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FOOD AND DRINK: The DINNER JINX!

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    The Dinner Jinx saw you were eating Pork Scratchings at the bar and has stumbled over, spilling your pint on them. They are now Pork Squelchies.


    How will Dinner Jinx ruin my PANCAKES?
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    it will make the pancake tear in half whilst also still uncooked on one side, when you're trying to flip it.

    how are my beans on toast with cheese going to be ruined?
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    You've left it a tad too long, the beans have gone cold and the bread is DAMN soggy.


    Ruin my: Chocolate Fondant and salted caramel ice cream dessert?
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    it hurts me to do this...

    your fondant it not a fondant. nor is it squidgy cake. oh no, you've cooked it too slow and too long and it's utterly dried out.
    the egg yolk in the icecream curdled when you made it, so the texture is all grainy.

    sorry

    ruin my BBQ grilled chicken drumsticks?
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    Dinner Jinx made sure it's your overzealous, enthusiastic Barbecue-Dad that cooked them for you. You now have raw meat and CARBON SKIN.

    How will Dinner Jinx ruin my FRENCH BREAD PIZZA?
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    (Original post by TotoMimo)
    Dinner Jinx made sure it's your overzealous, enthusiastic Barbecue-Dad that cooked them for you. You now have raw meat and CARBON SKIN.

    How will Dinner Jinx ruin my FRENCH BREAD PIZZA?
    Your bread centre is stale and you left it in the oven too long, meaning there's an almost black crust which is impossible to bite or cut through. Also, the cow went on strike and you got only a TINY portion of cheese.

    Ruin my toad in the hole?
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    Dinner Jinx used the classic Toad in the Hole trickery - he made you believe your Toadie was ready by giving you golden brown pudding pastry and wonderfully charred sausages poking up.

    You've turned off the oven, and you're serving up.

    Cut through it...

    The bottom is a soggy, disgusting custard and the underside of the sausages are pink. CURSE YOU DECEPTIVE DINNER JINX!*


    *PS, does this happen to other people, or am I just a bag of poo?


    HOW CAN DINNER JINX POSSIBLY RUIN: My GREEK YOGHURT?
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    it's been left opened and has absorbed the flavours from the onion and garlic for you.
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    ruin my cherry crumble?
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    Dinner Jinx has used CHERRY ESSENCE in its construction and now it tastes like FREAKING MEDICINE!!

    How will Dinner Jinx ruin my Pico de Gallo?
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    Poor food arithmetic has attacked your food and you're left with an overly onioned, incredibly garlicy salsa. This seems to be common among fake Mexican restaurants, wanting to be authentic and failing miserably.


    Ruin my... Chocolate profiteroles?
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    Mmm. The lovely synthetic foam-cream inside them has slightly frozen then thawed, producing a runny white substance which has created a perimeter of SOG. Yum. CHEERS DINNER JINX.

    How will dinner jinx ruin my: PASTRAMI SANDWICH?
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    (Original post by TotoMimo)
    Mmm. The lovely synthetic foam-cream inside them has slightly frozen then thawed, producing a runny white substance which has created a perimeter of SOG. Yum. CHEERS DINNER JINX.

    How will dinner jinx ruin my: PASTRAMI SANDWICH?
    Someone else made it for you and they're one of those sinful MAYO and BUTTER happy folk. It was thick with butter, making holes in your bread, and so much mayo it was coming out at the sides when you bite in and the pastrami was all sliding about. EUGH.

    Ruin my..bowl of cheerios
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    The Cheerios were left open too long in the cupboard and they're all stale and hard. And no amount of milk absorption is gonna reverse that!

    Ruin my: Cottage Pie?
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    (Original post by dani_1991)
    The Cheerios were left open too long in the cupboard and they're all stale and hard. And no amount of milk absorption is gonna reverse that!

    Ruin my: Cottage Pie?
    The Dinner Jinx has ejaculated into the cottage pie's mash, and concealed the flavour by also adding lots of salt.

    How will the Dinner Jinx ruin my: EGGS BENEDICT.
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    The Dinner Jinx has not only used the most dire of water-pumped generic supermarket ham, but your poacher is HARD BOILED. Oh, and the Hollandaise sauce? Wasn't stirred continuously. Lumps aplenty. Dinner Jinx went to TOWN on you, bro.


    How will dinner Jinx ruin my BEEF WELLINGTON?
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    mushrooms made the pastry soggy, easy peasy. then you burnt it. and the fillet is overcooked. whoops!

    ruin my greggs sausage roll?
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    The Dinner Jinx tried to be nice for once and give you a pipin' pastry but got a bit trigger-happy with the microwave. Buh-bye sausage roll, hello Soggy Hell.
    How oh how will the Dinner Jinx stylishlyruin my old man's sublime Apple Crumble and Custard?
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    It was warm, and its now gone cold. Cue soggy pastry and broken dreams.

    Ruin my: Scone with cream and strawberry jam


    EDIT:

    There's not enough sugar in ya crumble and its FAR too bitter.

    Ruin my: Scone with cream and strawberry jam
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    The scones are underbaked and now you're left with crumbly exterior but pure stodgy dough on the inside! Also the clotted cream has been out of the fridge for WAY too long and has slightly split into creamy blodges and WATER.


    HOW WILL DINNER JINX RUIN MY LIVER AND ONIONS?

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