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Replace Harry Potter quotes with bacon.

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    It's a trending topic on Twitter right now, but as it's safe to assume not everyone uses it, I decided to post on here as well, because I think it's a brilliant idea.
    My favorites so far would definitely have to be:
    "Do not pity the dead, Harry. Pity the living, and, above all, those who live without bacon."
    "Bacon will always be given at Hogwarts to those who ask for it."
    "There is no good and evil, there is only bacon, and those too weak to seek it."
    "Bacon beyond measure is man's greatest treasure."

    If you have any bright ideas, feel free to carry on
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    'I don't go looking for bacon. Bacon usually finds me.'

    "You know your mother, Malfoy? The expression on her face - like she's got bacon under her nose? Is she like that all the time or just because you were with her?"
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    "Not my bacon, you b***h"
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    "The bacon. It is a beautiful and terrible thing, and should therefore be treated with great caution."
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    "She's nutty as squirrel bacon"
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    pg 132 (philospher's)

    'there are some things you can't share without ending up liking each other, and knocking out a twelve foot mountain bacon is one of them.

    en français (folio junior pg 186)

    Il se crée des liens particuliers lorsqu'on fait ensemble certaines choses. Abattre un bacon de quatre mètres de haut par exemple.

    EDIT: oh negative rep!
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    "I don't go looking for bacon. Bacon usually finds me."
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    pg 174 (philosopher's)
    'We'll have to risk it. And we have got the Bacon, Malfoy doesn't know about that.'
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    You're a bacon, bacon.
    I'm a bacon?
    A bacon. And a bacon bacon bacon, I'd wager, once you've bacon bacon bacon bacon.
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    "Bacon can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light."
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    Professor Trelawney: Would anyone like me to help interpret the shadowy realms within their bacon?
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    "No bacon on Sundays."
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    'Bacon! Bacon! Bacon! Bacon!' - Albus Dumbledore.

    (Originally 'Nitwit! Blubber! Oddment! Tweak'. Both work equally well, I think.)
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    Not nearly as amusing as the one where you swap the word wand for the word wang.

    Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang.

    'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.

    The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.


    Sex is funnier than bacon. Fact.
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    "There will be no foolish bacon waving or silly incantations in this class."
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    This is basically the best thread I've ever stumbled across.
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    Bacon ! ( spell )
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    The titles also work quite well, eg: Harry Potter and the Chamber of Bacon, Harry Potter and the Bacon of Azkaban.
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    "Harry. you're a bacon"
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    (Original post by Saudade)
    Not nearly as amusing as the one where you swap the word wand for the word wang.

    Something silver-white, something enormous, erupted from the end of his wang.

    'Get - off - me!' Harry gasped. For a few seconds they struggled, Harry pulling at his uncles sausage-like fingers with his left hand, his right maintaining a firm grip on his raised wang.

    The troll couldn't feel Harry hanging there, but even a troll will notice if you stick a long bit of wood up its nose, and Harry's wang had still been in his hand when he'd jumped - it had gone straight up one of the troll's nostrils.


    Sex is funnier than bacon. Fact.
    Yeah but everyone's heard those ones a million times before.

    Funny as heck the first time round.

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Updated: April 10, 2012
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