Government to monitor your emails, texts and web use

Are you an idiot? This allows the government, without the consent of a magistrate, to look at hugely personal information such as personal emails - and is currently only in place in deeply unpleasant regimes like in Iran and China. DO WE get to read all the emails Cameron and Clegg send? will we get to personally monitor the communications of MI5 and 6? What next, can you not see the gradual erosion of civil liberties in the United Kingdom (and across the Western World?), I can, and it is deeply disturbing. This monitoring is exactly what the free West used to criticise communist countries for - GCHQ will now be our version of the Stasi. Even now "thoughtcrime" is punished more enthusiastically than a lot of real crime. The Tories, Labour and Lib Dems have all supported this in the last few years. What does this say about democracy in Britain?

It wouldn't affect anyone who wasn't suspected of committing a crime though.

And you actually think it's going to happen in this country?

And you actually think it's going to happen in this country?

Given what they've managed to get away with over the past decade or so, I wouldn't be surprised.

This is a normal day at 10 Downing Street:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7edeOEuXdMU

The government wants to be able to read through all your texts, emails and look at what websites you have been accessing. Despite opposing it during the last government, both the Conservatives and Lib Dems are now in favour of forcing ISPs and mobile phone companies to hand over your private data to them. They'll need to obtain a warrant to look at the content of your emails and texts, although the new legislation would give the government the ability to see who you've been talking to and for how long without even having to go to court.

Of course, this is all for our own protection

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-politics-17576745

Are you a terrorist or a criminal? If not they wouldn't give a crap about your internet activity.

I'm neither, so why should I be monitored?

I think its hilarious how everyone's outraged and annoyed that this is going to happen. As if they would push this through, could you imagine how bad that would be for them in the long term? Nobody would vote for them.

You're all so gullible, as if they give a crap what a bunch of students are looking at anyway.

I am going to open a new account with a generic ISP, to start off with I will visit all the watchlist sites I can find in the hope I get picked up on their radar. After a week of doing this I will stop and set up a dedicated PC to ping Dave Benson Phillip's personal web page once per day at 12:00, a heartbeat, a reminder I am still there.

Some intelligence sap at GCHQ will be watching, wondering why Dave? why at 12:00? Slowly building a relationship with me across the void of the internet. He will check it every day I will become his rock his stone that regular ping he can turn to and tell all his worldy issues, he will come to love that regular blip on the radar more than his wife. More than his children.

And then.

One day.

I will unplug the computer, he will log on at 11:59 prepared to see my next regular visit to the personal site of Dave Benson Phillips. When it fails to happen at 12:00 he will start to sweat, who will listen to his opinions on last nights football? Who will he make jokes to about their god awful manager? Who will he love? It is that moment of loss he will then grow concerned. Is it today? Will he go after Dave today? Before long Dave Benson Phillips will be ushered into government protection, no longer able to provide affordable entertainment as that much loved ex childrens presenter from the 90s. Student gigs up and down the country will be empty and slowly without that loveable smile from Dave society will descend into Anarchy.

During this chaos I will elude the authorities, on the run I will change my name, my hair colour, I will burn my fingerprints off like Will Smith in MiB. It will be well cool.

The intelligence officer will turn to booze at first, in the hope that harsh regular tang of whiskey hitting the back of his throat can replace the piercing ping that visited him at 12:00 everyday. It won't work, who is he kidding? Why did he get involved in this industry in the first place? Perving into the lives of his family friends and countrymen in the vein hope of stopping some never to happen terrorist attack. He wanted to be an astronaut as a kid, where did it all go wrong?

He feels the coldness of the barrel pressing against his temple, he hears the screams of people outside as the 5th day of riots continues on. "Where are you Dave?" they call from below, the echo of his legacy. As he slowly squeezes the trigger his life flashes before his eyes, but at that moment the door is kicked down. A masked figure stands at the door his arm outstretched, a bridge, a way out.

"Follow me, rise up, seize this land for us the people!" I heartily shout.

"It is I! The mysterious pinger on O2's £10 a month broadband" I continue.

His love for me is pure, I am his everything, he follows me outside as we rally the public to our cause. It is not long before the government panics and reveals to us Dave Benson Phillips' location, together we storm to the Lake District and in jubilant celebration raise Dave Benson Phillips onto our shoulders proclaiming him the leader of the people for all eternity! God Save Get Your Own Back!

TL;DR This bill is a load of ****ing *******s.

I'm neither, so why should I be monitored?

You won't be! The monitoring is only for suspects in criminal investigations. Not mundane paranoiacs like you!

The only people affected by this would be those that are seen as threats.

When I read about this earlier, my immediate reaction was: what?! How can they do this?! And then: "well, that's bound to get to the ECtHR."

And then I realised they had to have a warrant and I thought, "well, fair's fair really. I have no reason to worry unless I go doing something stupid so I'm going to refrain from complaining this time. "

Are you an idiot? This allows the government, without the consent of a magistrate, to look at hugely personal information such as personal emails - and is currently only in place in deeply unpleasant regimes like in Iran and China. DO WE get to read all the emails Cameron and Clegg send? will we get to personally monitor the communications of MI5 and 6? What next, can you not see the gradual erosion of civil liberties in the United Kingdom (and across the Western World?), I can, and it is deeply disturbing. This monitoring is exactly what the free West used to criticise communist countries for - GCHQ will now be our version of the Stasi. Even now "thoughtcrime" is punished more enthusiastically than a lot of real crime. The Tories, Labour and Lib Dems have all supported this in the last few years. What does this say about democracy in Britain?

Firstly, the corporations that provide those online services to you can already look at your e-mails, messages, and all that other silly stuff you do online - this bill would not make "private" information any less available, it would only mean that the gov't could see it as well.

Besides, only those suspected of doing wrong would be targeted for this kind of thing.

Also, it's a myth that only China and Russia do this kind of thing - the US is very keen on it.