[Sternumator]

I consider a friend someone who I like and who I socialise with. If I went by the dictionary defintion, I haven't go any true friends. Like most guys, I don't want to have an emotional connection with friends

[miss_p]

(Original post by VanillaTwilight)
Very hard to come by these days!

Doesn't it seem that everyone's just out for themselves, and don't give to ****s about anyone else?!

Yes, it does.

[Left Eye]

He's called Jack Daniels. Best with ice, but sometimes he does like to get mixed up with coke.

[edd360]

Someone who I may have met once or twice and exchanged names with.

[kathhh8]

Someone who you can just get along with without it being strained, you can relax and be yourself around them. They can also have similar interests & sense of humour as you.

[P.h.o.e.n.i.x.y]

Someone who is always there for you when you need help; someone who cares about your life, your career, your studies; someone who trusts you.... basically lots..

but for me, a true friend is someone who will always be there for me, and me being there for them. It's a mutual relationship of care and trust.

[supraman]

(Original post by Iqbal007)
So looking through some of the threads in the section, some people have issues, etc.

I thinking about this, one dictionary definition of what a friend is a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.

But people have different views on what makes a friend or who you can call a friend. You have the different expectations who reaches a standard to be considered who is your friend.

So what makes a person a friend to you?
What are your expectations?

I'm actually trying to figure what makes a friend....since starting uni, people seem to toss u aside..............i got loads of people on facebook, quite a lot on my phone........but i honestly feel that none are worthy to be considered friends at all :'(

[supraman]

(Original post by Sternumator)
I consider a friend someone who I like and who I socialise with. If I went by the dictionary defintion, I haven't go any true friends. Like most guys, I don't want to have an emotional connection with friends

how do u not have any emotional connection?

[BefuddledPenguin]

Someone who can tolerate my company.
I have 2 friends.

[Iqbal007]

(Original post by supraman)
I'm actually trying to figure what makes a friend....since starting uni, people seem to toss u aside..............i got loads of people on facebook, quite a lot on my phone........but i honestly feel that none are worthy to be considered friends at all :'(

:/

[Chicken Hulk]

A friend is someone i can :

1.Trust
2.Have a laugh with
3.Be myself around
4.Have long silences in conversations and not feel awkward.
5.Cuss and know they wont end up crying.

[Sternumator]

(Original post by supraman)
how do u not have any emotional connection?

I don't want an emotion connection so don't engage in any bond forming activities. Emotional support is not what I want a friend for, most lads dont. There are lads who I have hung out with most days for most of my life and I wouldnt mind one bit if they went away and I never saw them again. I would just find other people to hang around with. If they went away and came back again I would treat them exactly the same. I probably sound like Im a really cold person who finds it difficult to get along with people and form normal relationships but i am really not. I don't think most lads really care about their friends although we help each other out when we can. If something terrible happened to me none of my friends would be that bothered but why would they be it doesnt effect them?

[string3r]

Disposable.

[joker12345]

A friend = someone you have in-jokes with and things to talk/laugh about.
A true friend/best friend = someone who'll be there for you whenever you need them etc (what everyone else has been saying).

[supraman]

(Original post by Sternumator)
I don't want an emotion connection so don't engage in any bond forming activities. Emotional support is not what I want a friend for, most lads dont. There are lads who I have hung out with most days for most of my life and I wouldnt mind one bit if they went away and I never saw them again. I would just find other people to hang around with. If they went away and came back again I would treat them exactly the same. I probably sound like Im a really cold person who finds it difficult to get along with people and form normal relationships but i am really not. I don't think most lads really care about their friends although we help each other out when we can. If something terrible happened to me none of my friends would be that bothered but why would they be it doesnt effect them?

That sounds like they aren't really friends, cos I'm very kind of like touchy like, for example like I don't call anyone my friend in all honesty unless I've known them and I get rid of them if they lose my trust :/ sounds a bit harsh, i'm quite sensetive for some strange reason :/

[Sternumator]

[QUOTE=supraman;37625284]That sounds like they aren't really friends, cos I'm very kind of like touchy like, for example like I don't call anyone my friend in all honesty unless I've known them and I get rid of them if they lose my trust :/ sounds a bit harsh, i'm quite sensetive for some strange reason :/[QUOTE]

Using the strictest definition they aren't friends but I think we are allowed a bit of flexibility with the definition as indicated in the title. Friend isnt a word I really use because if means you have to classify the people you hang around with into the strength of your emotional connection with I don't think I have with any of them. I prefer to not bother thinking about that just call everyone your mate and go out and have a good time. What do you mean by trust them exactly? When do you come across situtations where your mates would have the oportunity or desire to screw you over?

Its the reason boys don't fall out with there friends like girls do because they have much simplier relationships with their friends. Lads can just treat all there mates the same and don't really have to worry about what is expected of them in their role as a friend. For example, girls might get annoyed if their friend forgot about their birthday but already knowing and being comfortable with my 'friends' not caring that it is my birthday its never going to be an issue. Similarly, girls could be faced with the decision of whether go and see one friend as previously agreed or cancel that and go and support a friend who's cat had died. It could get very complicated with her potentially falling out with the one she didnt go and see and then the one she did see could get involved and it could keep going on and on. But if you don't have the emotional relationship then the idea of support doesnt really exist and you would carry on as originally planned and your friend whos cat had died wouldnt see why it would matter if you were there or not.

I think a lot of girls friendships are based on an expectation of emotional support and then if it doesn't come arguements can happen. When girls fall out it is often not actually about anything more than the expectations not being reached. But boys dont have any expectations of an emotional nature so as I said before it leaves very little possibility for lads to feel betrayed or to fall out. The only time I fall out with someone is if they are being a prick so I don't make up with them I just permanently think they are a prick. Unlike with girls, the situtations where this arises are never going to be complex sequences of events, you dont get 'well it was out of order for jane to tell helen before coming to you first.' A lot of the time it will be one guy mugging another guy off to try and make himself look a big man. Other than that its only girls and and sometimes money that cause disputes.

That is why you should avoid emotional ties with friends because they only cause trouble.

[Vian]

As other have said, someone you'd rely on and who would rely on you.

As long as they're not immediate family.

[Stilo]

Someone with whom I can share the last slice of pizza <3 .

Edit: No homo.

[almalibre11111]

(Original post by Iqbal007)
So looking through some of the threads in the section, some people have issues, etc.

I thinking about this, one dictionary definition of what a friend is a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.

But people have different views on what makes a friend or who you can call a friend. You have the different expectations who reaches a standard to be considered who is your friend.

So what makes a person a friend to you?
What are your expectations?

someone where i can say whatever i want and seriously put no thought at anything you wanna say....{and so far the number is single 1 of that kind of human beings} {its normal i mainly dislike people because im very straight in what i want, when i see talks behind back when i see fake attitude when i see stupid people im gone}

[llacerta]

[QUOTE=Sternumator;37627317]

(Original post by supraman)

That is why you should avoid emotional ties with friends because they only cause trouble.

I hate to reinforce gender stereotypes, but from my experiences, what you've said is true.

However, from a girl's point of view, though we may more often run the risk of 'drama', of difficult friendships and arguments, this cost comes with the added advantage of having friends that can get you through tough times and who, sometimes, can be as valuable as family.

Maybe it's because I come from a particularly small family myself, (and also because I admit to being a soppy person generally) but I love the emotional ties I have with my friends. The drama that sometimes (and quite rarely, to be honest) occurs is totally worth it for those times when I've realised how lucky I am to have such close friends who I can talk to about anything, and who can come to me with anything. I genuinely can't imagine my life without these people.

In short, with those sorts of friendships you've got to take the lows with the highs, whereas guys tend to remain at a pretty constant level in their friendships. I guess it's personal choice as to which one someone goes for, but I know which I prefer.