[DyslexicHearts]

Hello there,
watch this video, yeh? It might make you laugh.
Feedback would be good.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JyVKLffwF9s
Thanks

[toronto353]

Hi,
First of all thank you for posting your video. It can be difficult to seek criticism and so I applaud you on that. I would say that I didn't find it funny per se. There wasn't really anything connecting scene after scene and it became perhaps a little too long as a sketch. It may have worked better being broken down into a series of smaller, more well developed sketches. The main character wasn't really expanded upon and I feel that he was perhaps too over the top that he can't be related to and hence it becomes a little surreal. The humour should perhaps be developed into something a little more mature, while still maintaining its brand of slapstick comedy.

It's a good attempt, but I think there's a lot of work to be done on this to get it up to a high standard of comedy.

I look forward to watching your next video,

toronto353