I am not a doorman!

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  1. TheSownRose's Avatar
    • PS Helper
    • TSR Royalty
    • Location: Alone up on the hills and snow
    I am not a doorman!
    So you're walking along at the head of a group of strangers (ie, not people you are friends with*) and you get to a door. Naturally, you go through and it's only polite to hold it for the person behind you.

    Now, here's where it gets annoying: they don't take it and hold it for the person behind them. Instead, they walk through, leaving you holding the door for the next person, and they walk through leaving you holding it for the next person, and so on.

    At what point is it acceptable to stop holding the door and leave it to shut in someone's face? I'm happy to hold it for one person, but that's sort of based upon them either being the only person behind me or taking it from me. I'm not a doorman, I don't have all day to stand there holding the door open for people.

    Or am I just mad for finding this annoying?


    *
    The reason I said not friends is I wouldn't object to holding the door for an entire group that consisted of my friends. I also wouldn't object if the person behind me had their hands full or for some reason couldn't hold the door.
  2. ScarlettDangerfield's Avatar
    • Benevolent Member
    • Location: Thüringen
    • Posts: 715
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    I dunno.. sometimes it happens, I just tend to get over it. Life's too short to get irritated by stuff like that.
  3. Lil2wkd's Avatar
    • Community Assistant
    • Adored and Respected Member
    • Posts: 478
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    Happens to me too, unfortunately manners don't seem to work both ways. A few weeks ago at our local One-Stop Shop I was with a friend who was temporarily on crutches so naturally held the door for them. before they had the chance to walk through the door, people just walked straight on in, at least ten whilst my friend stands there in pain.
  4. TheSownRose's Avatar
    • PS Helper
    • TSR Royalty
    • Location: Alone up on the hills and snow
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    (Original post by ScarlettDangerfield)
    I dunno.. sometimes it happens, I just tend to get over it. Life's too short to get irritated by stuff like that.
    Sometimes, ok. But I've long-thought that I live in a particularly rude area of the country, and this seems to happen on a daily basis. :mad:
  5. JollyJelly's Avatar
    • Exalted and Worshipped Member
    • Location: Wales
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    You don't happen to dress like this do you?

  6. TheSownRose's Avatar
    • PS Helper
    • TSR Royalty
    • Location: Alone up on the hills and snow
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    (Original post by JollyJelly)
    You don't happen to dress like this do you?

    Snazzy at that is, I do not.
  7. TheSownRose's Avatar
    • PS Helper
    • TSR Royalty
    • Location: Alone up on the hills and snow
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    (Original post by Lil2wkd)
    Happens to me too, unfortunately manners don't seem to work both ways. A few weeks ago at our local One-Stop Shop I was with a friend who was temporarily on crutches so naturally held the door for them. before they had the chance to walk through the door, people just walked straight on in, at least ten whilst my friend stands there in pain.
    That's even worse...
  8. Hopple's Avatar
    • TSR Idol
    • Location: London
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    (Original post by TheSownRose)
    So you're walking along at the head of a group of strangers (ie, not people you are friends with*) and you get to a door. Naturally, you go through and it's only polite to hold it for the person behind you.

    Now, here's where it gets annoying: they don't take it and hold it for the person behind them. Instead, they walk through, leaving you holding the door for the next person, and they walk through leaving you holding it for the next person, and so on.

    At what point is it acceptable to stop holding the door and leave it to shut in someone's face? I'm happy to hold it for one person, but that's sort of based upon them either being the only person behind me or taking it from me. I'm not a doorman, I don't have all day to stand there holding the door open for people.

    Or am I just mad for finding this annoying?


    *
    The reason I said not friends is I wouldn't object to holding the door for an entire group that consisted of my friends. I also wouldn't object if the person behind me had their hands full or for some reason couldn't hold the door.
    How are you holding it open? I assume you're turning back and smiling at them or something.

    Just don't stop moving. You hold it open for the next person, but as soon as they reach the door you're moving out of reach so they must hold it.
  9. JessaminePoppy's Avatar
    • Respected Member
    • Posts: 219
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    Hm.Yeah annoying...try making eye contact so's you at least get thanked. If it happens all the time, just open the door for yourself, the person behind you better not be in a group.

    Still a pretty trivial thing. You could try making them pay for the time you spend holding the door
  10. TheSownRose's Avatar
    • PS Helper
    • TSR Royalty
    • Location: Alone up on the hills and snow
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    (Original post by Hopple)
    How are you holding it open? I assume you're turning back and smiling at them or something.

    Just don't stop moving. You hold it open for the next person, but as soon as they reach the door you're moving out of reach so they must hold it.
    I wouldn't say I'm actually stopping, but I'm aware they haven't taken it.
  11. Hearty_Beast's Avatar
    • Benevolent Member
    • Posts: 601
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    Try letting go of the door (and walking on) as they get to you, then they can take the door and keep it open (easier than opening it themselves), and you don't have to hold it for the unlimited swarms of people wanting to pass.

    Then they can do the same... and so on.
  12. Dux_Helvetica's Avatar
    • Adored and Respected Member
    • Posts: 440
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    Just hold the door open, then pause while facing forwards for a few seconds, and if somebody else doesn't grasp the door, tough.
  13. This Honest's Avatar
    • TSR Demigod
    • Location: London | Posts: -1 | Position: TSR babe
    • Warning points: 10
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    Well when I am at the head of a group of strangers, I will open the door, walk forward inside AND still holding it, then I will let go and usually the person behind me will usually hold the door and so forth which means I don't have to stand there holding it for the rest if you know what I mean.
  14. Marlo Stanfield's Avatar
    • Exalted Member
    • Posts: 296
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    You're doing it wrong.

    You're supposed to just maintain contact with the door so it's not closing, then as the person behind you gets a sizeable way through, let go of the door and they'll take up the baton of door-opening.

    Cannot believe I just wrote that out.
  15. Hopple's Avatar
    • TSR Idol
    • Location: London
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    (Original post by TheSownRose)
    I wouldn't say I'm actually stopping, but I'm aware they haven't taken it.
    There's a difference between letting a door swing closed in someone's face and letting it go when they can hold it open themselves. If they are able to comfortably reach enough of the door for it not to close, then you can let go

    You must be stopping at some point if a whole horde of people can get by though
  16. sarahthegemini's Avatar
    • TSR Demigod
    • Location: Northamptonshire
    • Posts: 6,244
    • Warning points: 10
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    It's hilarious the amount of people on this thread that have explained how to properly hold a door open for a stranger :teehee:
    Last edited by sarahthegemini; 18-04-2012 at 15:45.
  17. Baula's Avatar
    • Exalted and Worshipped Member
    • Location: Sheffield
    • Posts: 1,122
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    (Original post by TheSownRose)
    So you're walking along at the head of a group of strangers (ie, not people you are friends with*) and you get to a door. Naturally, you go through and it's only polite to hold it for the person behind you.

    Now, here's where it gets annoying: they don't take it and hold it for the person behind them. Instead, they walk through, leaving you holding the door for the next person, and they walk through leaving you holding it for the next person, and so on.

    At what point is it acceptable to stop holding the door and leave it to shut in someone's face? I'm happy to hold it for one person, but that's sort of based upon them either being the only person behind me or taking it from me. I'm not a doorman, I don't have all day to stand there holding the door open for people.

    Or am I just mad for finding this annoying?


    *
    The reason I said not friends is I wouldn't object to holding the door for an entire group that consisted of my friends. I also wouldn't object if the person behind me had their hands full or for some reason couldn't hold the door.
    lol this reminds me of a tutor at uni. He held the door open but we just thought he was being friendly rather than just holding it for one person. After about 4 girls went through he said to the guy "I'm just going to close the door now because you look like oyu can take it" haha He was epic xD

    On a serious note, I would hold it for one and then go after that one person unless the person behind them is elderly, disabled, a child or carrying something
  18. Steezy's Avatar
    • Vengeful, Imperial Overlord of The Student Room
    • Location: London
    • Posts: 4,170
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    Just don't use your hands. When you get to a door, walk slowly into it & push it open with your hands by your side, then roll inwards so that not only do you walk in like a boss, you also don't use your hands and thereofre CANNOT hold the door open for anyone else.
  19. I<3LAMP's Avatar
    • TSR Idol
    • Location: London
    • Posts: 7,939
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    As I walk through (forwards) I hold onto it for a sec or so if I know someone is behind me waiting to go in, I let go and proceed.

    If I'm walking out of a shop and someone wants to walk in at the same time they inevitably lose. If I've gone through already I'll hold it briefly (like passing on a baton during raleigh I guess) but my bf will let me through, hold onto the door and stand there like a lemon for all sorts of ignorant tossers to walk through who don't even say thank you.

    I end up dragging his silly ass through the door as he's far too nice for London. I think London is evil it makes everyone hard faced and ungrateful and so I don't have much patience for that kinda thing anymore.

    However on holiday OUTSIDE LONDON I'll happy hold a door open to help a buggie through or an elderly person because I am pretty sure they wont shove me or ram their wheels into me and actually say thank you.

    I'll end my rant now.
  20. sil3nt_cha0s's Avatar
    • TSR Legend
    Re: I am not a doorman!
    (Original post by TheSownRose)
    So you're walking along at the head of a group of strangers (ie, not people you are friends with*) and you get to a door. Naturally, you go through and it's only polite to hold it for the person behind you.

    Now, here's where it gets annoying: they don't take it and hold it for the person behind them. Instead, they walk through, leaving you holding the door for the next person, and they walk through leaving you holding it for the next person, and so on.

    At what point is it acceptable to stop holding the door and leave it to shut in someone's face? I'm happy to hold it for one person, but that's sort of based upon them either being the only person behind me or taking it from me. I'm not a doorman, I don't have all day to stand there holding the door open for people.

    Or am I just mad for finding this annoying?


    *
    The reason I said not friends is I wouldn't object to holding the door for an entire group that consisted of my friends. I also wouldn't object if the person behind me had their hands full or for some reason couldn't hold the door.
    You're right - you're not a doorman, you're a doorwoman.
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