[Anonymous]

(Original post by Anonymous)
i think you really just have to go with your gut as to which you feel most at home in. i ended up in a sixth form an hour and a half away from where i live, which is the complete opposite of what i was looking for and which i went to on my own so had to make new friends. but the minute i walked in there, i felt at home

sorry if this isnt helpful, but i just think theres only so much advice people can give you before you have to take the plunge and venture into the unknown.

Thanks, I see what you mean.

Looking back at my post, I think it's obvious I should go to college 2 but not really knowing anybody there is what I'm most worried about.

[Sabertooth]

Massive hallucinations attack, but things seem to have calmed down now after an hour long hug. I cried so much my eyes burn and I've got a headache yet I'm still full of tears, just tottering on the edge.

[novaspire]

urgh i hate life. I just want to dream for eternity. When im dreaming im actually worth something to somebody.

[Anonymous]

TL;DR: angst, feel free to ignore.


I feel like my flatmates are bullying me a bit.

We're very, very different but they've always been cool with me. I get really paranoid that they talk about me behind my back, partly because they've talked about other people in our building when I'm there.

Sometimes I feel a bit excluded because the guys all do things together, and all the other girls are very close. They'll go out together and sit in each others' rooms watching films and talking all night, and I don't get asked to join. Most of the time I just sit in my room, but I'm content doing that.

Everyone's very lazy about washing up. I've taken to keeping a couple of bowls, plates and cutlery in my room, so that I'll always have clean things when I need them. I wash them up in the sink in my room too. Every time you go into the kitchen there's a huge heap of dirty plates on the side, and no one cleans them. A couple of times I've washed them out of sheer bloody frustration, but seeing as they're not mine, I don't see why I should have to.

I stuck a note to the wall about the sink asking them to wash up and then went out for a walk in the snow, and when I came back they'd written all over it:
"Did some, the rest is yours!" (They'd washed up one plate and a saucepan)
"Only when you stop doing stinky s**ts"
They turned a smiley face into a cartoon of a guy I slept with last semester (they all know about it and make jokes about it all the time, when really I just want to forget about it because the guy and I are no longer speaking).

I'm just really hurt by that all (particularly the s*** comment - I have IBS and genuinely can't help it, though I use air freshener and try to time it with my showers because the smell of the shampoo hides it as I'm really self conscious about it (and so haven't told anyone)). I'm starving but don't want to go back into the kitchen in case they're all there.

I shouldn't be taking it so hard but I just want to cry.

I'm really glad I'm not living with them next year (I'll be with coursemates instead).

[Anonymous]

(Original post by ViceVersa)
I get that too, but try not to think you're pathetic for it though (I really must take my own advice )

I've done it tooooo many times

Stop being mean to yourself dammit!

its hard not to be mean to myself when theres so much to be mean about

(Original post by Anonymous)
Thanks, I see what you mean.

Looking back at my post, I think it's obvious I should go to college 2 but not really knowing anybody there is what I'm most worried about.

i was incredibly scared on my first day at college cause i didnt know anybody, and i still have days where i dont really talk to anybody (although thats just me, i tend to keep to myself more) but you will meet people once you start settling in, and i take it you are going for medicine? cause at least at my college, us medics tend to talk to eachother and look out for eachother, so just introduce yourself and be friendly

[ViceVersa]

(Original post by Anonymous)
its hard not to be mean to myself when theres so much to be mean about

I understand so I can't even criticise too much otherwise I'd be hypocritical.

[Nut.]

(Original post by Anonymous)
TL;DR: angst, feel free to ignore.


I feel like my flatmates are bullying me a bit.

We're very, very different but they've always been cool with me. I get really paranoid that they talk about me behind my back, partly because they've talked about other people in our building when I'm there.

Sometimes I feel a bit excluded because the guys all do things together, and all the other girls are very close. They'll go out together and sit in each others' rooms watching films and talking all night, and I don't get asked to join. Most of the time I just sit in my room, but I'm content doing that.

Everyone's very lazy about washing up. I've taken to keeping a couple of bowls, plates and cutlery in my room, so that I'll always have clean things when I need them. I wash them up in the sink in my room too. Every time you go into the kitchen there's a huge heap of dirty plates on the side, and no one cleans them. A couple of times I've washed them out of sheer bloody frustration, but seeing as they're not mine, I don't see why I should have to.

I stuck a note to the wall about the sink asking them to wash up and then went out for a walk in the snow, and when I came back they'd written all over it:
"Did some, the rest is yours!" (They'd washed up one plate and a saucepan)
"Only when you stop doing stinky s**ts"
They turned a smiley face into a cartoon of a guy I slept with last semester (they all know about it and make jokes about it all the time, when really I just want to forget about it because the guy and I are no longer speaking).

I'm just really hurt by that all (particularly the s*** comment - I have IBS and genuinely can't help it, though I use air freshener and try to time it with my showers because the smell of the shampoo hides it as I'm really self conscious about it (and so haven't told anyone)). I'm starving but don't want to go back into the kitchen in case they're all there.

I shouldn't be taking it so hard but I just want to cry.

I'm really glad I'm not living with them next year (I'll be with coursemates instead).

I could have written this myself (except that I don't have IBS and haven't had sex in 2 years () ).

My flatmates never invite me to play FIFA with them or watch a film, or even knock on my door when they go to the pub to watch the football, even though they know I love football and playing pool.
I can't socialise with them in the evenings because they're blind drunk by 7pm and they're all rowdy and a couple of them have competitions about who can punch the fridge the hardest and leave the deepest dent and I just find it all very intimidating.
I don't go into the kitchen at all after about 5pm. I've taken to draining a can of tuna in my bathroom and just eating that for dinner then rinsing everything in my sink.

We don't have much in common. I like rock and metal music mostly, though I listen to some of the stuff they do. I don't appreciate my floor and ceiling vibrating because of dubstep being played at 2am, however.
They let stuff go mushy and mouldy in the fridge, leave open packets of raw meat in there and don't wash up for days, so I don't have anything in the fridge at all now. Stopped drinking milk, living off tinned fish, eggs and veg.

Our flat keeps getting warnings from the cleaner about the mess in the sink, and they're actually considering paying £30 a week for her to just wash up all the stuff in the sink, expecting me to contribute as though it's a group decision, when the only kitchen stuff I own is a wok and a couple of spatulas and they are always clean and in my room.
Urgh.

I imagine they've started looking for a house for next year by now. They haven't told me anything about it. Doesn't really matter, because I've decided to stay on campus so I'm near all the services and things that I'll need, but they don't know that, and it hurts that they just don't seem to give a damn.

[Anonymous]

(Original post by ViceVersa)
I understand so I can't even criticise too much otherwise I'd be hypocritical.

i cant even bring myself to start taking the anti-spasmodics the doctor told me to take because that would mean the start of a life of living with this stupid health condition

[ViceVersa]

(Original post by Anonymous)
i cant even bring myself to start taking the anti-spasmodics the doctor told me to take because that would mean the start of a life of living with this stupid health condition

Part of the issue I had with the AD so I understand.


Eventually you must take them though...you can't run away from this forever hunni. The sooner you take them the better

[Anonymous]

(Original post by ViceVersa)
Part of the issue I had with the AD so I understand.


Eventually you must take them though...you can't run away from this forever hunni. The sooner you take them the better

theyre not even drugs, theyre concentrated peppermint oil or something, all i keep thinking is how i dont want to get trapped into a life of having to take a pill three times a day every day for the rest of my life.

whats worse is how concerned the doctor was that it might be something much worse.

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Anonymous)

i was incredibly scared on my first day at college cause i didnt know anybody, and i still have days where i dont really talk to anybody (although thats just me, i tend to keep to myself more) but you will meet people once you start settling in, and i take it you are going for medicine? cause at least at my college, us medics tend to talk to eachother and look out for eachother, so just introduce yourself and be friendly

I don't want to be the centre of this massive friend group or anything, just a few friends who I can sit with and maybe go out with at weekends. I'll be polite and respond when people talk to me but I know I wont put myself out there.

I was going to go for medicine but I'm not so sure anymore. I'm far too shy to be a doctor, would never get on the course and my current grades are definitely not up to it.

[ViceVersa]

(Original post by Anonymous)
theyre not even drugs, theyre concentrated peppermint oil or something, all i keep thinking is how i dont want to get trapped into a life of having to take a pill three times a day every day for the rest of my life.

whats worse is how concerned the doctor was that it might be something much worse.

I know what you mean. It will be tough and I wish this wasn't happening to you

Hopefully it won't be

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Nut.)
I could have written this myself (except that I don't have IBS and haven't had sex in 2 years () ).

My flatmates never invite me to play FIFA with them or watch a film, or even knock on my door when they go to the pub to watch the football, even though they know I love football and playing pool.
I can't socialise with them in the evenings because they're blind drunk by 7pm and they're all rowdy and a couple of them have competitions about who can punch the fridge the hardest and leave the deepest dent and I just find it all very intimidating.
I don't go into the kitchen at all after about 5pm. I've taken to draining a can of tuna in my bathroom and just eating that for dinner then rinsing everything in my sink.

We don't have much in common. I like rock and metal music mostly, though I listen to some of the stuff they do. I don't appreciate my floor and ceiling vibrating because of dubstep being played at 2am, however.
They let stuff go mushy and mouldy in the fridge, leave open packets of raw meat in there and don't wash up for days, so I don't have anything in the fridge at all now. Stopped drinking milk, living off tinned fish, eggs and veg.

Our flat keeps getting warnings from the cleaner about the mess in the sink, and they're actually considering paying £30 a week for her to just wash up all the stuff in the sink, expecting me to contribute as though it's a group decision, when the only kitchen stuff I own is a wok and a couple of spatulas and they are always clean and in my room.
Urgh.

I imagine they've started looking for a house for next year by now. They haven't told me anything about it. Doesn't really matter, because I've decided to stay on campus so I'm near all the services and things that I'll need, but they don't know that, and it hurts that they just don't seem to give a damn.

At the moment the only food I have in my room is nutella and hobnobs. (Normally I have crisps and cereal bars and things too, but I haven't been shopping in a while). Sucks, because I'm trying to eat healthily.

They invite me to go out, but I always get pushed out to one side and so end up dancing on my own, which is horrible. I've gone home early every time we've gone out in the last 3 months, as soon as I get left I just walk back by myself.

We keep getting threats from Security about the mattress in the kitchen. I have no idea where it came from, I think they might have stolen it from another flat on a night out, but we got written warnings saying we'd be charged a lot if it wasn't gone within a week... and it's still sitting there. No one's even thought about getting rid of it yet. I can't spare £300 over a bloody mattress, y'know?

[Exopaladin]

Sorta wonder if I'll ever react normally to a medication. Pretty sure Seroquel is making me less hungry. Also pretty sure I either hallucenated last night or dreamed about hallucenating. On the plus side, mania is mostly gone, although I'm still feeling a bit nocturnal.

[Saffie]

(Original post by Sabertooth)
I got on the scales today...lost 13lbs, what's the point in looking good if you're blind?

I don't know what you're taking or the side effects of it. But if its affecting your vision then stop it?? I know you've taken loads of different meds but obviously losing your sight isnt worth it.

& well done, 13 pounds is a lot!

[FuzzySheep]

NSPCC are going to send someone round from children's services to get a full assessment, and make sure they keep an eye on my sister if/when I go to uni as I don't trust my mum.

Am going to speak to someone on Monday about housing stuff and what I can do to get out of here, fingers crossed it goes okay.

[outworn]

I got a job!

Love working, now I have a huuge reason to keep positive

[Anonymous]

(Original post by Anonymous)
I don't want to be the centre of this massive friend group or anything, just a few friends who I can sit with and maybe go out with at weekends. I'll be polite and respond when people talk to me but I know I wont put myself out there.

I was going to go for medicine but I'm not so sure anymore. I'm far too shy to be a doctor, would never get on the course and my current grades are definitely not up to it.

i completely understand, a massive friendship group would not be my idea of fun either. in fact, i dont see the majority of my friends at my new school unless im at school.

what are your grades like? to a certain extent, the views of GCSEs on tsr is somewhat skewed, so dont go by everything they say.

(Original post by ViceVersa)
I know what you mean. It will be tough and I wish this wasn't happening to you

Hopefully it won't be

ive read in some places that people grow out of it, like, they still have it and it still flares up now and then, but that will be rarely and most of the time they forget they have it. im hoping im one of those people.

[FuzzySheep]

(Original post by outworn)
I got a job!

Love working, now I have a huuge reason to keep positive

Well done!

[Saffie]

(Original post by ViceVersa)
Part of the issue I had with the AD so I understand.


Eventually you must take them though...you can't run away from this forever hunni. The sooner you take them the better

I hope you're taking your ADs?? Think you should try them.. they might help!