[Twixwrapper]

I'm sort of in this position now where I know nothing good can come of what I'm doing but I cant stop.

I broke up with her mid-october last year, I spent 3 days phoning texting banging on her door when she called the police in. The police wanted her to press charges over the harrasement she said no, but they warned me never to contact her again her mother told me she never want to speak to me again.

My problem is I cant stop thinking about her, the mistakes I've made. I think of her pretty much 24:7 I'm failing uni, on the verge of the sack from my job because all I do is think of her, randomly bust into tears or go into emotional rages. I'm now 3 days without any sleep whatsover and when i do sleep I'm dreaming of her I think of her all the time and I'm desperate to phone her but if I do I'll probably lose everything.

Last week I spent all my savings 1.5k on a ring, I want to go ask her to marry me it seems like the only way to have some sort of sanity...

What do I do how do I break out of this, people suggest move on I've tried. It's impossible to meet someone else when even when you try your hardest you end up talking about your ex, or you reject that person out of hand entirely because they cant compare to her.

[Twixwrapper]

A little more info to make this a bit cleared, we where together for two years the reason she broke up with me was because she got pregnant and didnt know what do, say or how to tell me she was going to have an abortion. I didnt know this at the time was angry, confused and upset and went and made things a lot worse by acting all crazy.
And now I've got myself into the situation where I love someone I can never see again...