[catoswyn]

(Original post by Amandeep_Psych07)
I heard somewhere that suicide rates are the highest in asian women. I wish community leaders and religious leaders would do more about mental health issues. Even the government to some extent have a responsibility to educate BME communities about mental health issues.

Its really true what you say because it seems from the thread that part of the problem is that the whole concept of modern psychiatry/psychology has come from the Western tradition. Many communities are wary of such a Western origin or it just doesn't fit with their own models. So the answer would seem to be to talk to leaders in the community to try to find a common ground and a means of ensuring people can access mental health services with more confidence. I think this can only come from the community leaders like you say. Its a tough one though as the models are so different. There is apparently a problem too with African/Caribbean males as well who tend to present really late with things like Schitzophrenia. Again there was a different model of the illness and also a distrust of authority.

People must be aware of all this though surely? There are so many Asian doctors for instance and some must work in mental health services and may be able to talk to community leaders and the like.

[swaggiee]

why dont you talk to her parents about it? They must care

[>Username<]

I've not posted on this thread for a while because things have been fine with my friend.

However today she just had, I don't know what it's called, so I'll call it a "breakdown". She just went out of class and was crying... She told me she was hearing the voices again... Later on she went home. We've then spoke since and she said she asked her Mum for the tablets, and her Mum said no.

I'm honestly really worried and I don't know what to do.

I've suggested some of the stuff people said on here, but that doesn't seem to be working...

[farahrara]

i feel as though i have been in a similar situation as ur friend...i decided to stick it out though
i am now 18 hitting 19 in june and things havent changed much to be honest
just make sure ur there for her to talk to even after school ends and make her aware that u will always be there for her
coz i didnt have that sort of support
and it would have been nice if i did...

[paniking_and_not_revising]

(Original post by >Username<)
I've not posted on this thread for a while because things have been fine with my friend.

However today she just had, I don't know what it's called, so I'll call it a "breakdown". She just went out of class and was crying... She told me she was hearing the voices again... Later on she went home. We've then spoke since and she said she asked her Mum for the tablets, and her Mum said no.

I'm honestly really worried and I don't know what to do.

I've suggested some of the stuff people said on here, but that doesn't seem to be working...

I think that could be classed as abuse. You need to report this to someone in school or social services or something.

[Dukeofwembley]

Im an asian but my parents are liberal
My bro tried to kill himself when he was 15, i luckily saved his life
You dont know how common it is, my parents talk about people killing themselves who are asian but they didint think it would happen to them;

I suggest you tell her that she definatley has something wrong with herself and that she needs to see mental health immediatley
If her parents dont listen ask them how'd they feel if their daughter commited suicide.
Then tell them that it is natural and that there is mental health issues everywhere, every country on earth.
And please please you must intervene otherwise unlike me you may be too late and you will regret that decision for the rest of your life.

[acecoffee]

when i was first diagnosis , my parent also have a big issue with whats going on .
and was clearly not please with the decission of medication as well as hiding some medication or specially asked me to stop taking them .
'Snap out of it ' they said .

however , what you describling is a more servere case then mine .

when a case like what you just describle , i dont think parent autority should be followed ,
speak to your teacher regarding this ,
ask your friend to join with you , if she doesnt, tell her you are going to tell the teacher anyway .

since she is still under education (not advance) even if she is over 18 , the teacher will need to help her to find the right way to deal with the issue and normally dont have to inform parent unless they believe she is at risk or with her consent .. this could range from chatting with her or parent (if she is okay with it ) about it to make sure she get the right treatment she need .

your friend might be angry at you or upset , but sooner or later she will understand you are doing it all for her good ,thinking you shouldnt do what she will be upset about is actually doing more harm then good .

if she actually have a servere psychotic attack and take further action and show risk to herself or other . regardless where she is at , (in classroom or etc) social service and nhs have to get involved and things are going to get even more complicated then you can expect .legal action can be taken again again the guardianship of her parent as well as the proper health treatment . this inculded volunterily enter into hospital or even section . into CAMHs , therapy section,more medication . when she is in those situation , hospital have the end decision to decided whether they allow the parent visit ,visiting time or even banned her parent to visit her if they believe parent visit could cause her great distress .

things are not going to be as simple as it is now .so my suggestion is discuss with her parent if it is possible , if not , maybe you will required further help from school when they could arrange further stuff for you . and if warn her parent that their action could have serious consequency .i think if the child really done something in risk of herself or other , what the parent were doing (ban her from going out to seek health support and putting her at risk by hiding her medication) could already be legally classify as child abuse .by ''exploitation of a child, or which places the child in an imminent risk of serious harm'' and guardianship of the child could be removed from parent until further notice if they ignore the warning and such .

Once again , please speak to your teacher or advisor regarding this even if your friend disagree ,it might have cause damage into the friendship of the two of you , but it could have save her life and make sure she got a better chance of recovery ,or you might regret the decision for the rest of your life if you have done nothing and it is all too late .

[idealized]

To be honest, you said she clearly has mental problems so her telling you that she doesnt want the teachers involved isnt the best thing for her.
Just tell a teacher! You want her to get well dont you? Be brave.

[>Username<]

Update:

Everything I said so far was true. But now I know some more information.

When my friend went to the Doctors before the Doctor gave her some tablets for depression, these are the tablets her Mum won't let her take. Because her Mum takes them tablets and says it's very easy to get addicted.

In terms of the voices, she said the Doctor said this is common among young people and whilst there are tablets they are too strong. And he doesn't want to start on her them because she's too young. (He even showed her some of the tablets and how high the dosages are). He asked if she wanted to speak to someone, like a therapist, but she didn't want to. So then he told her some exercises to do, like keeping calm and that kind of stuff.

I don't think she's lying. I think she's a very private person and almost feel like she's being exposed which is why she didn't tell me the full story. What she told me is all true, but it wasn't exactly the full truth.

I'm no expert, but does this sound right? The Doctor is basically telling her to control it at the moment simply because it's very very minor. Her Mum is keeping her tablets but they are anti-depressants and her Mum also takes them so she doesn't want her daughter to get addicted like she did.

Thanks for all the help. I really appreciate it. And if anyone knows if this sounds vaguely right, please let me know.

Thanks.

[Secreay]

I think something really bad happened to your friend

[>Username<]

(Original post by Secreay)
I think something really bad happened to your friend

How do you mean...?

[S_123]

School councillor? Then she is still in school but getting help.

[Secreay]

Ive seen this case before shes being tormented by some event or by some constant factor, try get her to talk about something that might be bothering her and what's making her feel that way because it is something it is never ever nothing, also what ever you do NOT take her to NHS paediatric counselling they make it worse. Try the schools counselling or a paid one.

[Bey Taco]

Why dont you skip a class or two and visit the GP, that way she will be able to get the tablets and take them without her parents knowing.

If she is frightened that her relative might see her, maybe call the GP, speak to the person who has prescribed her the antidepressants and tell him to refer her to a different GP nearby so she can collect her medication from there.

It shouldnt be too much trouble.

I know you will be skipping classes but it would be for your friends benefit. Or you can try to purchaise some sort of antidepressants or antistress tablets from over counter, I am not sure if you can find one strong enough or if they sell them at all. It should be eassier for someone older to buy the tablets as the two of you might seem suspecious if you look too young.

[adeena123]

What the heck?! Sorry bad way to start this post >.< BTW im a muslim..

First of all, i do not understand why her mother is not letting her take the tablets. Surely her mum would want her daughter to get better?! I do understand how muslim parents can act in these problems .. :/

Also, do you think she has any deceased relatives that might be causing these "voices"? My mum past away 2 years ago, and when i miss her i sometimes hear her voice..

She should really see someone.like a thrapist or something if her parents are not helping. does her problem affect her sleeping pattern, too? I dont really know any muslims that have been in this situation before..?

Hope i helped :/ xxxxx

[Aspiringlawstudent]

Racist.

[marquisinspades]

How about you collect the tablets for her? I imagine that it would be okay if you had her signed permission. As she's still in full time education, her prescription would be free, and then she could keep the tablets at school, and take them during the school day (in this way, it should still be possible for her to take the tablets at the same time everyday if need be.) For the weekends, I'm sure that she can conceal sufficient tablets for that short time, however overbearing her parents may be. Hope this helps!

[Anonymous]

Alright, I've read through this thread. Me being both a muslim and asian, and as someone said, the minorty that is a 'little educated', maybe I can shed some light on what's affecting your friend.

There are two posibilities here. The first is to do with her body, or more specifically her brain, or as you put it - mental health. The second is a bit more compliacated, and is the one I probably thing is more likely the case in such a situation.

Firstly, are you muslim? If you're not this is going to be very difficult to explain as only a muslim (no discrimination here) can understand the second poissiblity. anyway I'll try my best.

The first possiblity is most obviously depression, and a severe case of it. As you have said, she is not that religous, and her parents are very much locked down on her social life. This is the case with many asian families, ass parents want their children to be protected from the western 'secularised' new world. They want to keep their daughter under the traditions they grew up with, and the morals that they believe in, instead of being socialised into western culture. This is understandable from their perspective, but obviously not her's. Now this conflict of interest can lead to a huge pressure on many young muslims, especially if they are not conforming with their religion as much as their parents want. This can lead to a dual identity developing where she may be switching from 'muslim good girl' at home, to however else she wants to be at school. This can really affect the brain, trust me when I'm talking from experience as an 18 year old muslim, asian guy living in the UK. It can really depress you when you are desperate to have a decent social life, but your parents give you no room to breath. It can have you pulling at the hairs like mad because your parents don't understand what your interests are (because you don't tell them of course) and you don't understand their interests because you probably don't study Islam, practice Islam or follow its morals as much as you should. You might see that most solutions given in this thread by others for this possibility will not help her case much.

Now, this leads to a severe case of depression, anxiety, and yes can really put you down, to the extent of suicide. It has happened before. Now this is one of the possibilites of what is going on here with your friend. I don't understand why she's been given tablets, maybe something medical for stress and depression. But it will only breifly help her, not for the long term. She needs to sort out the situation with her parents, with social services, the police. Something like that so that conflict is resolved and her head can be at a degree of peace. Get what I'm saying?

NOW. The second possiblity. Jheeze, this is really difficult for me right now. Everyone in this thread doesn't really know much about this issue, as you need to muslim and practicing and educated in the religion to know what it's all about. You have given me so many indicators in your information about it that I really think that this is what's happened to your friend. If it has, I'm really very sorry for her as it's a difficult thing to get rid of. Especially as she is not practicing and that conflict between her parents and her social life remains. Jheeze where do I start.

Okay, first of all, if you are reading this and not muslim, you will think I'm mad. If you are muslim, then I assure you this is 100% true, I have seen it with my own eyes on many many occasions and it's not pleasent for the person experiencing it and it can be avoided very easily. In Islam, it is believed that there is a world of the unseen. That human beings are not the only inhabitants on this planet. This is the world of the jinn. We can't see them, but they can see us. They are not necessarily 'ghosts' but more of a different creation, made out of fire. They can travel long distances with ease and can influence us in many different ways. The most common way is whispering into our heart (through our desires) to do things which are not allowed in Islam. Now among many other religions also, they are commonly referred to as the devil. But this is a generalisation, as not all of them are bad, as some are muslim, christian, jewish, athiest, just like us. They are just like the human race with their own world. They dwell in derelict, dirty places. Your home's toilet is a common place for them. But as long as we don't disturb them, and we use the protection that is given to us in the Qur'an and Sunnah, we can protect ourselves from them harming us.

What do I mean by them harming us? If you are not a practicing person,, or someone that neglects your religion (please remember this is strictly applied to muslims), then you are vulnerable to what is known as possession. Now please, you might think I'm mad, this is a student forum, not a muslim one I understand that. I'm not saying I believe in any of these things or that I don't . I'm just here to give you advice to help you're friend. Remember that this is only a possibility. The fact that her parents say there is a devil inside of her, they have brought various 'religious people' to the house with no avail. tells me that this is what her parent's believe has happened. She has possibly been possessed by a jinn, could be a devil or not. This can do a lot of different things to her, and a common one is the voices in the head. The jinn maybe telling her to let go of life, commit suicide, in which in Islam she will believed to be going straight to hell, which is what the jinn wants. Obviously not what you want, or what she wants or what her parent wants. There we have consensus, eh?

Now the only way she can get rid of this, by the teachings of Islam is to go through a process of exorcism. I get the idea from your posts, that she has not been aware of such a case. Her parents are obviously not telling her all the details. She needs to ask them what is actually going on here. And how she needs to stop it. She can only stop it by, theoritically 'becoming more religious'. She needs to pray regularly, start following her teachings and parents and forget about her social life for now. (Lol, I really sound conservative). I'm not suggesting anything, this is not opinion, I'm just relaying the what's written. This way she will then see that the voices will become weaker and she will feel better. The jinn will fight back. A good muslim excorcist should help her through the process. It's so much more complicated. Damn, I do feel really sorry for her because of her social situation and her parents etc. There is a lot of conflict, mentally.

Those are the two possibilities. In my opinion, as a muslim, that her problem is a mixture of the two. 'Forcing religion' into her is only 'forcing' when she doesn't want it. I'm not taking the side of her parents, but maybe instill the idea into her that she should be a bit more open to what her parents are saying. I have experienced so much of what she is going through, it's hard to tell you how much I can help if I was there. I hope you understand what I'm telling you here, no matter how absurd it may sound. This is not rare, it's common among muslim communities with young people that are more inclined to what they want to do with their life and ahh, I could go on.

I hope I've helped. If you have any questions I'll inbox you so you can ask them, as I'm not gonna be on this thread all the time, gotta revise of course !!!