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Worried about my friend's university chances...

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    (Original post by pyroclastic_blast)
    A lot of universities have 'high' offers like ABB but accept a lot lower, which is likely considering that she got ADDU and they still gave her a place. Thus if she fails to get the grades she could still gain a place.

    On a side note: don't worry about her. Failing could be the best thing for her as while bad in the short term it could motivate her to work harder in future. This is a good age/ point in your life to learn the hard way about the consequences of not working and she could really gain from the experience and become more motivated.
    This. All the people telling you to nag her probably haven't even got to uni yet!
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    (Original post by Chapeau Rouge)
    This. All the people telling you to nag her probably haven't even got to uni yet!
    It could motivate her or destroy her confidence and send her into depression due to the feeling of being useless and boredom.
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    (Original post by 11flon)
    I wouldn't necessarily "confront" her, as that sounds a bit too... well... confrontational

    I don't think I'd even go as far as to tell her to work harder as it's her own life and she knows the grades she needs to achieve in order to get into her first choice uni and how much work she needs to put in to get those grades. However if I were you I'd definitely suggest to her that she should put down an insurance choice - just say it casually and tell her she's not losing anything by putting one down but it's always better to be safe than sorry. The main thing is not to come across like you're patronising/nagging her because she does have the right to make and learn from her own mistakes, but I'm sure she'll understand you're just looking out for her You never know anyway, some people have a habit of downplaying the amount of revision they've done, she might be working harder than you think...
    She had an ACC offer, so I might try some gentle persuasion Sigh, I wish she was one of those "downplay my revision" people, but she just isn't - I know her too well. She considers 30 mins of revision alot :/
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    (Original post by swbp)
    She had an ACC offer, so I might try some gentle persuasion Sigh, I wish she was one of those "downplay my revision" people, but she just isn't - I know her too well. She considers 30 mins of revision alot :/
    Aha! Well, in a way maybe it'd be good for her to realise that she needs to put a bit more effort in if she wants to do well... You're not going to be there at uni to persuade her to work, so if she doesn't learn to motivate herself then there's not much point in her getting the grades due to your advice only to fail when left to her own devices. But yeah if you're able to help her realise that before the exams that'd obviously be better for both of you than her realising after failing xD
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    id just leave her to it. she knows what she needs to achieve to get into uni and being nagged wont make her work harder, could even have the opposite effect.

    also just because she hasnt revised over easter doesnt mean anything. i view holidays as just that - a holiday from work and studying and a chance to have a break, a bit of fun "me time" and spend time with friends and families, and then get back to studying when im back in uni - maybe she feels similarly about it. also people learn differently and revision isnt always that helpful to some people - if i revise a lot it all gets jumbled up in my head and i forget everything, which usually makes it worse as i get frustrated at myself for forgetting it all when i really need it.

    just let her get on with it and work how she works best, it could be she works better when she knows she has a deadline - sort of like working under pressure as it forces you to do it rather than procrastinating as you have "plenty of time left". you never know, she might just surprise you.
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    I'd just leave her to it, she's old enough to know how much work she needs to put in. I don't think many people would appreciate being told to study more by their friends anyway as it comes off as very patronising even though you mean well. If she doesn't put in the work she'll fail, she knows the score by now. If she really wants to go to uni she'll do what a lot of people do, learn from her mistakes and resit the year.
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    (Original post by Besakt)
    It could motivate her or destroy her confidence and send her into depression due to the feeling of being useless and boredom.
    What doesn't kill you makes you stronger...
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    Take a poo on their face, this should do the trick..
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    Calmly/rationally let her know of your concern by explaining why your advice is with her interest in mind. By this I mean highlight how working hard (or at all) is going to be essential to her goal, explaining that she'll lose the opportunity if she doesn't. Don't be confrontational or intrusively interventionist. If she's sensible, she'll see the sense and thank you for it, whether now or later.

    If not, she could get her act together by herself, or she could fail from lack of preparation. Either way, at that point it's beyond anyone else's input. You're doing a favor by letting her know in the first place. Any failure of hers would be a consequence of her short-sighted laziness, and (IMO) deserved.
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    (Original post by Chapeau Rouge)
    What doesn't kill you makes you stronger...
    No it doesn't.
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    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    Well I hope daddy is ****ing loaded because who can afford to spend £40k on a little interest and 3 years of their life?
    Anyone earning less than £21,000, perhaps?
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    (Original post by Besakt)
    No it doesn't.
    Your view on life is rather pessimistic.
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    (Original post by Chapeau Rouge)
    Your view on life is rather pessimistic.
    *Realistic. You don't have to look at the world twice to know why.
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    (Original post by Besakt)
    *Realistic. You don't have to look at the world twice to know why.
    It's hardly a realistic view on life to assume that anyone who doesn't meet their A level grades is sure to slip into a deep depression that they will never recover from...
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    (Original post by TGH1)
    Anyone earning less than £21,000, perhaps?
    (Original post by Besakt)
    Student loans exist and based on the current system she will only have to pay back if she earns enough. It's not about how much you borrow but how much you earn that determines how much you pay back if she gets a job that is not very high paying she may not even pay it back.
    Spending three years of your life on something that interests you and you enjoy is three years well spent in my eyes.
    Well that's a matter of opinion and the price tag shouldn't put anybody off applying to university unless it's for a second degree because of how it is funded and you pay it back.

    I don't want to get into debate about the useful/uselessness of a degree. So I'm just going to leave it at that.

    :facepalm:
    So as soon as you earn more later on in life, just when you need to save for a mortgage and a pension, you have to start paying back your debt. Because that sounds like a great idea!

    Also, you are assuming that the current debt system is not changed and the repayments are not sold off and the t&c are changed. Look at it this way, they changed so the state would pay less, but as it currently stands, new students pay less back than those from 5 years ago. That is the opposite of what they wanted to achieve and I really don't think that MP's are that stupid.
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    (Original post by Chapeau Rouge)
    It's hardly a realistic view on life to assume that anyone who doesn't meet their A level grades is sure to slip into a deep depression that they will never recover from...
    Why is it not. I know people who've failed to get into university and can't get a job and are practically driving themselves insane going out everyday looking for jobs getting rejected and repeating this every single day.
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    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    :facepalm:
    So as soon as you earn more later on in life, just when you need to save for a mortgage and a pension, you have to start paying back your debt. Because that sounds like a great idea!

    Also, you are assuming that the current debt system is not changed and the repayments are not sold off and the t&c are changed. Look at it this way, they changed so the state would pay less, but as it currently stands, new students pay less back than those from 5 years ago. That is the opposite of what they wanted to achieve and I really don't think that MP's are that stupid.
    But what if they become homemakers? Then their partner will earn, whilst they would have potentially had a university education, well, for free

    The anomalies still exist
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    (Original post by Besakt)
    Why is it not. I know people who've failed to get into university and can't get a job and are practically driving themselves insane going out everyday looking for jobs getting rejected and repeating this every single day.
    I also know people who haven't got into university and have got jobs, not driving themselves insane. Sure they aren't exactly the most desirable jobs, call centre work and the like, but my friend working in a call centre with D E E at A level has got themselves a promotion three years later and bought themselves a house. They're already a couple of years ahead of me when I graduate this summer. There was also still the opportunity to retake if they really want to get into university. Back to the fact of the matter, if OP's friend doesn't want to do revision, she knows what she is letting herself in for and if she doesn't get her grades she will have a very valuable learning curve nonetheless. Either way, OP should let her get on with it and not stick their oar in.
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    (Original post by TGH1)
    But what if they become homemakers? Then their partner will earn, whilst they would have potentially had a university education, well, for free

    The anomalies still exist
    If they are that lucky, then fair enough, but how many couples do you know that live off one income? I just think that students are playing Russian roulette nowadays without admitting it.
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    (Original post by Jimbo1234)
    If they are that lucky, then fair enough, but how many couples do you know that live off one income? I just think that students are playing Russian roulette nowadays without admitting it.
    Quite a few. Actually, now that I'm thinking about it, far more than I suspected But that's in part because they've conveniently retired prior to my friends applying for means tested loans and grants...

    I do, to a degree (I apologise for the unintended pun), agree that some of the people I know have gone to university simply to party, and because their friends have. That minority will probably regret doing that in later life. But although it's one thing to tell students they need to get a 'useful' degree, it's another thing to properly inform them of the benefits of doing some subjects over others.

    The advice needs to be better and more widely accessible.

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Updated: April 15, 2012
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