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Can´t get out of this vicious circle

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    I´m caught in this horrible vicious circle and I can´t get out of it. I first started to get these thoughts 2 years ago. I´m on medication for depression but my thoughts are still very negative, which of course affects how I feel. I feel guilty for feeling like this and wish I could see tthe way out. Sometimes I just think why can´t I get over it?

    I´ve been feeling really tired lately, so went to the doctors, who gave me the medication and also did a blood test. Went back yesterday for the results and I´m very concerned. My glucose levels are too high, which means I´m at high risk of developing diabetes. I don´t know where to turn now. I don´t want to read too much information online because it frightens me. I also don´t feel I can talk to friends, (well, when I´m not shutting myself off) because they won´t want me to burden them with their problems.

    Has anyone been in a similar position?
    Can anyone give me any advice?
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    (Original post by sunfowers01)
    Has anyone been in a similar position?
    Can anyone give me any advice?
    I think I know what you might mean. Been on medication, therapies etc for years.

    Please could you describe some of your thoughts, emotions and what is happening as I'm not sure exactly what advice you are seeking.
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    (Original post by los lobos marinos)
    I think I know what you might mean. Been on medication, therapies etc for years.

    Please could you describe some of your thoughts, emotions and what is happening as I'm not sure exactly what advice you are seeking.
    Basically my thoughts are very negative and I struggle to block them out. I think I should be better in social situations, that people are judging me for being shy.I also think that I'm not good enough because I'm having these thoughts and feelings. A frequent thought is "what's the point?" I worry a lot about all these things and about work. Feel like I'm always at work, not physically but mentally. I'm tearful a lot of the time and sometimes hurt myself.

    Hope that makes some kind of sense.
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    (Original post by sunfowers01)
    Basically my thoughts are very negative and I struggle to block them out. I think I should be better in social situations, that people are judging me for being shy.I also think that I'm not good enough because I'm having these thoughts and feelings. A frequent thought is "what's the point?" I worry a lot about all these things and about work. Feel like I'm always at work, not physically but mentally. I'm tearful a lot of the time and sometimes hurt myself.

    Hope that makes some kind of sense.
    :console: I'm really sorry to hear about your sadness and tearfulness, and it's very worrying that you sometimes hurt yourself
    It's horrible to feel that way. It can be hard to function properly and perform everyday tasks when your your mood is so low, when everything can seem so pointless and when the cumulative effect is so tiring.

    However, there is some good news. :yes:
    Whilst all of what you describe are some of the classical symptoms of poor psychological health, there are a variety of effective treatments available that can alleviate the worst symptoms and in some cases may also resolve the complex underlying causes. :yep:

    One of the hardest things can be letting people know how you feel and what you are going through. Do you talk to your family or friends (really hard Iknow)? Have you let your GP know exactly what is happening with your thoughts, emotions and behaviour?

    You've said that you are currently being prescribed medication for your depression and it is important you inform your GP if it is not effective at reducing the worst symptoms after say the first 2-3 months of beginning the course of treatment. That way, alternatives can be considered.

    I was wondering as well whether you and GP had talked about other types of treatment that you could try, possibly in combination with the medication (talking therapies for example)? Could be worth thinking about

    In the meantime, don't feel shy or awkward about unloading here. No-one will judge. We'll just try and offer a bit of support and advice where possible. It can just be good knowing that you are not alone :console: and that someone will listen...
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    (Original post by los lobos marinos)
    :console: I'm really sorry to hear about your sadness and tearfulness, and it's very worrying that you sometimes hurt yourself
    It's horrible to feel that way. It can be hard to function properly and perform everyday tasks when your your mood is so low, when everything can seem so pointless and when the cumulative effect is so tiring.

    However, there is some good news. :yes:
    Whilst all of what you describe are some of the classical symptoms of poor psychological health, there are a variety of effective treatments available that can alleviate the worst symptoms and in some cases may also resolve the complex underlying causes. :yep:

    One of the hardest things can be letting people know how you feel and what you are going through. Do you talk to your family or friends (really hard Iknow)? Have you let your GP know exactly what is happening with your thoughts, emotions and behaviour?

    You've said that you are currently being prescribed medication for your depression and it is important you inform your GP if it is not effective at reducing the worst symptoms after say the first 2-3 months of beginning the course of treatment. That way, alternatives can be considered.

    I was wondering as well whether you and GP had talked about other types of treatment that you could try, possibly in combination with the medication (talking therapies for example)? Could be worth thinking about

    In the meantime, don't feel shy or awkward about unloading here. No-one will judge. We'll just try and offer a bit of support and advice where possible. It can just be good knowing that you are not alone :console: and that someone will listen...
    Thanks for your replies. I was seeing a counsellor for almost a year, which helped, but then I finished uni and couldn't get access to the service. I try to talk to friends who I think will understand, but I'm also concerned that I may trigger them because they have managed to block things out and I haven't managed to do this yet. I don't tend to talk to my family about how I'm feeling. Some of them know I'm taking citalopram. Haven't told my mum though because she doesn't agree with it. I've only been taking it for 2 and a half weeks.

    I've mentioned my feelings to my GP (but I'm abroad so it's not my usual GP) who precribed the medication and sent me from blood tests. I have a very high chance of getting diabetes so he said I need to sort my eating out and eat more regularly.

    This whole thing worries me. I'm not the type of person who can hide their feelings but I don't want to hurt or upset anyone else.
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    Anti-depressants can only do so much, you have to be disciplined with yourself to help yourself. I suffer with depression and I think to a certain extent you can think and feel what you like but you can't let it beat you. Takes things slowly- get yourself into a good routine and stick with it. I am not saying it will be easy but you can expect yourself to function properly unless your eating and sleeping regularly. Dont expect that your entire behaviour will change in a day just because you say it will- it wont!! Maybe trying going jogging, thats what i do when im finding things hard to deal with and i find its brilliant because your just thinking about your body and nothing else. Also it helps me know that i can carry on when i feel pain and endorphins are soooo good :P.

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Updated: March 25, 2012
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