you or do you know, specifically, that you were wrongly assigned female but you are actually male?

2. Much like the arguments of whether homosexuality is biological, genetic or psychological (or a mixture), where do you think you are on the spectrum? Purely biological? Purely psychological?

3. Do you have any regrets or any doubts about the decisions you have made?

4. Would you describe yourself as masculine or typically male?

5. Do you think your sexuality is directly correspondent to your gender? Do you think that if you had been assigned male at birth that you would still have the same sexuality as you do now?

6. What are your thoughts on the effect of being TG/CG on one's mental health?

I don't mind if these questions are too invasive or if non TG/CG are not welcome here but I'm very curious and need educated about this stuff.

Please can someone explain why my post got neg rep? Did I, in any way shape or form sound judgemental? If so please forgive me.

It's something I have no previous experience, knowledge or thoughts on so where else do I get an understanding from? Could someone direct me to another source of information?

I understand this thread wasn't created for debate. I'm not trying to debate.

Surely, as a misunderstood area, you guys should be creating awareness and understanding?

[fallen_acorns]

(Original post by the cake lady)
Please can someone explain why my post got neg rep? Did I, in any way shape or form sound judgemental? If so please forgive me.

It's something I have no previous experience, knowledge or thoughts on so where else do I get an understanding from? Could someone direct me to another source of information?

I understand this thread wasn't created for debate. I'm not trying to debate.

Surely, as a misunderstood area, you guys should be creating awareness and understanding?

---

[kerily]

(Original post by the cake lady)
Please can someone explain why my post got neg rep? Did I, in any way shape or form sound judgemental? If so please forgive me.

It's something I have no previous experience, knowledge or thoughts on so where else do I get an understanding from? Could someone direct me to another source of information?

I understand this thread wasn't created for debate. I'm not trying to debate.

Surely, as a misunderstood area, you guys should be creating awareness and understanding?

It's TSR, people neg things

In the original post, I stated that this thread isn't intended for curious cisgender people; there are a variety of resources out there for people who want to educate themselves, which a quick Google search will tell you, which I linked to. As for whether trans people have a responsibility to make cis people understand us, I rather think the onus is on cis people to make themselves less ignorant instead.

I'm not a fan of the wording of your questions either; I don't appreciate the 'do you have any doubts?' line of questioning. Hence why I didn't reply to your post, which I'm pretty sure I'm well within my rights to do.

[kerily]

(Original post by fallen_acorns)
(i know this thread isnt meant to be about this - but answering these questions actaully, was kind of nice and helpfull to try and get some thoughts in order - this post can be removed if its not what you want in the thread, kerily.)

If you find it useful to answer questions like that, then feel free Talking about how you feel and why you think you feel that way can be really helpful.

[kerily]

I had problems getting into a gay club last night because I'm trans.

[najinaji]

(Original post by kerily)
I had problems getting into a gay club last night because I'm trans.

That's awful! I don't see how they could justify that at all.

[kerily]

(Original post by najinaji)
That's awful! I don't see how they could justify that at all.

Shamelessly copied-and-pasted from my tumblr:

Spoiler:

Show

So tonight I had issues getting into a gay club because I’m trans.
Disclaimer: I am HORRIFICALLY DRUNK and having to triple-check this for typos. I apologise if the tone is a bit off.

So tonight was an UCL LGBT night out! I went to the committee meeting (which was MUCH less bad than I’d imagined) and then I had a drink in Phineas (VERY CHEAPLY) and then I got the tube down to Vauxhall for gay clubbing.

Turns out they wanted to search you going in, just in case. No problems there. They came down the line asking everyone for the women to go to the front, because the woman to search them was stood with nothing to do. I didn’t join the women’s line, because I’m NOT A ****ING WOMAN. Nothing against women. I am just NOT ONE OF THEM.

And the guy was like ‘are you going to get in the women’s queue?’ and I was like ‘no, I’m not a woman’ and he left me alone.

Until I got to the front of the queue. And then he refused to search me because ‘he can’t search women’ and then he made me go in the women’s queue.

I AM A ****ING MAN.

THIS WAS A ****ING GAY CLUB.

****ERS.

So I was searched by a woman. Despite not being a woman.

And then, you know, making an enemy of the bouncer is really NOT how you should go into a club. So when I came out (about an hour ago, because I was in a bad mood and the drinks were overpriced) I stopped to chat to some friends in the queue, and he was shouting/gesticulating that I should go away pronto.

****ERS.

I don’t understand why it’s SO ****ING ACCEPTABLE to give trans people ****.

[najinaji]

(Original post by kerily)
Shamelessly copied-and-pasted from my tumblr:

Spoiler:

Show

So tonight I had issues getting into a gay club because I’m trans.
Disclaimer: I am HORRIFICALLY DRUNK and having to triple-check this for typos. I apologise if the tone is a bit off.

So tonight was an UCL LGBT night out! I went to the committee meeting (which was MUCH less bad than I’d imagined) and then I had a drink in Phineas (VERY CHEAPLY) and then I got the tube down to Vauxhall for gay clubbing.

Turns out they wanted to search you going in, just in case. No problems there. They came down the line asking everyone for the women to go to the front, because the woman to search them was stood with nothing to do. I didn’t join the women’s line, because I’m NOT A ****ING WOMAN. Nothing against women. I am just NOT ONE OF THEM.

And the guy was like ‘are you going to get in the women’s queue?’ and I was like ‘no, I’m not a woman’ and he left me alone.

Until I got to the front of the queue. And then he refused to search me because ‘he can’t search women’ and then he made me go in the women’s queue.

I AM A ****ING MAN.

THIS WAS A ****ING GAY CLUB.

****ERS.

So I was searched by a woman. Despite not being a woman.

And then, you know, making an enemy of the bouncer is really NOT how you should go into a club. So when I came out (about an hour ago, because I was in a bad mood and the drinks were overpriced) I stopped to chat to some friends in the queue, and he was shouting/gesticulating that I should go away pronto.

****ERS.

I don’t understand why it’s SO ****ING ACCEPTABLE to give trans people ****.

Oh god, I'm sorry. And when you're meant to be going to have a nice time as well...

It's a shame we live in a similar climate for trans people that gay people had to deal with in the past. Hopefully most people will get over it at some point. I was feeling a bit of dysphoria yesterday, and I simply looked online at this page: http://ai.eecs.umich.edu/people/conw.../TransMen.html and it made me feel so much better.

Sorry if this is an intrusive question, but are you planning to go on testosterone?

[kerily]

(Original post by najinaji)
Oh god, I'm sorry. And when you're meant to be going to have a nice time as well...

It's a shame we live in a similar climate for trans people that gay people had to deal with in the past. Hopefully most people will get over it at some point. I was feeling a bit of dysphoria yesterday, and I simply looked online at this page: http://ai.eecs.umich.edu/people/conw.../TransMen.html and it made me feel so much better.

Sorry if this is an intrusive question, but are you planning to go on testosterone?

I know Plus people laughed. SIGH. I went home asap, don't worry.

I love that website I would recommend avoiding the internet sometimes, though. A lot of the 'social activism'-style stuff just serves to bash trans men for our 'male privilege' (chance would be a fine thing!) and the like. Not a fan.

And yes I want to fully transition medically and I get so excited about the idea! How about you?

[najinaji]

(Original post by kerily)
I know Plus people laughed. SIGH. I went home asap, don't worry.

I love that website I would recommend avoiding the internet sometimes, though. A lot of the 'social activism'-style stuff just serves to bash trans men for our 'male privilege' (chance would be a fine thing!) and the like. Not a fan.

And yes I want to fully transition medically and I get so excited about the idea! How about you?

Very true. Some websites are just awful, especially some of the 'radical feminist' ones... Have you heard of 'Dirt', by the way? She pretty much stalks trans men and posts their Youtube accounts on her blog. It is unbelievably creepy. Her blog is called 'The dirt from Dirt' if you really want to creep yourself out.

I plan to transition medically too. I'm going to phone up for an appointment with my GP on Monday and hopefully I'll be able to chat to her in the week and start the process. Are you going down the NHS route?

[kerily]

(Original post by najinaji)
Very true. Some websites are just awful, especially some of the 'radical feminist' ones... Have you heard of 'Dirt', by the way? She pretty much stalks trans men and posts their Youtube accounts on her blog. It is unbelievably creepy. Her blog is called 'The dirt from Dirt' if you really want to creep yourself out.

I plan to transition medically too. I'm going to phone up for an appointment with my GP on Monday and hopefully I'll be able to chat to her in the week and start the process. Are you going down the NHS route?

Oh god, I have. There are some HORRIBLE ones out there. I shall avoid the Dirt person at all costs

I wish you luck transitioning under 18... I'm honestly not sure if or how that can be done in the UK. I went to see a psychiatrist about it and she said she'd give me a referral, but that was 2 months ago and I've heard nothing, so I'm off to my GP next week to shout at her and make it go through I am indeed going the NHS route, on grounds of being poor

[Tortious]

(Original post by kerily)
...

I saw your post earlier (without clicking the link) and Khaos Komix was the first thing that came to mind! Did you know that its author, Tab Kimpton, is trans? Just thought you might be interested.

(Sorry, I've been lurking. I'll leave now. )

[kerily]

(Original post by Tortious)
I saw your post earlier (without clicking the link) and Khaos Komix was the first thing that came to mind! Did you know that its author, Tab Kimpton, is trans? Just thought you might be interested.

(Sorry, I've been lurking. I'll leave now. )

I adore Khaos Komix! I read through the entire thing, from start to finish, last week. The transguy character is even called Tom and all

[Tortious]

(Original post by kerily)
I adore Khaos Komix! I read through the entire thing, from start to finish, last week. The transguy character is even called Tom and all

Yeah, I thought of you when I remembered.

If you don't mind me asking, how did you go about choosing your name? I appreciate it's probably quite an important step, so I'm curious to see how you decided what "sticks".

[najinaji]

(Original post by kerily)
Oh god, I have. There are some HORRIBLE ones out there. I shall avoid the Dirt person at all costs

I wish you luck transitioning under 18... I'm honestly not sure if or how that can be done in the UK. I went to see a psychiatrist about it and she said she'd give me a referral, but that was 2 months ago and I've heard nothing, so I'm off to my GP next week to shout at her and make it go through I am indeed going the NHS route, on grounds of being poor

Please do. I would happily place a bet on her transitioning at some point. Repression is a terrible thing...

And after some rummaging around on the NHS website, I think you're allowed to start hormone treatment at 16, but I'm turning 18 later this year anyway, so it wouldn't be too awful waiting if I had to be 18 instead. It would probably take that long to get to the hormone stage in the first place. The important bits, such as getting my name changed, getting an updated ID and pressuring my school to accept it all and so on are doable at my age, I think.

I hope you get to a GIC soon! I wonder why referrals take as long as they do?