[topiwopi]

Okay, so I'm doing my english lit and lang text transformation and i'm a little bit stuck as to whether my idea would be okay!

I've already done my first transformation (Browning's my last duchess into a Facebook page :')) but i'm struggling for my second!
I've studied The Great Gatsby & A Streetcar named desire, and i was thinking of changing streetcar into some kind of short detective story? Based around the death of Blanches husband etc, using Conan Doyle, Raymond Chandler and possibly Edgar Allan Poe as a style model?

I was just wondering whether this would be okay and would get me a good enough grade?! and if anyone knew the marking criteria and so on and whether this would meet the requirements? Most people in my class have gone for the obvious diary, letter etc but I want to do something a little bit different!

Thanks

[WXG]

Below I have copied the mark scheme found at http://store.aqa.org.uk/qual/gce/pdf/AQA-2725-W-SP.PDF

When doing the transformation remember that you will have to justify every thing you do in the commentary and to get the best marks you have to not only link it to the author but also use the technique effectively.


MARK BAND DESCRIPTORS: The Transformation

Band 6 28 – 32
AO4 originality in the deployment of the structures and conventions associated with specific and ambitious/challenging genres; clear, effective and assured sense of purpose and audience for the transformations; sensitive and totally appropriate control and manipulation of language and register to meet demands of audience and purpose

Band 5 22 – 27
AO4 confident control over increasingly ambitious genres; sure sense of audience and purpose demonstrated by very effective transformations; coherent and secure language and register effective for audience and purpose

Band 4 17 – 21
AO4 control of genre shown by increasingly subtle awareness of requirements of structures and conventions; transformations likely to be effective in outcome for audience and purpose; growing sophistication in control of language and register

Band 3 12 – 16
AO4 some awareness of structures and conventions associated with specific genres and purpose for audience requirements, may lack judgement and subtlety at times in the transformations; language and register choices generally effective and appropriate

Band 2 6 – 11
AO4 knowledge of genre, audience and purpose demonstrated in simple transformations, less convincing in more ambitious choices mainly appropriate control of language and register in the transformations

Band 1 1 – 5
AO4 limited awareness of audience, genre and purpose; ineffective register, imprecise language choices, little control over writing in the transformations

[NoHeroes94]

Hi, i am doing this course too, and to be honest I think it's hard. You can't have a completely independent idea on what you want to create, but you can't just take a book and put it into a play, or another form it was never meant to be in - and you can't do this without your own input

Firstly, the mark scheme above is important too note (obviously, that is what gets the marks!!) but as you notice, it's quite vague. "confident control" (band 5) - now that could mean different things to different teachers/markers, and is all dependant on the genre. A plan of action is therefore of up most important.

THE ABSOLUTE KEY for me was choosing the right THEMES and MOTIFS. The language will naturally tie in with it, trust me it will come. You have to have a theme or concept to stylise yoru writing. How to do this? Analyse a few scenes you really want to do very, VERY closely. Its better to have to much than too little. Highlight literary and lingustic features in different colours, you dont wanna get mixed up, and perhaps manipulate imagery the author uses, such a fitzgeralds obsession with colour. You can do this with whatever you choose, i'll just take the great gatsby as an example.
The themes in this book are so fascinating, and can be used for a lot of genres - personal writing, poetry and so on. I got 31/32 on it, so not perfect but i'm pretty pleased and i didn't really change the context much - i just added my own ideas, took the themes in the novel and elaborated on them. (NB: i literally just posted a post asking what it was out of because i didnt know, but according to the thread above its out of 32 so thanks too @WXG)

For my second tt, i am doing "the cyrptogram" by david mamet into prose, and that is going swimmingly too, predicted to be at a similar grade. Again, theme theme theme is my advice! Take a theme, look at it closely, imagine what you'd write about it. if it doesnt come, look elsewhere.

Finally some genres to avoid and why (suggestions only)
- Psychology reports and such genres (bit of a downlooked genre. Sounds harsh but all my teachers said to stay away from this like plague
- Film scripts (abit generic, can get top grades but are so common you have to really be at the top for the A's)
- Newspaper covers (year 7's can do this! If you've got to year 13, you can be so much more creative)
- Prose etc. on modern culture colloquialism, i.e "chav's" ( Can be done to great affect IF you research well and are a talented modern writer. The tendency of these is that you become to stereotypical, annoying and one dimensional.)

Good luck, hope this helped a fraction

[topiwopi]

(Original post by NoHeroes94)
Hi, i am doing this course too, and to be honest I think it's hard. You can't have a completely independent idea on what you want to create, but you can't just take a book and put it into a play, or another form it was never meant to be in - and you can't do this without your own input

Firstly, the mark scheme above is important too note (obviously, that is what gets the marks!!) but as you notice, it's quite vague. "confident control" (band 5) - now that could mean different things to different teachers/markers, and is all dependant on the genre. A plan of action is therefore of up most important.

THE ABSOLUTE KEY for me was choosing the right THEMES and MOTIFS. The language will naturally tie in with it, trust me it will come. You have to have a theme or concept to stylise yoru writing. How to do this? Analyse a few scenes you really want to do very, VERY closely. Its better to have to much than too little. Highlight literary and lingustic features in different colours, you dont wanna get mixed up, and perhaps manipulate imagery the author uses, such a fitzgeralds obsession with colour. You can do this with whatever you choose, i'll just take the great gatsby as an example.
The themes in this book are so fascinating, and can be used for a lot of genres - personal writing, poetry and so on. I got 31/32 on it, so not perfect but i'm pretty pleased and i didn't really change the context much - i just added my own ideas, took the themes in the novel and elaborated on them. (NB: i literally just posted a post asking what it was out of because i didnt know, but according to the thread above its out of 32 so thanks too @WXG)

For my second tt, i am doing "the cyrptogram" by david mamet into prose, and that is going swimmingly too, predicted to be at a similar grade. Again, theme theme theme is my advice! Take a theme, look at it closely, imagine what you'd write about it. if it doesnt come, look elsewhere.

Finally some genres to avoid and why (suggestions only)
- Psychology reports and such genres (bit of a downlooked genre. Sounds harsh but all my teachers said to stay away from this like plague
- Film scripts (abit generic, can get top grades but are so common you have to really be at the top for the A's)
- Newspaper covers (year 7's can do this! If you've got to year 13, you can be so much more creative)
- Prose etc. on modern culture colloquialism, i.e "chav's" ( Can be done to great affect IF you research well and are a talented modern writer. The tendency of these is that you become to stereotypical, annoying and one dimensional.)

Good luck, hope this helped a fraction

Thank you that was actually really helpful! I really need to do quite well in this as i'm not too sure about the exam!

So you suggest I look at the themes in Streetcar (i.e. use of certain motifs like colour etc?) and try to incorporate them into my transformation and base it around them? (sorry if i've completely misunderstood!)
I'm struggling because to manipulate the play into a detective style prose piece I would need create the character of a detective, would this be okay as my teacher was speaking about needing to have the 'voice' of characters in the source, and I wouldnt have anything to base the detective i would be creating on if you get me?
and also.. (sorry for all the questions but you seem very good at this!) to what extent does it have to be a 're-telling' of the original? i.e. my teacher said we couldn't just be adding more it had to be sort of retelling the original story but in a different way, and i was just wondering whether it has to re tell all of it or just some of it?

I didnt really want to do anything like a newspaper article or anything like that! lots of people in my class are doing diarys, letters and monologues so i didnt want to do any of those either! My facebook page wasnt really about the colloquialism but more about the behaviours of couples on facebook and how jealousy could be shown etc etc haha

[NoHeroes94]

(Original post by topiwopi)
Thank you that was actually really helpful! I really need to do quite well in this as i'm not too sure about the exam!

So you suggest I look at the themes in Streetcar (i.e. use of certain motifs like colour etc?) and try to incorporate them into my transformation and base it around them? (sorry if i've completely misunderstood!)
I'm struggling because to manipulate the play into a detective style prose piece I would need create the character of a detective, would this be okay as my teacher was speaking about needing to have the 'voice' of characters in the source, and I wouldnt have anything to base the detective i would be creating on if you get me?
and also.. (sorry for all the questions but you seem very good at this!) to what extent does it have to be a 're-telling' of the original? i.e. my teacher said we couldn't just be adding more it had to be sort of retelling the original story but in a different way, and i was just wondering whether it has to re tell all of it or just some of it?

I didnt really want to do anything like a newspaper article or anything like that! lots of people in my class are doing diarys, letters and monologues so i didnt want to do any of those either! My facebook page wasnt really about the colloquialism but more about the behaviours of couples on facebook and how jealousy could be shown etc etc haha

no, you've got it Take the theme, then takes the events of your book and add your twist of it. But getting the theme, the imagery etc will help you in transforming your text greatly.

if you want to base the text on a detective style piece, and you picked out a theme from a book, i.e affairs and infidelity, , you could perhaps look at her affair with that 17 year old, and perhaps make it a legal case (make the 17 year old younger or basing it an an american state where sex under 18 is illegal.) Then perhaps you can incorporate the theme of the pain it brings through the eyes of Blanche - how her stupid actions cost her a job, and all the emotions she feels (diary entry would be perfect for this, hyperbolically rant about how she feels, using similar language to the book). Or perhaps looking at it from a detective's point of view, and talk about how pessimistic he/she feels about society in modern times that such scandals take place?? I guess it's kinda hard to explain,sorry

To get the "voice" of the characters, read. By reading and analysing, you get the characters articulation, ways of speech and values etc. You can then take those for your translation, i.e if the character is philosophical, use rhetorical questions about life and metaphors. If they are sarcastic, make them blunt

This is just advice though. The best people too go to are your teachers, and if you can't do it this way don't, i just found it the crux to A2 coursework.

[topiwopi]

(Original post by NoHeroes94)
no, you've got it Take the theme, then takes the events of your book and add your twist of it. But getting the theme, the imagery etc will help you in transforming your text greatly.

if you want to base the text on a detective style piece, and you picked out a theme from a book, i.e affairs and infidelity, , you could perhaps look at her affair with that 17 year old, and perhaps make it a legal case (make the 17 year old younger or basing it an an american state where sex under 18 is illegal.) Then perhaps you can incorporate the theme of the pain it brings through the eyes of Blanche - how her stupid actions cost her a job, and all the emotions she feels (diary entry would be perfect for this, hyperbolically rant about how she feels, using similar language to the book). Or perhaps looking at it from a detective's point of view, and talk about how pessimistic he/she feels about society in modern times that such scandals take place?? I guess it's kinda hard to explain,sorry

To get the "voice" of the characters, read. By reading and analysing, you get the characters articulation, ways of speech and values etc. You can then take those for your translation, i.e if the character is philosophical, use rhetorical questions about life and metaphors. If they are sarcastic, make them blunt

This is just advice though. The best people too go to are your teachers, and if you can't do it this way don't, i just found it the crux to A2 coursework.

Yeah I was thinking of either basing it around that, or when her husband kills himself, as i thought that could be seen as suspicious later on? and i thought i could then kind of have the detective following what she has been doing, like the 17 year old, and her time working as a prostitute etc etc (so kind of re telling the story??) and there is kind of a theme of the relationship between death and sex throughout so i thought i could incorporate that somehow? or as you say affairs and infidelity

and then I thought i could have blanche and stanley etc speaking to the detective and use their voices there perhaps?

thank you so much! my teacher is pretty useless tbh

[NoHeroes94]

(Original post by topiwopi)
Yeah I was thinking of either basing it around that, or when her husband kills himself, as i thought that could be seen as suspicious later on? and i thought i could then kind of have the detective following what she has been doing, like the 17 year old, and her time working as a prostitute etc etc (so kind of re telling the story??) and there is kind of a theme of the relationship between death and sex throughout so i thought i could incorporate that somehow? or as you say affairs and infidelity

and then I thought i could have blanche and stanley etc speaking to the detective and use their voices there perhaps?

thank you so much! my teacher is pretty useless tbh

no problem mine is too, on my commentary she didnt mark my first draft, then i gave i did asecond just out of things my other teacher suggested and she changed a fair bit! obvious she hadnt marked it :/ anyway, good luck

[lucky]

Hi, im also doing this coursework and i have found myself to be quite stuck on the commentary. what exactly needs to be mentioned in the commentary ?