Hi

some help please...

so I'm super stressed out and I basically have no clue how to handle it. My teachers have even said to me that I don't know the meaning of relaxing. It sounds really stupid, but if someone could tell me EXACTLY what it is then that would be great. Is it being almost asleep like when you have a massage or something? or is it just going out with your friends?
Because whatever it is, something has gone wrong somewhere...

I'm 'normally' a bubbly, happy, laughing person and I've now been reduced to this crying, stressed out wreck almost all the time. I have friends and yeh, I go out with them a bit but whenever I do, I feel guilty. I feel like 'I should be doing school work. What if I don't get into uni now? What if I turn into some partying failure?' It's even got so bad that when I get stressed, all I do is scream and cry like a 3 year old, which isn't good and it's pretty much because whenever I got stressed before, I would hurt myself and then people started noticing and I regretted it the next day so instead, I would pull on my hair. And know that's bad too, so now I just scream and scream and scream until I loose my voice. It's got worse though and really bad thoiughts are entering my head.

I've been like this before and I was on the wrong contraceptive pill and I'm still on A pill, but a different one now ? sometimes I'm even worse off of it than this which makes me really frightened.

Sorry for the long post, but has anyone got any advice as to how I can calm myself down and make myself happy again, just like I used to be?

(I'm gunna book a GP appt. tomorrow and I also go to a therapy group - it was my first week last week)