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I think I'm losing my faith in God

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    I would really like to keep this post anonymous, please.

    I could write loads but I'll try keep it short.

    I was raised as a Muslim. But I'd always had trouble being a practicing Muslim. I'd rarely ever pray, I did go to an Islamic school on weekends but I stopped about half a year ago. Since then I've never felt more distanced from my faith. I'd always been a theist and I thought I was acting this way because I was being lazy or I just wasn't very religious. But sometimes I will just stop and try think about why I really act like this.

    It was only 2 nights ago while I was lying in bed thinking about it that I burst into tears, realising that I might actually be unsure about God's existence. This next part will sound a little stupid but whenever I really thought about God or Islam it felt like He was there. But that night I didn't, it felt like something was slipping from my mind. When I tried to have that feeling again I just couldn't and I suddenly felt very disturbed and alone. I felt upset also because despite what many people think, I believe Islam is a beautiful religion and it fustrates me how many people twist it and turn it into something ugly. I thought why would God allow people to take his Holy Book and use it to do horrible things?

    I thought about talking about this to a close friend of mine but I changed my mind; I have trouble talking about things which upset me, I rarely do. I thought it might be easier to post anonymously, and it is. I'm not really sure whast I'm looking for. Advice maybe, comfort? Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

    Thanks for reading.

    (Sorry if this is in the wrong section)
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    You know, I went through exactly the same thing. Not about the Islamic God or the Christian God or the Hindu Gods, just... God.

    The idea of God gave me the idea of reassurance that the world had it's place, that something was definite in the universe. I knew that I didn't understand the universe, but God gave the idea that SOMEBODY understood the universe. Somebody knew how it made sense and by knowing about that deity I knew how it made sense.

    But then ideas began to slip. It was a thing of beginning to understand the science of the universe, that there are rules and laws and that humanity isn't morally strung to any one of them. That the universe still made sense even without a God. That made me scared. I felt lonely, thinking that nobody in this universe knew everything, that somebody wasn't there twiddling how it all played out.

    But then it struck me (the lightning you know, for beginning to turn atheist), I'M ignorant. EVERYBODY is ignorant. Ignorance isn't bad, it's allowing yourself to specialise. We can't learn everything. When I figured that I could allow myself to be a little ignorant of everything (as we can't learn about everything in the universe in our short lifetimes) that it was okay not to know how the universe 'makes sense'. I'd belittled myself to understand a little bit more.

    When I'd accepted that I could really accept how amazing the universe really is. You know the chances of having all the lottery numbers? NOTHING compared to the likelihood of the universe working out as it did, but it did. In infinite time there is infinite chance for something to happen.

    "We are the universe experiencing itself "


    The idea of God might drift, but the idea that we are part of some infinite magical lottery of life can add an edge to an experience that we may never have had.
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    Not to worry, OP. Lots of people (myself included) go through periods - either short or long - of doubting their faith. Also of not feeling God in the way they used to.

    In Catholicism, there's even a name for this type of period that people go through (that is, if they come through the other side still being in God): the dark night of the soul.

    You're definitely not alone out there :hugs:
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    I sort of went through the same thing but then ended up losing my faith completely. But it was difficult. It felt extremely weird thinking I could live life without God. So, you aren't alone in that feeling. Not at all, no one can blame you for that.

    I don't want to try an influence you either way because the decision is only something that can be made by you. No one should force you into believing (mental independence is never a bad thing) nor should anyone bully you into thinking that god doesn't exist. So it might take a while for you to make up your mind (if you ever do).

    But I'd like to say, you don't need to feel 'alone' because you think there isn't a god, you can still be important. If anything, I see more value in everyone's life without a deity controlling everything. It feels better to me.

    I realise a lot of this post may seem pointless (sorry ) but i'm just offering a different perspective. Don't feel bad about thinking for yourself or anything of the sort. If a god does exist, why would it frown upon independent thought? It'd be like a mother being angry at it's child for trying to walk or talk.
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    Good. You're using your rational mind. You're asking questions. These are all positive things that religion will not allow. Don't be afraid if you stray from the path of your parents or family etc. You are the only one that should control what you believe.

    As Richard Dawkins says, 'there is no such thing as a Christian child or a Muslim child" - only Christian or Muslim parents.
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    I am so sorry to hear that this is having such an affect on your mental well-being. Faith and Hope are very good coping strategies that a lot people find useful when they are finding life stressful, you can have these without believing in god or practicing a religion. The feelings of reassurance that you felt when you were looking to God came from you and your own self-esteem. I would suggest talking to someone about how you are feeling, whilst i'm sure writing this post came to some benefit for you, the impression i get is that this feeling is eating away at you and that isn't healthy.

    I can't helping thinking by what you've written that you don't really to turn your back on your religion. Maybe because you've distanced yourself, you don't feel as apart of it and that's what has led you to feel that way. At the end of the day dont do whats best for someone else, do whats best for you.

    Remember that you're not alone, you have your friends, family and while it might not be the wisest thing to declare out of the blue that your an atheist. I'm sure they love and care about you.

    I hope this helps and you get the support you need.
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    It's human to question something that can't be proven. Infact it would be quite ignorant if you didn't consider other possibilities. I myself have explored the 4 main religions and I have come to the conclusion that there is no god.

    Good luck with your searching.
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    It is difficult and many might say that this is gods way of testing you?

    I personally am still very unsure of my beliefs and although raised Christian I never really didn't believe. Its always been there, but I've always been unsure.

    I think its such a difficult thing to understand or try to explain. The best you can do is read as much as you can. On lots of faiths not just your own, I have read (albeit translations) the Qur'an, bible, torah and books on hinduism. But also the God Delusion and other science based opinions. I am still no closer to knowing the answer. But I am more settled with my life.

    I would say do what you can but don't expect the journey to end. It doesn't.
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    Congratulations. You're on the road to recovery.
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    I know you feel upset now but if you decide you are an atheist then you won't actually feel sad for that long. It's like the feeling you get when you leave secondary school. You're sad for a bit but then you realise that actually you have so much ahead of you and you are still going to keep in contact with the people who matter anyway. Your life doesn't need to be and will not to be sad because you have lost faith in God. You will just go through a small amount of grief. Really, all your losing is a coping mechanism and some tradition. Go join some clubs and develop some hobbies that make your life exciting. Because you're only on this earth for a microscopic amount of time. And when you die, that's it (since you're thinking about atheism). So cherish the time you have.

    It took me a lot of back and forth ruminating thoughts to realise that there is no god. So you will probably change your mind several times.

    Hope you deal with things ok
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    I prefer to post this anonymously but was unsuccessful doing so. anyway here's my story.
    I had been bottling up my problems since A-levels (before i went to uk university), problems within family, with guys, and with God, in Kuala Lumpur and in uk. and because of a person i met in uk (nothing wrong with him actually) i felt nobody can be trusted and was confused who is God and scared that I would be going to hell. I felt that I couldnt differentiate between reality and what I perceived. I lost touch with reality and couldn't do anything for myself, didnt even feel like eating. I felt that every option led to hopelessness and there's no way out, even if i die. But i felt guilty and thought i should kill myself. but everytime i felt hopeless its Him who gave me hope, so im 100% sure Jesus is Lord, because of too many miracles. it was christmas period (dec10) and whenever i saw the lights on the christmas tree in hospital, they reminded me not to lose hope. yes, believing in jesus we wont be hopeless. i was diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. i stayed in hospital for a month and showed good progress (had fun joining the activities on the ward). im now back in malaysia, studying and working, enjoying life and family company. on antipsychotic and antidepressant, seeing the doctor every few months.
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    ok here's a few tips i hope can help:

    pray the 5 prayers if you don't already do
    try reading the Quran at least once a day
    keep making little prayers to God asking Him for guidance and strength

    whatever you do, don't lose your faith. i wish you the very best of luck
    #3

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I would really like to keep this post anonymous, please.

    I could write loads but I'll try keep it short.

    I was raised as a Muslim. But I'd always had trouble being a practicing Muslim. I'd rarely ever pray, I did go to an Islamic school on weekends but I stopped about half a year ago. Since then I've never felt more distanced from my faith. I'd always been a theist and I thought I was acting this way because I was being lazy or I just wasn't very religious. But sometimes I will just stop and try think about why I really act like this.

    It was only 2 nights ago while I was lying in bed thinking about it that I burst into tears, realising that I might actually be unsure about God's existence. This next part will sound a little stupid but whenever I really thought about God or Islam it felt like He was there. But that night I didn't, it felt like something was slipping from my mind. When I tried to have that feeling again I just couldn't and I suddenly felt very disturbed and alone. I felt upset also because despite what many people think, I believe Islam is a beautiful religion and it fustrates me how many people twist it and turn it into something ugly. I thought why would God allow people to take his Holy Book and use it to do horrible things?

    I thought about talking about this to a close friend of mine but I changed my mind; I have trouble talking about things which upset me, I rarely do. I thought it might be easier to post anonymously, and it is. I'm not really sure whast I'm looking for. Advice maybe, comfort? Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

    Thanks for reading.

    (Sorry if this is in the wrong section)
    Hi,
    I just read your post and thought of myself. I too have been brought up to be a Muslim. My family is fairly religious - they lack one main thing which is five time prayer, but my parents definitely try. I, on the other hand, seem to have gone downhill in that department ever since I went to uni. I too, went to an islamic school - not just on the weekend, but my actual secondary school was a private islamic school. In the evenings, I went to mosque everyday until I was 14. So i guess you could say I've definitely been brought up to be a practicing Muslim.
    As you know, to be a Muslim, it's not just about believing in Allah or Muhammad (s), but loads of other stuff - like the afterlife, and angels etc. And for me, my biggest problem is believing in the afterlife. I find it hard to get it into my head (or to imagine) how it will be. It is one of the biggest things I struggle with, right up to today. As for five time prayer, I can assure you, I have barely prayed since I moved away for uni - I'm not proud of this at ALL.. and I wish I could change - but I know what I'm lacking - imaan: faith.
    My school taught me loads of things - the theory behind Islam, shariah, our history, everything about prayer etc. but one of the most important things I learned there was you should QUESTION when you have doubt - and continue to search until you find the answer that satisfies you. Don't be afraid to talk to other Muslims - if they are TRULY a good person, and non-judgemental, that is the only thing that will help you. If they tell you to piss off, or that you're not a Muslim or whatever, forget them.
    Everyone questions their faith, especially if you are one of those people who don't want to be a blind follower. But equally well, I would advise you to give it a chance - sometimes the things we're taught from childhood are just what we memorise but never truly understand. Question it, learn from it - even if it takes you a very long time. Talk to scholars: especially those who have studied the hadeeth and quran in lots of detail. There's no rush.
    All the best with everything! I will make duaa for you insha'Allah, please pray for me too
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    How can you have faith in something that can't be proven?
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I would really like to keep this post anonymous, please.

    I could write loads but I'll try keep it short.

    I was raised as a Muslim. But I'd always had trouble being a practicing Muslim. I'd rarely ever pray, I did go to an Islamic school on weekends but I stopped about half a year ago. Since then I've never felt more distanced from my faith. I'd always been a theist and I thought I was acting this way because I was being lazy or I just wasn't very religious. But sometimes I will just stop and try think about why I really act like this.

    It was only 2 nights ago while I was lying in bed thinking about it that I burst into tears, realising that I might actually be unsure about God's existence. This next part will sound a little stupid but whenever I really thought about God or Islam it felt like He was there. But that night I didn't, it felt like something was slipping from my mind. When I tried to have that feeling again I just couldn't and I suddenly felt very disturbed and alone. I felt upset also because despite what many people think, I believe Islam is a beautiful religion and it fustrates me how many people twist it and turn it into something ugly. I thought why would God allow people to take his Holy Book and use it to do horrible things?

    I thought about talking about this to a close friend of mine but I changed my mind; I have trouble talking about things which upset me, I rarely do. I thought it might be easier to post anonymously, and it is. I'm not really sure whast I'm looking for. Advice maybe, comfort? Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

    Thanks for reading.

    (Sorry if this is in the wrong section)
    I have been in your exact situation this past year. I am a Muslim, and I'm currently in my first year of uni. Moving here, so far away from home, has been really difficult. I had already sort of been questioning my faith during my last two years of 6th form, but because I never really made an Muslim friends at uni it made it harder for me to connect with my faith, especially since I was getting worse and worse at being a practicing Muslim (as in making sure I prayed, read the Quran etc). It got to the point where I said I didn't believe in God at all, and I made big mistakes which I would give anything to erase from my past, but those mistakes pushed me back into Islam and not only reinstated my faith, but made it 1000 times stronger.

    I don't know how old you are, but if you're a student (TSR-duh!) then you're probably going through a very normal and healthy period of questioning. You have doubts because you were born into Islam, you never made the choice to be Muslim, and now that you're at the age that you rely less and less on your parents this is becoming very apparent. Perhaps that's why you feel like you always could feel Allah there but now you don't. Please don't panic like I did and make mistakes you can't take back until you are absolutely certain and proud of your beliefs.

    If you have any questions or would like to speak in confidence about your situation I would be more than happy to reply to your messages. I wish someone had been there for me, I know how much I wished I could speak to a Muslim who wouldn't judge me or try to change me. Good luck!
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    Don't feel guilty about thinking about the issue, and don't allow yourself to be bullied into a state of belief/disbelief.
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    I suppose it is rather an odd thing OP. For me, my descent from orthodox monotheism was rather gradual. I began reading, comparing and reasoning certain ideas, concepts or parts of my religion and others and found that at least I could only accept it in a very metaphorical or esoteric way. Then there were major parts that I began to doubt and didn't seem to stand strong to any sort of objective reasoning. Eventually, I became sort of pantheistic and now I'm really just Agnostic, leaning towards weak atheism some days and then back to monotheism or pantheism or deism on others.

    I think because it was a gradual process, and that I was consciously active in it (by reading and reasoning), it wasn't such a shock. I became familiar with ideas of a less and less "personal god" and so when I came to realise that its existence is just as likely as a number of other things, it wasn't such a shock to me. For you though, I can see that having done nothing for a long time and having forgotten about your religion only to realise how unsure you are, would be quite an awful experience. Your entire world must feel as though it is crumbling at your very toes.

    I can't tell you much, then again I doubt very many people could, but I am quite certain of one thing. Your decision now will have a polarizing effect on your beliefs for the greater part of your life (if not the remainder). Having come to a stark realisation like you have, you will either lose all faith or gain it anew. I would suggest that you try to do so most rationally and go talk to Imams, maybe even other religious people (priests, rabbi's etc) and talk with some atheists and agnostics. Discuss, if possible, with some of your more trustable friends, and most importantly find in yourself what you truly believe and what brings you the most comfort. Because that is all there really is, if it comforts you and even in the end if it doesn't turn out true, well at least you would have believed and practised what made you happy and what you reasoned to be true, not what you have been forced or have decided rashly.
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    Welcome to the light.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I would really like to keep this post anonymous, please.

    I could write loads but I'll try keep it short.

    I was raised as a Muslim. But I'd always had trouble being a practicing Muslim. I'd rarely ever pray, I did go to an Islamic school on weekends but I stopped about half a year ago. Since then I've never felt more distanced from my faith. I'd always been a theist and I thought I was acting this way because I was being lazy or I just wasn't very religious. But sometimes I will just stop and try think about why I really act like this.

    It was only 2 nights ago while I was lying in bed thinking about it that I burst into tears, realising that I might actually be unsure about God's existence. This next part will sound a little stupid but whenever I really thought about God or Islam it felt like He was there. But that night I didn't, it felt like something was slipping from my mind. When I tried to have that feeling again I just couldn't and I suddenly felt very disturbed and alone. I felt upset also because despite what many people think, I believe Islam is a beautiful religion and it fustrates me how many people twist it and turn it into something ugly. I thought why would God allow people to take his Holy Book and use it to do horrible things?

    I thought about talking about this to a close friend of mine but I changed my mind; I have trouble talking about things which upset me, I rarely do. I thought it might be easier to post anonymously, and it is. I'm not really sure whast I'm looking for. Advice maybe, comfort? Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

    Thanks for reading.

    (Sorry if this is in the wrong section)
    my first thought to the title would be "GET OFF TSR before you get random people telling you what 'side' to be on"

    i used to be hindu when i was younger, while my dad wasnt very religious, my mum was. generally, in terms of being raised, with religion, it was pretty relaxed... my mum kept making me take part in rituals (something about a coconut for example) every now and again but thats pretty much it. i believed in god in the general sense, not in terms of a religion, just in terms of his existance... though back then, i concentrated more on whats before me, than contemplate god existence

    over time, as i went through secondary and sixth form, looking at the news more, becoming more opinionated, my views gradually changed from being a very (very) relaxed theist, to an agnostic atheist


    in terms of how youre thinking, id suggest, walking off, going to whatever place you feel peaceful e.g. a park field, and calmly contemplate how you feel about religion and god.... maybe bring a book and pen and note down stuff...

    DO NOT let your friends or family affect your decisions.... you want to be what you want because thats YOUR choice...not theirs

    whatever happens to you, despite what others say, always remember:

    there is NOTHING wrong with being a tolerant theist
    there is NOTHING wrong with being a tolerant atheist (you or other people may not think this, but there really isnt anything wrong)
    there is NOTHING wrong with being a tolerant agnostic
    etc....

    note how i used the word tolerant over and over....
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I would really like to keep this post anonymous, please.

    I could write loads but I'll try keep it short.

    I was raised as a Muslim. But I'd always had trouble being a practicing Muslim. I'd rarely ever pray, I did go to an Islamic school on weekends but I stopped about half a year ago. Since then I've never felt more distanced from my faith. I'd always been a theist and I thought I was acting this way because I was being lazy or I just wasn't very religious. But sometimes I will just stop and try think about why I really act like this.

    It was only 2 nights ago while I was lying in bed thinking about it that I burst into tears, realising that I might actually be unsure about God's existence. This next part will sound a little stupid but whenever I really thought about God or Islam it felt like He was there. But that night I didn't, it felt like something was slipping from my mind. When I tried to have that feeling again I just couldn't and I suddenly felt very disturbed and alone. I felt upset also because despite what many people think, I believe Islam is a beautiful religion and it fustrates me how many people twist it and turn it into something ugly. I thought why would God allow people to take his Holy Book and use it to do horrible things?

    I thought about talking about this to a close friend of mine but I changed my mind; I have trouble talking about things which upset me, I rarely do. I thought it might be easier to post anonymously, and it is. I'm not really sure whast I'm looking for. Advice maybe, comfort? Has anyone else been in a similar situation?

    Thanks for reading.

    (Sorry if this is in the wrong section)
    I am a Muslim, and I will advise you that you try to learn more about the religion, this will help you clear your doubts and bring you you closer to God. And you will learn more about Islam, which will increase your faith on God.

    Also if you are having any questions that you are finding it difficult to have answers for, then you should ask some proper Muslim scholar.

    Also feel free to pm, I may be able to help you.

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