Single. Heartbroken. Guy friend I've been in love with for 9.5 years (we were fwbs for just over a year) is dating one of my best friends. No she didn't / doesn't know how I feel about him.
Trying to move on, and taking it one day at a time...
(Original post by Foo.mp3) My internet persona is markedly different from my manner IRL.. it's a wonder girls take a shine to me at all on here! Mind you, it's a handy 'trial by fire' (assuming they pay much attention to my posts)
Might be a let-down for those who like your online persona, though.
(Original post by InnerTemple)
Therein lies an interesting (though completely off topic) chat to be had: is getting with someone else in order to get over one's ex the right thing to do?
It's something I've thought about more than once. I think it's the wrong thing to do.
I want to find someone else to get over him, to make me happy like he did, and to make him jealous. But in reality, in order for me to be happy and to get over him I think I need to spend time with friends and make new ones (as I don't have many) to take my mind off him and allow me to have fun again. Also I wouldn't want to hurt someone else - I wouldn't want to be with someone else while I still love my ex because that's not nice for the other person. And in all honesty I don't think I will find someone I like as much as I liked my ex for a very long time.
So.. getting with someone else to get over your ex is not the right thing to do.
Last edited by StartSomething; 02-04-2012 at 20:51.
Sometimes I think that if you have qualities, characteristics, sensibilities, flaws, brainwaves and desires that happen to genuinely match very well. If you understand each other with so much ease that you can't properly remember what it felt like not to have them as a constant friend. If you developed closeness over time on top of a deep strong sense that something was 'right' about the union, not from butterflies and blinding physical sensations first... Then, you both just know.
It doesn't matter that everyone else would think you're stupid/wrong, that the majority of relationships don't last so statistically speaking yours probably won't. I think some people are just more intuitive, know the parameters: what could happen, how much they are willing to work and for which reasons, to which ends. A -realistic- genuine understanding of themselves and the other person. Realistic being the most important part.
I have been with my current boyfriend for 16 months. We grow closer and stronger every day. We get further in everything we want to do with our lives personally, every sphere is improved. I have never been happier. I'm even much more physically healthy than I've ever been before.
We have had arguments about various things, it's a healthy part of any kind of relationship. Learning about each other, being closely involved with someone, is an active process that continuously involves miscommunications and flares of upset - but they're always so quickly and fully resolved. It's such a pleasure overall.
We will probably get married fairly soon, in a registery office with no trimmings - just need to be able to afford rings and outfits, basically (so 'soon' can be taken quite loosely, could be years yet while we concentrate on other things/university). Starting the beginning of a life together with a full commitment, before we start building everything. It is just our style. It's not right for everyone, but we believe it is the right lifestyle choice for us. We could be wrong.
We're both 20.