Spanking children as a punishment (poll included)
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Original post by ArtGoblin
Spanking is more about the parent's anger than any attempt to discipline the child. Whenever my dad used to hit me, it was because he was really angry which figures now I'm older and I know how short-tempered he is whereas my mum has never hit me (that I can remember). I thinking hitting children is wrong in all circumstances.
Original post by Bonged.
Well.. yeah. It's also possible to punish and not physically attack.
Sometimes the most effective methods are physical.
As an analogy, it's possible to punish and not revoke somebody's freedom of movement (imprisonment), but that doesn't always work.
I've never been spanked by my parents, but my mom did slap me across the face a few times. And I don't think she was wrong in doing so, because, like MOST kids, there was a period of time in which I was a right little brat, and wouldn't listen to ANY sort of explanation or reasoning.
I never got slapped immediately after I'd done something wrong - usually she'd try to explain to me why she was angry, and I'd just talk back and act like a b****, completely disregarding her opinions and logic. Same with my dad.
And in those cases, I might get a slap - and the point is, there's hitting and hitting. The way in which my parents "hit" me was never very physically painful or traumatic - mostly it just hurt my ego. And my ego needed a bit of hurting, because it was freaking massive.
Obviously actual physical violence is terrible and should never be used on children, but our parents are people too, and you should try to remember that they're human, and can be driven over the edge, and it's not always their fault. And also, a little slap or spank from time to time isn't the end of the world. Tbh, sometimes there's nothing else they can do, because children can be horrible.
I never got slapped immediately after I'd done something wrong - usually she'd try to explain to me why she was angry, and I'd just talk back and act like a b****, completely disregarding her opinions and logic. Same with my dad.
And in those cases, I might get a slap - and the point is, there's hitting and hitting. The way in which my parents "hit" me was never very physically painful or traumatic - mostly it just hurt my ego. And my ego needed a bit of hurting, because it was freaking massive.
Obviously actual physical violence is terrible and should never be used on children, but our parents are people too, and you should try to remember that they're human, and can be driven over the edge, and it's not always their fault. And also, a little slap or spank from time to time isn't the end of the world. Tbh, sometimes there's nothing else they can do, because children can be horrible.
Unfortunately, you've just perfectly summed up my father... I hope I just don't inherit it.
Hmm, that's just it though, have they turned out fine? I might be making a mountain out of a molehill, but think about if it makes them likely to hit their child when they grow up. If so, then there's probably some issue there.
For a second let's assume that hitting a child is perfectly acceptable, why do it anyway?
Original post by T-Toe
White people: 'No spanking is sooo wrong, that child should say F U to the parent and call childline'
Black people: 'Naa it's cool. I got beats and I turned out fine'
Black people: 'Naa it's cool. I got beats and I turned out fine'
Hmm, that's just it though, have they turned out fine? I might be making a mountain out of a molehill, but think about if it makes them likely to hit their child when they grow up. If so, then there's probably some issue there.
For a second let's assume that hitting a child is perfectly acceptable, why do it anyway?
(edited 12 years ago)
Original post by Tootles
It's not always out of anger, my parents would only ever smack me once, or maybe twice (depending on how bad I'd been), and they never left a mark, however angry they were.
My mother hit me a few times throughout my childhood and I would admit that I had misbehaved badly each time. However she freely admits that this was simply out of anger and frustration rather than any deep thinking as to whether it would make me behave better, I think most peoples parents would say the same.
I don't particularly feel hard done by - and I think that how most people that were smacked when they terribly misbehaved feel, however I think that there is a very fine line between giving you one thump on the arm when you break a window or something and giving a child a beating, which is only going to increase the likelihood of that child growing up resentful and violent themselves.
Original post by ROYP
But that's hilarious
Haha I know, I had the best time doing it. The best part was when the head teacher called my mum and my mums friend. She said on the phone "I need you to come in and see your son's and his friends lovely art work"
So my mum was like, "oooo, Sam has don't some artwork at school with a friend"
The headteacher led them into the toilet and my mum was like "wtf, this isn't the art room"
Teacher: "look up"
Mum + friends mum:
Original post by whyumadtho
Sometimes the most effective methods are physical.
As an analogy, it's possible to punish and not revoke somebody's freedom of movement (imprisonment), but that doesn't always work.
As an analogy, it's possible to punish and not revoke somebody's freedom of movement (imprisonment), but that doesn't always work.
That's a very worrying statement. Each individual has the right to not be physically violated.
(I can't tell if you're arguing for the sake of it or if you're serious)
Original post by 331sam331
haha i know, i had the best time doing it. The best part was when the head teacher called my mum and my mums friend. She said on the phone "i need you to come in and see your son's and his friends lovely art work"
so my mum was like, "oooo, sam has don't some artwork at school with a friend"
the headteacher led them into the toilet and my mum was like "wtf, this isn't the art room"
teacher: "look up"
mum + friends mum:
so my mum was like, "oooo, sam has don't some artwork at school with a friend"
the headteacher led them into the toilet and my mum was like "wtf, this isn't the art room"
teacher: "look up"
mum + friends mum:
hahahahaha!!!!!
of course parents should hit their kids its a great lesson to teach them discipline
that is what all the child abusers say
that is what all the child abusers say
you should try being asian
parents beat the helllll out of you even more than black people man!
parents beat the helllll out of you even more than black people man!
oh and just for the record i turned out more than okay
its all about respecting your parents (Y)
its all about respecting your parents (Y)
If a child is spanked too much it is not good but also if the child is told of what not to do and is told with a reason, the child will still most likely continue to do it. Children at an early age don't know boundaries and one has to establish them.
When I was four, my mom told me many times to stop horse playing in the supermarket with my brother, but I never listened to her no matter how many times she had to explain the reason that someone would eventually get hurt. Obviously either my brother or I did get hurt but that still didn't stop us from continuing to want to horse play in the supermarket until my mother one day decided that enough is enough and gave us each a spank. With this spank we realized our boundaries. We still did play around t the supermarket because we are obviously kids but when my mother would see that we are getting out of control she would tell us to stop and we would immediately know that we needed to stop. We still loved our mother regardless of this spank. In the end I would thank my mom for spanking me in certain times of my childhood life otherwise I would not know my morals and boundaries of what is right or wrong.
When I was four, my mom told me many times to stop horse playing in the supermarket with my brother, but I never listened to her no matter how many times she had to explain the reason that someone would eventually get hurt. Obviously either my brother or I did get hurt but that still didn't stop us from continuing to want to horse play in the supermarket until my mother one day decided that enough is enough and gave us each a spank. With this spank we realized our boundaries. We still did play around t the supermarket because we are obviously kids but when my mother would see that we are getting out of control she would tell us to stop and we would immediately know that we needed to stop. We still loved our mother regardless of this spank. In the end I would thank my mom for spanking me in certain times of my childhood life otherwise I would not know my morals and boundaries of what is right or wrong.
Original post by T-Toe
White people: 'No spanking is sooo wrong, that child should say F U to the parent and call childline'
Black people: 'Naa it's cool. I got beats and I turned out fine'
Black people: 'Naa it's cool. I got beats and I turned out fine'
haha
Sad but true.
Original post by Dr. Bassman
I'm against it but spanking a kid isn't the end of the world. Unless you're leaving marks or something. It's stupid and mean but I took a pasting when I was little and turned out (mostly) fine.
Well, what punishment would you advocate?
Original post by whyumadtho
I'm perfectly serious.
The rights to which you refer are the prerogative of the rational. Children are irrational and so have rights that are different to that of adults. I cannot call the police to ask my child to be arrested for criminal damage if it draws on my wall. The child cannot call the police claiming false imprisonment if I ground it for a few days.
Are the polcie violating your right not to be physically violated when they arrest you? By residing in the state/my custody, you cede universal rights in respect to whatever rules and regulations the state/I set.
The rights to which you refer are the prerogative of the rational. Children are irrational and so have rights that are different to that of adults. I cannot call the police to ask my child to be arrested for criminal damage if it draws on my wall. The child cannot call the police claiming false imprisonment if I ground it for a few days.
Are the polcie violating your right not to be physically violated when they arrest you? By residing in the state/my custody, you cede universal rights in respect to whatever rules and regulations the state/I set.
Cool.
What point are you actually making in regards to the topic of the thread?
Original post by Tootles
it was more about the humiliation than the pain. But it worked, I learned right from wrong.
This! 100%. The reason why I'd never play up in public was because my mother would give me 'the look', then I'd shut up instantly to avoid the embarrassment of being smacked.
I voted yes. I was as a child, and it worked fine for me.
All it ever did for me was fuel my hate for my parents and make me feel like the protagonist acting in defiance!
Original post by Bonged.
That's a very worrying statement. Each individual has the right to not be physically violated.
(I can't tell if you're arguing for the sake of it or if you're serious)
(I can't tell if you're arguing for the sake of it or if you're serious)
Rights are the prerogative of the rational. Those who are deemed irrational are subject to different rights than those who are deemed rational. I cannot call the police asking them to arrest and prosecute my child for criminal damage if they draw on the wall. My child cannot call the police asking them to arrest and prosecute me for false imprisonment if I ground them for a few days.
Are the police in the wrong for neglecting your right not to be physically violated when they arrest you? Whilst residing in the state/my custody, you implicitly cede your rights in favour of whatever rules and regulations the state/I set. Should we release all prisoners to protect their right to the freedom of movement?
(You're sounding awfully... liberal.
)(edited 12 years ago)
Original post by Bulbasaur
Hmm, that's just it though, have they turned out fine? I might be making a mountain out of a molehill, but think about if it makes them likely to hit their child when they grow up. If so, then there's probably some issue there.
For a second let's assume that hitting a child is perfectly acceptable, why do it anyway?
Hmm, that's just it though, have they turned out fine? I might be making a mountain out of a molehill, but think about if it makes them likely to hit their child when they grow up. If so, then there's probably some issue there.
For a second let's assume that hitting a child is perfectly acceptable, why do it anyway?
Me getting beats ensured I never did it again. I have no animosity towards my mum at all. That was her way of disciplining me which was very much a cultural thing. If she'd emotionally punished me, well, that might have just damaged my psyche. As I've adapted to the British culture I wouldn't beat my child. I'd smack them gently on their bums when they're very young so that they're able to put two and two together. However I'd hate to have to persuade my child to do something.
Side note - How often do you see African/Asian children on shows like 'Supernanny' or 'World's strictest parents'?
(edited 12 years ago)
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