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FOOD AND DRINK: The Yin and Yang, of THAT FOODIE THANG!

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    Has nobody had schokokuss before? You get them in lidl/aldi?
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    I need to shop in Lidl and Aldi more. I'm sorry! My Mum goes sometimes but all she seems to bring back is German sausages the size of a small submarine..
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    okay, then I'll change it to something answerable!!

    YIN AND YANG OF CADBURY DOUBLE DECKERS?
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    YIN: Just about the only coffee flavoured thing I actually like, Double Deckers are a pretty good choco choice if you're looking for indulgence. 'Whipped nougat layer, with a lower layer of cereal ‘crispies’, these are then coated in milk chocolate'. I mean, wus not ta love? Plus, if you were hungry before, you won't be now! MEAL IN ONE. I also like taking it apart and eating different bits alone. Fun with ma fooood.

    YANG: Sometimes, and maybe its just me, I find them to be a bit disappointing. It's like the layers don't really go together. Maybe its just me! I also find em pretty filling, which can be both a negative and a positive!

    YIN AND YANG OF: APPLE STRUDEL?
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    Wait, COFFEE? Dani, Double Deckers aren't coffee you nutter butter!!

    YIN: Apple Strudels are a good showcase for doing pastry RIGHT; in my opinion sometimes flaky pastry can be overwhelming, but in a lattice format it's a bit less heavy. Usually has a nice spicy kick that we in the UK are often afraid of, hence our pre-packed apple pies etc are often one-dimensionally sweet. Plus once again, it's easier to make than a proper shortcrust apple pie, but telling people you made a strudel, they are aghast in wonderment. THAT'S FANCY!!

    YANG: Sometimes it's cinnamon overload. ALSO WATCH IT WITH THE ICING SUGA...christ. Also, tried cutting the things without sending shards of pastry ALL OWER THE GAFF? Impossibubbles.


    YIN AND YANG OF TINY QUARTERED SANDWICHES AS OPPOSED TO FULL/HALVED?
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    (Original post by TotoMimo)
    Wait, COFFEE? Dani, Double Deckers aren't coffee you nutter butter!!

    YIN: Apple Strudels are a good showcase for doing pastry RIGHT; in my opinion sometimes flaky pastry can be overwhelming, but in a lattice format it's a bit less heavy. Usually has a nice spicy kick that we in the UK are often afraid of, hence our pre-packed apple pies etc are often one-dimensionally sweet. Plus once again, it's easier to make than a proper shortcrust apple pie, but telling people you made a strudel, they are aghast in wonderment. THAT'S FANCY!!

    YANG: Sometimes it's cinnamon overload. ALSO WATCH IT WITH THE ICING SUGA...christ. Also, tried cutting the things without sending shards of pastry ALL OWER THE GAFF? Impossibubbles.


    YIN AND YANG OF TINY QUARTERED SANDWICHES AS OPPOSED TO FULL/HALVED?
    Double deckers? The orange and purple Cadbury bars? They are toto! Google it!!!

    And
    YIN: Bite size and funsized! It's four times the fun! It also means the sandwich lasts longer, feels daintier and you can, if available, mix and match different fillings at a buffet!

    YANG: i always feel hungry after a few, even 4, it just SEEMS like you've eaten less. It promotes the greed!

    YIN AND YANG OF ALCOHOL IN DESSERTS
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    Yin: I know loads of people that outright refuse a boozy pud, but Cointreau, port, Sherry or Baileys can add real richness to a pud without being burny throaty, guys. Plus, SPECTACULAR. You get to PUT THE CAKE ON FIRE with alcohol! Also, want a bit, kids? SORRY, IT'S ALL FOR THE ADULTS, YA WEE BASTICH, *num num*

    Yang: alcohol hates gelatine. Many attempts by rookies at vodka jellies and sherry trifles can testify this!! Also, explaining to parents why all the kids are staggering about because you put absinthe in the cake. "You said I was to make a cake to get Thomas tanked!"... "No, I said to bake a cake WITH Thomas the Tank. He's four, you monster."



    YIN AND YANG OF THE HEEL END OF THE BREAD?
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    YIN: Can be used as a weapon if your house is being burgled. No I jest, I actually like the heely end, not many people do. It's a tad bit thicker than other pieces, making it perfect for things like beans on toast, or making eggy bread. Sometimes thickness is better! Plus, if we're talking French Stick, added CRUNCH factor, and its always the bit to go if I was in charge of carrying the French Stick in the supermarket. OH, and, heel end = freshness keeper. Like the gatekeeper of heaven, warding away all that unwanted staleness. God bless you st.heelypeter.

    YANG: If you just want a piece of toast, or a sandwich, it's like jeeeze, I wanted a piece of bread not half a loaf! With cheapy bread, it's not as nice to munch on, whereas Tiger Bread and French Stick it's great, Tesco's own value loaf ain-so-tasty.

    YIN AND YANG OF: MICROWAVE PASTA READY MEALS
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    YIN: No boiling of water, no seasoning said water, no over or underportioning. If you're anything like me you go, "Ach, that's hardly ANY spaghetti..." then you put another ten fistfuls in and wonder why your entire house is exploding with starch. Plus if you consider the extras, like veg, sauce, meat - and they're not often sold in handy "bachelor size jars " etc, either - a ready meal is a super-cheap faff-buster.

    YANG: Like Al Dente? NOT TODAY, YOU DON'T. You're getting AL MUSHTY and you'll LIKE it. In direct contrast to the YIN point I made; if it's for multiple people, it's not cost effective either. Finally, your Come Dine With Me guests will have a hissy fit because you didn't make ever ATOM from scratch, and pasta is an "easy meal" anyway.


    YIN AND YANG OF: BAGELS?
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    YIN: If you're bored you could attempt to throw them onto a vertical pole



    YANG: The bread is too dense for my liking and the shape is not particularly ideal for fillings.

    Yin and Yang of McD's quarter pounder with cheese?
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    Yin: I like the buns of McD burgers, and the smell is enough to make me smile. It just evokes good times when you've got that McDonalds in your grips! I LOVE DA GHERK.

    Yang: I'm sure they get smaller every year. Once I remember ordering "a 1/4 pounder with cheese" and they asked me, "do I want cheese?"
    Erm..yes. And I'd like some chicken nuggets, with chicken ta.
    Plus, when going McD's I usually like a chicken burger.

    Yin and yang of Fruit Pastilles ice lollies
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    YIN: It has a diverse range of deliciously fruity flavours, and makes for an uber refreshing ICEY treat on a hot day.


    YANG: Because of its firmness it can require considerable effort to bite into.

    YIN and YANG of HEINZ BEANS WITH PORK SAUSAGES
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    YIN: Those mini sausages are epic. And with beans, it's like a treasure hunt! Makes meal time fun! It's just tasty, lets be honest here.

    YANG: Heinz means you double the price. Plus, I like ma sausages with sghetti, though beans are good, gimme hoopy goodness instead and I'll be much happier. Also I like to have spoonfuls with both components, and there just aint enough sausages to go around!

    YIN AND YANG OF HOMEMADE NACHOS
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    homemade? YOU MAKE CORN TORTILLA CHIPS??

    Or do you mean "open a bag of crisps and put cheese on it"?
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    OH here he goes again. This is so classic, Arnold and Helga.
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    OKAY, OKAY. SHEESH. you try to be anal for ELEVEN HOURS and it's a crime.

    YIN: It's as easy as putting cheese on a bag of crisps. You get to cast up later that you "provided food for the film/game; this entitles you to get drinks out of people
    Also, by making them, you know where the biggest, baddest reserves of cheese lie... BAGSY THAT BIT!

    YANG: Melissa moans at me. There are a million more impressive things to prepare at equal effort for greater reward. The addition of liquidy salsas etc ruins the whole crunchy point of nachos. Watching someone pull the EPIC MAJORITY CHEESE NACHO from your grasp.... Noooooo!!


    YIN AND YANG OF... BLUE-TOP MILK?
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    Okay, no responses for that, how about the...

    YIN AND YANG OF ICE CREAM FROM A CONE INSTEAD OF A CUP?
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    YIN: It's like a PROPER ice cream that way. In a cone means its straight from the scoop, be it the ice cream man himself, or from a ice cream stall you passed and just HAD to indulge. Also, if you're lucky enough to get a waffle cone, you hit the jackpot son! None of this wafer rubbish, you got a treat on a treat! Waffle cones rule all, chewy sweet delight.

    YANG: Sun, ice cream, cone = sticky hand syndrome! You gotta eat it quick else it's gonna melt. And I like to savour my treats! Also, we've all see the tragic pictures of kids who've managed to drop the ice cream and are left with just the cone. Now that's a sad sight. Stick with a cup and you avoid this evil. Especially if you're just left with a wafer cone. Crap, flavourless, watery nothingness.

    YIN AND YANG OF CHOPPED DRIED DATES INSTEAD OF WHOLE DATES?
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    YIN: Cutting dates is, admittedly even for a brutish lad like me, more tough than it should be, and when you're making a fruit cake it takes LONG ENOUGH. You can convince your nephew to eat them far easier as they don't look like "doggy's dunna poopoo" in chopped form.

    YANG: Dates like medjool (my fave) have that "first bite of honey" when whole... You don't get that in chopped. Also, come on; Dates are like an "I'll have one or two" fruit before you bore of them... That's why your gran always have that half eaten tray of EAT ME dates. A whole bag of chopped ones is perhaps optimism.



    YIN AND YANG OF DAIM/DIME BARS?
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    YIN: You don't get that taste anywhere else. It's all buttery almondy chocolatey goodness, and it packs a good CRUNCH. It's not like you can say ah they don't have dime, its cool, I'll have a 'x'. There's no replacement for that almond choc!

    YANG: It packs a crunch alright, I no longer have any teeth. But it's cool, the ones I do have are now glued together with bits of Dime which, no matter how much I try - tongue or finger use - will NOT come out. Saving it for later.. yeah.. that's what I'm doing....

    YIN AND YANG OF FLIPZ OVER M&S CHOC PRETZELS

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