Why do people dislike the Alpha Male tag?

why is it bad to be confident and assured?

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The term Alpha Male suggests to me a guy that's cocky and needs to always be the best and thinks he's better than everyone else. That's why I dislike it.

Reply 2

minniiee

confidence = good
arrogance = bad
theres a fine line...

Reply 3

sambraas

I'm using the PUA definition, which to me seems reasoned enough.

Reply 4

py0alb

Do they?

I suppose I'm what you'd call an alpha male, I don't really see the problem.

Reply 5

masterfulprof

The label is a problem. Girls resent it...because they feel like playthings for alpha males. But then they're the ones that confer "alpha" status by their actions in dating/mating with such males..go figure. Males hate it because those who aren't, feel victimized and resentful of the success of those who are.

The label is a very thin description for a more complex phenomenon. It sounds like the thing an 18-year old would learn in Psych101.

Reply 6

Dragonfly07

Because in the majority of cases, people who think they're alpha male are usually mistaken. They're loud/arrogant in order to hide insecurities/put on a front to boost their own ego.

When you meet a real alpha person, male or female, you'll know

Reply 7

Dark Horse

Original post by Dragonfly07

I 100% concur.

The difference between being confident and self-assured is a million miles away from being insecurely bold.

Reply 8

sil3nt_cha0s

In my opinion, an alpha male (in social/everyday situations) is a guy who gets his own way but at the same time everyone likes him and wants to be around him. In essence, he is a great leader. Usually he'll be good looking, tall, broad and masculine, but not necessarily. Being a dick and everyone hating you =/= alpha male.

But you could apply alpha male to other situations I guess. Some people apply it to a guy who gets all the girls, some people apply it to guys who are the best fighters, others apply it to guys who make the most money.

Reply 9

py0alb

Original post by sil3nt_cha0s

Normally these things are correlated. It's not difficult to recognise the alpha male(s) of any group. They're the most popular and confident, they automatically slide into the leadership roles, they often seem to be the smartest/most talented, and they get the majority of female attention.

and yeah, funnily enough they are often quite tall and fairly well built - although rarely gym bunnies.

Reply 10

FrostyLemon

Because if you were really 'alpha' you wouldn't have to go around claiming you are. You certainly wouldn't ****ing read PUA books either.

Reply 11

Science211

The term Alpha has been messed up. I see alpha as someone who puts themselves first hence the ALPHA (Number 1 in Greek). I see it as a procedure of improving yourself and making yourself better and making yourself the best. People may call that Arrogance but i think its making yourself happy which is what life is about.

Follow your dreams and do what you want not what anyone else wants. By being confident, not scared and being the best you can be is what is required to be Alpha :biggrin:

Reply 12

playlislay

Original post by Science211

Yes but then you get people who 'think' they are the best. That's what people don't like. You can normally tell if a bloke feels like something special when all they really are are hot-headed humans!

Reply 13

Simplicity

Because it's just a stupid term to describe someone who pulls a lot of girls.

Reply 14

Mm_Minty

Because the people who use the term "alpha male" are usually douchebags.

Reply 15

Lucia.

Original post by sil3nt_cha0s

In my opinion, an alpha male (in social/everyday situations) is a guy who gets his own way but at the same time everyone likes him and wants to be around him.

Definitely this. Alpha males tend to have a certain magneticism where they are able to draw people to them and direct social situations and conversations. In a group setting other men look up to them and let them take the lead. They don't have to assert themselves excessively to lead; much of it comes from charm and natural presence.

Original post by FrostyLemon

Because if you were really 'alpha' you wouldn't have to go around claiming you are. You certainly wouldn't ****ing read PUA books either.

I totally agree. I'm really not a fan of the PUA stuff or any kind of affected behaviour. A true gentleman is confident in such a way that his classiness is effortless and not put on at all.