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Why do I suddenly hate my best friend?

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    I've known my best friend for around 8 years now, and I've been at least normal with him throughout that period, but now I'm suddenly finding him really annoying and irritating, I don't know what's wrong with me, or maybe it is him. His personality kinda changed a year or so ago, and ever since it's just really irritated me. He's a nice person although he can say some not so nice things sometimes. He's just one of those people those kind of excitable annoying at the moment, everything he says just goes through me, and his personality just seems like forced happiness (he says he is happy all the time, and says constant weird stuff to do with that), it just seems so fake though. He is very arrogant and you can never win an argument with him, he always thinks he is right about everything, a trait which my other friends have noticed and don't like. Part of me just wants him to leave me alone which is really strange because I don't have that many friends. Any advice? (I know it's very situational.)
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    I know how you feel. People who you're closest too eventually become so close that you pick out flaws that generally, no-one else spots, obviously apart from your friend's arrogance. All you gotta' do is try and ignore it; he might get the message and approach you to ask what's wrong, or maybe (if you feel brave enough!) just have a word with him. If it all backfires, don't worry. The best of friends find ways around the toughest of situations!
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    LOL. I have the exact same scenario but my friend's a girl. I've known her for 8 years, we've had ups and downs, but lately she irritates me sooo much! One day I love her, but the next day she gets on my nut. Arrogance etc. Either your friend's changed or you've "grown out" of your friendship. As we grow up, just like our bodies change; emotions change, and stuff like that - our friendships change as well. You may well have enjoyed his company for the last 8 years, but he'll definately change in that 8 year period, especially if you're talking during teen years. You will also change, not a bad one necessarily, but you will like and dislike different things. He might have noticed this change in you too? I know I've changed in 8 years. I used to be a shy, but immature girl. Now I'm pretty outgoing, and have definately matured!
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    (Original post by Nistar)
    I know how you feel. People who you're closest too eventually become so close that you pick out flaws that generally, no-one else spots, obviously apart from your friend's arrogance. All you gotta' do is try and ignore it; he might get the message and approach you to ask what's wrong, or maybe (if you feel brave enough!) just have a word with him. If it all backfires, don't worry. The best of friends find ways around the toughest of situations!
    That is so true.
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    My best friend annoys me sometimes as she is very self-centred and talks constantly about herself, but when that happens I just try to spend a small amount of time away from her and then I feel better :dontknow: her pros far outweigh her cons though and nobody's perfect.
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    Maybe it's a sign that you're growing apart? I ended my friendship with someone after years and now we're both perfectly happy apart. We now have friends who share our very different interests etc.
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    that is the problem with being best friends - you know them so well, the small niggles become glaringly obvious...
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    Feel the same about one of my bestfriends too...
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    (Original post by Tomstar42)
    I've known my best friend for around 8 years now, and I've been at least normal with him throughout that period, but now I'm suddenly finding him really annoying and irritating, I don't know what's wrong with me, or maybe it is him. His personality kinda changed a year or so ago, and ever since it's just really irritated me. He's a nice person although he can say some not so nice things sometimes. He's just one of those people those kind of excitable annoying at the moment, everything he says just goes through me, and his personality just seems like forced happiness (he says he is happy all the time, and says constant weird stuff to do with that), it just seems so fake though. He is very arrogant and you can never win an argument with him, he always thinks he is right about everything, a trait which my other friends have noticed and don't like. Part of me just wants him to leave me alone which is really strange because I don't have that many friends. Any advice? (I know it's very situational.)
    Talk to him - it's the only way forward. Otherwise you definitely will lose him if you hate him
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    People grow apart. There's nothing wrong with distancing yourself a bit.
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    I lost one of my bestfriends because he changed, and he did change, I think he thought he needed to act more tough and gained this strange fake "confidence", his entire outlook on everything changed from one of openness and acceptance to closed off and arrogantly objectful.

    I'm now at Uni so I rarely see him now anyway, it's really great when I do see him usually because it's been a while lots of catching up to do etc, strangely enough he seems to be coming down from this state he has been in over the past couple years but I don't know if he is totally or if it will last.

    My advice to you is, become independent enough to not need to rely on others, this is mainly my way of thinking and although I know isn't always the best way, it is the way I recommend to you in the sense of getting enough space from this friend, you may just need more time apart and not talk as much.. it's the same with relationships, it's good to be close but you are still individuals, and should go through life as such, always.
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    I know what you mean. I wouldn't say 'stop being his friend' because that seems childish and unnecessary - friends are a great thing to have and you are far better off keeping on general good terms. However, some time away from him would probably do you good, if it won't 'offend' him. You may well even have a stronger friendship at the end of it.

    On the other hand, you may just be growing apart, in which case maybe you should let it happen? It's up to you. I would stay in touch though because you still have that shared history, and plenty of teenagers go through that fake and arrogant phase then turn into perfectly decent adults.
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    I recently broke up with a best friend, and whilst he had changed and become somebody I didn't know, the friendship had also changed. There was a difference in maturity, and perhaps that is the problem here.

    It sounds to me like the pair of you are going your separate ways. You have different interests now and the friendship is coming to an end. If I were you, I would just spend some time away from him and see how things are. You may get closer, or you may drift apart further.
    #1

    I have a similar problem. I met my best friend at 16. Initially we were part of a large friendship group. She decided that she no longer wanted to be part of that group. She persuaded me to do the same and as I was an easily influenced individual at the time, like a little sheep, I followed.

    Everything was fine for a year or so but she began grating on me. She was extremely self-centred and constantly sought attention. As soon as she got a boyfriend it was like our relationship went out the window. At the time I hadn't "blossomed" (for want of a better word). At the end of college she decided to go to the local ex-poly but I wanted something more.

    During my college years I suffered much emotional turmoil. None of this she knew about. So, I didn't do as well as I could have. I decided to turn that around and go back to college instead. From then we kind of grew apart.

    She texted me a couple of times but I didn't feel comfortable speaking to her. I bumped into her a while back and I felt guilty for some reason. Somehow she had manipulated the situation and made me believe I was in the wrong. I ended up texting her and saying how sorry I was!!

    Anyway, since then I have grown and matured as a person. I have realised that the only person I must please is MYSELF!

    So, OP, do what you feel comfortable with. Don't feel obliged to continue keeping in contact with your friend if you don't want to.

    Good luck.
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    HAH thought I was the only one, it's come to the point that now his sheer presence bugs me, and I prefer nights out with out him, I think it's safe to say were not best friends any more, but there's so much history there
    he's a good lad though, it's not his fault he's gotta face begging to be slapped :P
    we haven't even had a falling out or anything, just drifted apart, different interests I guess
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    [QUOTE=Tomstar42;36212663]
    First of all, Im new to this so if I send it wrong I'm sorry and more importantly I know how you feel! My best friend came to my house once and messed up my kitchen, made fun of my dreams, ripped paper in my room and cut up my favourite book. As you can probably tell, I was annoyed. She didn't seem herself because she was very - how do I put this? - hyper. I gave myself some space from her and didn't go out with her for a few days. It was fine after that. She seemed to settle down. Try that!

    Trust xxx
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    Maybe you're jealous of your friend's boyfriend, it usually comes down to that.
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    Definitely happened with my best friend, shortly after GCSE he got offered a place at sixth form despite not reaching the 5A*-C requirement, yet he declines it and is now unemployed, all he does it play video games and just the lack of ambition kinda makes me hate him. Likewise a few other of my friends have merged with the cool crowd, so I'm with a new group of friends at sixth form, but generally its better to find new people if you don't like hanging out with your current friends. No doubt at uni I'll meet yet another group of friends and that's life I'm afraid. Also has anyone have to deal with overly childish friends? I don't know making screaming noises or linking videos of screaming noises or anything of the sort doesn't really make me chuckle at all

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