Results are out! Find what you need...fast. Get quick advice or join the chat
Hey there Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Going home for Weekends

Announcements Posted on
Applying to Uni? Let Universities come to you. Click here to get your perfect place 20-10-2014
  • View Poll Results: How often do you go home?
    Every weekend
    16
    9.41%
    Every other weekend
    12
    7.06%
    Every few weeks
    24
    14.12%
    Monthly
    18
    10.59%
    Once a term
    35
    20.59%
    Only in Holidays
    65
    38.24%

    • 8 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    Since coming to uni in September I've been home twice - once for my dad's birthday in November for a night midweek and once for the Christmas holidays. I only live 40 minutes away so my parents come to Newcastle for shopping every month or so so I see them then, so it doesn't bother me at all. I'm away with societies quite a lot of weekends and there is always something going on so I'd rather not miss out whilst I have the chance! Plus there is literally nothing to do where I live, and all of my friends live 2-3 hours from my home.

    Within my flat it varies.. we have 2 international students who obviously only go home in the holidays, one person who only goes home in the holidays because train tickets are so expensive and he lives far away, another who goes home every 3-4 weeks and another who goes home every 1-2 weeks (she lives very close by).

    Just depends
    • 20 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    I go once a term. It's really nice to have all the comforts of home and recharge for a weekend but I think I'd miss out on a lot of social stuff if I went home more often than that.
    • 1 follower
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    Holidays only! At Uni I've either got loadsa work or loadsa socialising to do- home is boring as all my friends are also at other uni's and isn't exactly cheap to get there are back just for 2 days.
    • 4 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    Because if you bugger off home every weekend, when do you hang out with your friends at uni (assuming you made new friends)?
    As for family, just talk to them on the phone or skype and learn to be interdependent. Running back to mummy and daddy every weekend is missing the point about living away from home.
    Tbh, I always take the first 3 weeks of September off work and hardly anything happens here at the weekend. People go out on weekdays, I see my friends on weekdays?! There's nothing wrong if you wanna stay at uni at the weekends but I don't see why you have to be such a prick about people who do go home?

    Speaking on skype/the phone is hardly the same as seeing my friends in person. I took two gap years to go travelling (living away from mummy & daddy shock horror!) so most of my friends have graduated by now and are at home working full time - going out on the weekends, so why wouldn't I try to get a bit of both worlds and go out with them too?
    • 9 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Samz)
    Tbh, I always take the first 3 weeks of September off work and hardly anything happens here at the weekend. People go out on weekdays, I see my friends on weekdays?! There's nothing wrong if you wanna stay at uni at the weekends but I don't see why you have to be such a prick about people who do go home?

    Speaking on skype/the phone is hardly the same as seeing my friends in person. I took two gap years to go travelling (living away from mummy & daddy shock horror!) so most of my friends have graduated by now and are at home working full time - going out on the weekends, so why wouldn't I try to get a bit of both worlds and go out with them too?
    Wut?
    People go out on the weekdays but not weekends? I think that begs the question what course is everyone doing as I know many people including myself who couldn't do that.

    Also, why do you need to see your friends so much? Don't you have new friends at uni? Why are all your friends still at home and not around the country working, because I can't imagine that you live in some magical town where all the best jobs are, and surely you can just catch up with them during holidays? Unless of course you are afraid that they will forget you if you don't see and talk to them every waking minute.
    • 1 follower
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    Wut?
    People go out on the weekdays but not weekends? I think that begs the question what course is everyone doing as I know many people including myself who couldn't do that.
    I know here all the big student nights in town are on weekday nights. And by big, I mean cheap. Besides, I have 9am starts every day and still manage it! Plus, spending time with friends doesn't necessarily mean a night out, it can just be spending a bit of time at each others house/flat or whatever. I'm sure most people have time for that during the week.

    Personally, I go home once a month. I only live 45 minutes from uni anyway, so it's a nice balance of popping home and getting some yummy food/catching up with the parents and maintaining independence despite being so close to home.
    • 9 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Lucyyy)
    I know here all the big student nights in town are on weekday nights. And by big, I mean cheap. Besides, I have 9am starts every day and still manage it! Plus, spending time with friends doesn't necessarily mean a night out, it can just be spending a bit of time at each others house/flat or whatever. I'm sure most people have time for that during the week.

    Personally, I go home once a month. I only live 45 minutes from uni anyway, so it's a nice balance of popping home and getting some yummy food/catching up with the parents and maintaining independence despite being so close to home.
    Everywhere has student nights during the weekday, but what about meeting your friends during the day time, and maybe without having to get drunk? :curious: What type of course means you are free during your afternoons so often that you can forgo your weekends?

    Also, how often do you speak to your parents when you are at uni, or do you wait until you go back every month to speak to them?
    • 6 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    Once a term or less during the first two years. It'll probably only be in the holidays in my final year. My Uni isn't particularly far away from my home-town, but train tickets are still expensive. I call/skype my family regularly and I didn't really stay in contact with friends from Sixth From, so I don't have much reason to go home. Most of my trips home were for gigs or hospital appointments.
    • 0 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    Wut?
    People go out on the weekdays but not weekends? I think that begs the question what course is everyone doing as I know many people including myself who couldn't do that.

    Also, why do you need to see your friends so much? Don't you have new friends at uni? Why are all your friends still at home and not around the country working, because I can't imagine that you live in some magical town where all the best jobs are, and surely you can just catch up with them during holidays? Unless of course you are afraid that they will forget you if you don't see and talk to them every waking minute.
    It's nice to go home for a change of scenery. You almost make it seem as though when you go to uni you're supposed to leave everything behind you and start again.
    • 9 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Boom Boom Pow)
    It's nice to go home for a change of scenery. You almost make it seem as though when you go to uni you're supposed to leave everything behind you and start again.
    In a sense yes, though not that extreme. Uni is a mid ground between permanently moving out and living at home. Going back home all the time to meet old friends and family seems like people are not wanting to move on and are being lazy at trying to make a new life.
    • 0 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    In a sense yes, though not that extreme. Uni is a mid ground between permanently moving out and living at home. Going back home all the time to meet old friends and family seems like people are not wanting to move on and are being lazy at trying to make a new life.
    Why should people make a new life? Unless you've had a terrible time at school/home I see uni as an addition to your life. When you get older and maybe move away to work do you just leave everything behind you and start over again? Going home on the weekend doesn't make you weak minded.
    • 9 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Boom Boom Pow)
    Why should people make a new life? Unless you've had a terrible time at school/home I see uni as an addition to your life. When you get older and maybe move away to work do you just leave everything behind you and start over again? Going home on the weekend doesn't make you weak minded.
    :facepalm:
    Because you are moving on? Sorry to break the news to you, but life doesn't stay the same and uni is the first major step in accepting that. Uni is not some addition to your life, but what your life should now revolve around.
    And yes, if you leave to work you do leave everything behind. You might stay in contact with your friends, but you will only see them every few months at best. Those who do not want to do this either end up unemployed or doing some ****ty little job and go no where with their life.
    • 6 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    Because if you bugger off home every weekend, when do you hang out with your friends at uni (assuming you made new friends)?
    As for family, just talk to them on the phone or skype and learn to be interdependent. Running back to mummy and daddy every weekend is missing the point about living away from home.
    I do agree to a certain extent. I'm not at university yet so I can't really say for definite how I'll find it and whether I'll get homesick or not but I am quite an independent person so I think I'll be ok. I've been on holiday without my family before and not been homesick or anything but I guess that's different. I think it's good to spend a little bit of time with family if you can and I'd certainly go home at christmas and easter.

    It makes me feel a little bit guilty though because my mum is saying that when she helps move me in she wants to stay in a local hotel overnight and spend the weekend with me :/... It's a lovely idea and it's nice to know incase I don't like it or whatever (I know that I wouldn't just get there and then go back home again but I get anxiety sometimes so it's nice to know that I could if I REALLY had to which I wouldn't) but at the same time I'm thinking I should be going out with my flatmates when I get there and not my mum lol.

    She's not ridiculous though, she's not expecting me to come home during term time I don't think. But my gran keeps asking me how often I'll see her because she lives with us and she's been like a 2nd mum to me since I was tiny. Also she's 81 and I hate the idea of not making the most of her last years even though I know I only live once and I need to concentrate on making the most of my life.

    I think every weekend is a bit extreme unless it's for work purposes and there's no way of getting a job where they're studying. I've read things on here before about people who apparently have their parents do all of their cooking for them and give it to them in microwaveable containers at weekends. For one of the people it involved his family members travelling from cardiff uni to coventry - where he's from. I think that's absolutely ridiculous to be honest. The excuse I remember reading was that it's because they're used to eating food that's difficult to cook... They should either learn to cook it before they go or just get unused to it and eat normal, simple food like everybody else in my opinion. They're adults, when are they going to grow up?

    Things like that do bug me when I read it but I guess it's not really hurting anyone. I think it would probably have a bit of a detrimental effect on the flat atmosphere and dynamics amongst the flatmates though because if someone is still getting their parents to do everything for them and they have their family running around after them with containers of food every weekend then they won't be able to relate to the others in the same way. It seems a bit backward to me.
    • 9 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by littleone271)
    I do agree to a certain extent. I'm not at university yet so I can't really say for definite how I'll find it and whether I'll get homesick or not but I am quite an independent person so I think I'll be ok. I've been on holiday without my family before and not been homesick or anything but I guess that's different. I think it's good to spend a little bit of time with family if you can and I'd certainly go home at christmas and easter.

    It makes me feel a little bit guilty though because my mum is saying that when she helps move me in she wants to stay in a local hotel overnight and spend the weekend with me :/... It's a lovely idea and it's nice to know incase I don't like it or whatever (I know that I wouldn't just get there and then go back home again but I get anxiety sometimes so it's nice to know that I could if I REALLY had to which I wouldn't) but at the same time I'm thinking I should be going out with my flatmates when I get there and not my mum lol.
    As kind as your mums offer is, you are right. People will want to go out and you have to go out with them for the first few weeks. If you don't, you will segregate yourself from the group and that will really screw you over.


    She's not ridiculous though, she's not expecting me to come home during term time I don't think. But my gran keeps asking me how often I'll see her because she lives with us and she's been like a 2nd mum to me since I was tiny. Also she's 81 and I hate the idea of not making the most of her last years even though I know I only live once and I need to concentrate on making the most of my life.

    I think every weekend is a bit extreme unless it's for work purposes and there's no way of getting a job where they're studying. I've read things on here before about people who apparently have their parents do all of their cooking for them and give it to them in microwaveable containers at weekends. For one of the people it involved his family members travelling from cardiff uni to coventry - where he's from. I think that's absolutely ridiculous to be honest. The excuse I remember reading was that it's because they're used to eating food that's difficult to cook... They should either learn to cook it before they go or just get unused to it and eat normal, simple food like everybody else in my opinion. They're adults, when are they going to grow up?

    Things like that do bug me when I read it but I guess it's not really hurting anyone. I think it would probably have a bit of a detrimental effect on the flat atmosphere and dynamics amongst the flatmates though because if someone is still getting their parents to do everything for them and they have their family running around after them with containers of food every weekend then they won't be able to relate to the others in the same way. It seems a bit backward to me.
    What some parents have to realise is that you are moving on and this is the first step. After uni you might move permanently to a different part of the country, so the better get use to the idea of you not being around all the time. Of course it also helps you as you learn to be independent and approach your parental relationship in a more mature manner.
    The people who have their meals precooked are the type of people who will always struggle to find house-mates and have other social problems Again, these people just need to learn to be independent.
    • 0 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    I live in a house with 5 other students and going home is really expensive for me. Everyone else seems to go home every couple of weeks though and its really annoying when the house empties out as it leaves me with nothing to do.
    • 6 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    As kind as your mums offer is, you are right. People will want to go out and you have to go out with them for the first few weeks. If you don't, you will segregate yourself from the group and that will really screw you over.
    Yeah I did kinda say to her that I'll need to go out with my flatmates when I get there and she seemed to think that because I'd have had a long day moving my stuff in I'd be too tired and nobody would want to go out... I don't really think that's necessarily true though... What do you think?



    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    What some parents have to realise is that you are moving on and this is the first step. After uni you might move permanently to a different part of the country, so the better get use to the idea of you not being around all the time. Of course it also helps you as you learn to be independent and approach your parental relationship in a more mature manner.
    The people who have their meals precooked are the type of people who will always struggle to find house-mates and have other social problems Again, these people just need to learn to be independent.
    Yeah my parents don't have a problem with me moving on. When my Mum was my age she went to art college in Leeds (she's from Brighton) and she only came home at Christmas and Summer so she does understand. I think she's just conscious of leaving me feeling abandoned on my own in an unfamiliar place. I think I'd be fine to be honest because I'm naturally very good at meeting people, making new friends and sort of getting on with it.

    I just really don't like the idea of not being around when my gran dies because she really is like a mother to me.

    When I was little she used to dress me and cook for me every day and always be there when I came home from school. She always sticks up for me if my mum or stepdad are being moody with me and makes me laugh when I'm upset, she's the only person who ever notices when I'm bottling things up, she always cooks bacon buttys for my friends when they stay over etc. She's an amazing woman and I do probably love her as much as I do my mum so yeah if something happened to her and I hadn't seen her in a few months then I'm not sure how I could live with that. Having said that, I know I have to live my life and move on and everything and I can't let my worries for her rule my life. It's not like she has cancer or anything but the thought of her dying absolutely terrifies me.
    • 6 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Tesphen)
    I live in a house with 5 other students and going home is really expensive for me. Everyone else seems to go home every couple of weeks though and its really annoying when the house empties out as it leaves me with nothing to do.
    Maybe you could join a club or something to meet more people who are in a similar situation to you and who can't afford to go home that often? At least then you'd have people to hang out with rather than being by yourself.

    And on the plus side.. if you're on your own then you can walk around naked! lol maybe not in february but when it's warmer that's always fun. Just make sure you don't get too used to it and answer the door like it lol
    • 3 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by k9markiii)
    I live about 5 hours from uni and a return by train costs £60. I don't go home during term time.
    Yeah :\ I live 4 hours away from home, I have to get 4 or 5am trains just to afford it! A return for me costs £69 in the day but £9 each way if I get a 5am train
    • 0 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    Christmas holidays and summer end of term.
    • 0 followers
    Offline

    ReputationRep:
    When I move in September I will be coming home every few weeks, when not on placement, to see my parents and my horses. No I don't see a problem with that before anyone says there is, I specifically chose my uni so that it was close enough to be able to get to my horses if there was an emergency/I wanted to and that it was far enough that I wouldn't get the urge to just nip home.

    And I will be going on a fairly regular basis because unlike most uni students I won't be getting masses of holidays due to the nature of my course.

Reply

Submit reply

Register

Thanks for posting! You just need to create an account in order to submit the post
  1. this can't be left blank
    that username has been taken, please choose another Forgotten your password?
  2. this can't be left blank
    this email is already registered. Forgotten your password?
  3. this can't be left blank

    6 characters or longer with both numbers and letters is safer

  4. this can't be left empty
    your full birthday is required
  1. By joining you agree to our Ts and Cs, privacy policy and site rules

  2. Slide to join now Processing…

Updated: March 14, 2012
New on TSR

Join the Welcome Squad

Become a part of the TSR team!

Article updates
Reputation gems:
You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.