[ConfusedAfrican]

so this guy loved sending prophets to talk **** and perform miracles back in the days where people thought the world was flat, why did he stop all of this now that we have cameras and ****?

[Nephilim]

He hasn't stopped sending messengers. The Bible says that the only way for people to hear the gospel is if it is preached. There have been many preachers since the days of Christ, and there still are.

[ConfusedAfrican]

(Original post by Nephilim)
He hasn't stopped sending messengers. The Bible says that the only way for people to hear the gospel is if it is preached. There have been many preachers since the days of Christ, and there still are.

damn. so the number of abrahams, noahs elijahs etc. is actually increasing?

[_music<3]

I'm pretty sure Jesus was supposed to be the last prophet if that helps.

[hippieglitter]

He didn't, but most of the people who God talks to nowadays end up in maximum security psychiatric hospitals.

[sconter]

Nation Shudders At Large Block Of Uninterrupted Text



WASHINGTON—Unable to rest their eyes on a colorful photograph or boldface heading that could be easily skimmed and forgotten about, Americans collectively recoiled Monday when confronted with a solid block of uninterrupted text.

Dumbfounded citizens from Maine to California gazed helplessly at the frightening chunk of print, unsure of what to do next. Without an illustration, chart, or embedded YouTube video to ease them in, millions were frozen in place, terrified by the sight of one long, unbroken string of English words.

"Why won't it just tell me what it's about?" said Boston resident Charlyne Thomson, who was bombarded with the overwhelming mass of black text late Monday afternoon. "There are no bullet points, no highlighted parts. I've looked everywhere—there's nothing here but words."

"Ow," Thomson added after reading the first and last lines in an attempt to get the gist of whatever the article, review, or possibly recipe was about.

At 3:16 p.m., a deafening sigh was heard across the country as the nation grappled with the daunting cascade of syllables, whose unfamiliar letter-upon-letter structure stretched on for an endless 500 words. Children wailed for the attention of their bewildered parents, businesses were shuttered, and local governments ground to a halt as Americans scanned the text in vain for a web link to click on.

Sources also reported a 450 percent rise in temple rubbing and under-the-breath cursing around this time.

"It demands so much of my time and concentration," said Chicago resident Dale Huza, who was confronted by the confusing mound of words early Monday afternoon. "This large block of text, it expects me to figure everything out on my own, and I hate it."

"I've never seen anything like it," said Mark Shelton, a high school teacher from St. Paul, MN who stared blankly at the page in front of him for several minutes before finally holding it up to his ear. "What does it want from us?"

As the public grows more desperate, scholars are working to randomly italicize different sections of the text, hoping the italics will land on the important parts and allow everyone to go on with their day. For now, though, millions of panicked and exhausted Americans continue to repetitively search the single column of print from top to bottom and right to left, looking for even the slightest semblance of meaning or perhaps a blurb.

Some have speculated that the never-ending flood of sentences may be a news article, medical study, urgent product recall notice, letter, user agreement, or even a binding contract of some kind. But until the news does a segment in which they take sections of the text and read them aloud in a slow, calm voice while highlighting those same words on the screen, no one can say for sure.

There are some, however, who remain unfazed by the virtual hailstorm of alternating consonants and vowels, and are determined to ignore it.

"I'm sure if it's important enough, they'll let us know some other way," Detroit local Janet

Landsman said. "After all, it can't be that serious. If there were anything worthwhile buried deep in that block of impenetrable English, it would at least have an accompanying photo of a celebrity or a large humorous title containing a pop culture reference."

Added Landsman, "Whatever it is, I'm pretty sure it doesn't even have a point."

[Politricks]

(Original post by ConfusedAfrican)
so this guy loved sending prophets to talk **** and perform miracles back in the days where people thought the world was flat, why did he stop all of this now that we have cameras and ****?

Because he doesn't exist.

[Car0llle]

[joey11223]

It would seem logical, after all this time, to send another prophet who could perform physical miracles as Jesus was supposedly able to.

Secularism is on the rise....but I'm pretty sure if a guy came out in a flash of light, starting walking on water, changing objects into other things, touching the blind and restoring sight etc...we'd probably pay close attention to what they preached.

In fact related to this an update scripture could be very useful. One major issue these days is a lot of 21st century issues are not easily answered via ancient texts. You can vaguely interpret, but a new book explaining more biological processes, DNA, genetics etc, would make it more relevant. One assumes God kept it vague and simplistic because that was the knowledge base at the time, now he could explain to us crucial physics theories which we're struggling to solve, answers to which would give the religion obviously credibility.

[_music<3]

(Original post by hippieglitter)
He didn't, but most of the people who God talks to nowadays end up in maximum security psychiatric hospitals.

Well that's hardly true considering praying is seen as a form of 'talking' to God. I'm pretty sure most people who pray aren't destined for the mental home, otherwise they'd be pretty full by now.

[hippieglitter]

(Original post by _music<3)
Well that's hardly true considering praying is seen as a form of 'talking' to God. I'm pretty sure most people who pray aren't destined for the mental home, otherwise they'd be pretty full by now.

Yes but I didn't mention people talking to God, I referred to those that God talks to. Yes many people pray but rarely get a coherent reply from said higher power.

[blueray]

He hasn't. You have just stopped listening.

[Einheri]

Probably because people stopped being so gullible. Now when some crazy guy whose been living in a desert for 40 days starts raving that he's God's messenger people throw him in the loony bin (and rightly so).

[_music<3]

(Original post by hippieglitter)
Yes but I didn't mention people talking to God, I referred to those that God talks to. Yes many people pray but rarely get a coherent reply from said higher power.

's on me I guess then.

[Craig_D]

He had a great system when he would bombard Earth with definite proof that He exists, suddenly stop, and then demand that everyone from that point onwards for the next 2,000 years believe anecdotal evidence written in a book or face an eternity of punishment. It's the fairest way of doing it, right?

[Arteta]

There seems to be a strong correlation with the improvement of science and the lack of miracles, i've no doubt that the priests have an answer for this.

[najinaji]

(Original post by _music<3)
Well that's hardly true considering praying is seen as a form of 'talking' to God. I'm pretty sure most people who pray aren't destined for the mental home, otherwise they'd be pretty full by now.

...I'm inclined to disagree.

[doggyfizzel]

Because conveniently enough every prophet is the last one

Jesus was supposed to be the last prophet, then Muhammed the last one. Its stops a religion superseding yours.

[Annie72]

(Original post by hippieglitter)
He didn't, but most of the people who God talks to nowadays end up in maximum security psychiatric hospitals.

Would + rep but am out of it for today!!.

[Okashira]

Moses once stated this:


"Oh, that all the Lord’s people were prophets and that the Lord would put His Spirit upon them!”



Thanks to Jesus, this day has come.