[EmmaJane_]

(Original post by SciFiBoy)
hopefully yeah, im hoping they give me sleeping meds, be nice to have regularish sleep for a few days as im going to visit friends next week! I guess, though I don't hold out much hope tbh. lol true

that's good

Hopefully they will, I can't even imagine going without sleep!
I tend to use sleep as a form of escapism, so I just go into hibernation when things get bad! Take care

[SciFiRory]

(Original post by EmmaJane_)
Hopefully they will, I can't even imagine going without sleep!
I tend to use sleep as a form of escapism, so I just go into hibernation when things get bad! Take care

I tend to struggle to get to sleep and end up sleeping in the day a lot atm not great for my mood really!

fair enough, sleep is good

[avhhs]

(Original post by SciFiBoy)
after 30 hours without sleep, I just crashed out for 12 hours, feel awful though

sigh, also got fobbed off by the girl I like yesterday, she made a lame excuse not to meet up, even after she had suggested it initially, I no doubt said something wrong when we were talking or something, I should really just stop kidding myself, clearly im just one of those people who is meant to die alone.

Well done for the sleep

You're not meant to die alone. I'm sure you'll.find someone . Maybe she was just really busy?

Spoiler:

Show

Well, it is obviously me that is meant to die alone though

(Original post by ViceVersa)
Police found my brother!

Excellent :hugs.

.,.,.,.,.

As for me, my exams are over

[CherryCherryBoomBoom]

Sometimes I wonder if I'm just kidding myself about having depression - after all, the professionals are pretty much doing nothing to help me, despite me going to them for help a few times. I'm probably just a **** person and trying to find something else to excuse that

[SciFiRory]

(Original post by avhhs)
Well done for the sleep

You're not meant to die alone. I'm sure you'll.find someone . Maybe she was just really busy?

Spoiler:

Show

Well, it is obviously me that is meant to die alone though

.,.,.,.,.

As for me, my exams are over

thanks, no idea how nice it was to finally sleep!

thanks, idk though, I have 0 luck with these things I doubt she is busy tbh, she already knew I was coming cause I told her, heck she was the one who originally suggested we meet up, then suddenly she makes other plans...

Spoiler:

Show

im sure that's not true if there's is to be hope for me than there will be hope for anyone

glad to hear your exams are all done

(Original post by CherryCherryBoomBoom)
Sometimes I wonder if I'm just kidding myself about having depression - after all, the professionals are pretty much doing nothing to help me, despite me going to them for help a few times. I'm probably just a **** person and trying to find something else to excuse that

don't be silly, you are a good person, you're just ill, depression sucks, but it's not your fault, im sure you will find professionals who will help eventually too!

[KTCI]

I'm going to counselling to finally deal with everything that's happened to me. Abuse, depression, eating disorders, drugs, the end of a long term relationship, the whole shebang. But it just makes me feel worse, realise how bad I feel. When I'm around people, I'm happy, and I can pretend that things are okay, but when I really look at myself, I see all the things that are wrong. And I don't want to, I just want to have the superficial happiness and believe that it's true. I don't want to know that I should logically end my current relationship, that I am a depressed person and that at the end of the year I'll be alone and sad.

The thing is that I can see the person that I could be. I'm funny, I can be confident, assertive, I have quirky interests, my own sense of style. I like myself when I'm happy. I want to be that all the time. ARGH.

Also hi everyone, my name is Haley. I just needed to get this out.

[bytail]

(Original post by ViceVersa)
Police found my brother!

Thank goodness they found him! That's great news

[Sabertooth]

(Original post by CherryCherryBoomBoom)
Sometimes I wonder if I'm just kidding myself about having depression - after all, the professionals are pretty much doing nothing to help me, despite me going to them for help a few times. I'm probably just a **** person and trying to find something else to excuse that

I feel the same. The professionals have basically written me off completely, so if they're not seeing me obviously there's nothing wrong I'm just an inferior person.

Although that does then beg the question....why am I taking all this medication?

[SciFiRory]

"hey doctor, how's the patient?"

"okay, he's gonna make it"

"he? you came in with a she!?"

"one little mistake..."

a bit of humour to liven all our days

much love and kudos if people know where this is from, also congrats cause it makes you almost as big a geek as me

[bytail]

(Original post by KTCI)
I'm going to counselling to finally deal with everything that's happened to me. Abuse, depression, eating disorders, drugs, the end of a long term relationship, the whole shebang. But it just makes me feel worse, realise how bad I feel. When I'm around people, I'm happy, and I can pretend that things are okay, but when I really look at myself, I see all the things that are wrong. And I don't want to, I just want to have the superficial happiness and believe that it's true. I don't want to know that I should logically end my current relationship, that I am a depressed person and that at the end of the year I'll be alone and sad.

The thing is that I can see the person that I could be. I'm funny, I can be confident, assertive, I have quirky interests, my own sense of style. I like myself when I'm happy. I want to be that all the time. ARGH.

Also hi everyone, my name is Haley. I just needed to get this out.

That sounds pretty heavy, I'm sorry you've had to go through all of that I know that admitting you have a problem is horrible, but the way I see it, you can't pretend everything is okay forever. Better to get it all out in the open and over and done with now, rather than waiting for it all to explode out of you in X years time.

Being single doesn't mean you'll be sad, and who knows, you might be in another relationship by then anyway! Try to focus on getting yourself back to where you want to be before you worry about anything else. It's no fun, but it'll be worth it in the end

[d123]

(Original post by ViceVersa)
Police found my brother!

I'm happy for you!

(Original post by SciFiBoy)
after 30 hours without sleep, I just crashed out for 12 hours, feel awful though

sigh, also got fobbed off by the girl I like yesterday, she made a lame excuse not to meet up, even after she had suggested it initially, I no doubt said something wrong when we were talking or something, I should really just stop kidding myself, clearly im just one of those people who is meant to die alone.

Maybe she's legitimately busy? I always jump to the 'they don't want to see me, they're just being polite' conclusion, and it's often not true. I'm sure you've done nothing wrong.

[SciFiRory]

(Original post by d123)
Maybe she's legitimately busy? I always jump to the 'they don't want to see me, they're just being polite' conclusion, and it's often not true. I'm sure you've done nothing wrong.

maybe, but I doubt it somehow, either I said something wrong or they just don't like me is much much more likely imo, especially judging by previous experience.

[Noodlzzz]

For those who are bored, need distracting or cheering up, check out some of these videos: http://improveverywhere.com

Hours of entertainment

[bytail]

(Original post by Noodlzzz)
For those who are bored, need distracting or cheering up, check out some of these videos: http://improveverywhere.com

Hours of entertainment

Omg, I love these videos! Thanks for reminding me, not watched any for ages

[rmhumphries]

(Original post by SciFiBoy)
after 30 hours without sleep, I just crashed out for 12 hours, feel awful though

sigh, also got fobbed off by the girl I like yesterday, she made a lame excuse not to meet up, even after she had suggested it initially, I no doubt said something wrong when we were talking or something, I should really just stop kidding myself, clearly im just one of those people who is meant to die alone.

Are you sure she was just making an excuse? If she suggested it, it may be something did actually come up, see what happens without fearing the worst.

(Original post by ViceVersa)
Police found my brother!

Good to hear

[SciFiRory]

(Original post by rmhumphries)
Are you sure she was just making an excuse? If she suggested it, it may be something did actually come up, see what happens without fearing the worst.

idk, is going home to visit family really more important than meeting up with someone? she says she goes home a fair amount anyway so seems kinda odd that she would have to be there on those specific days...I still think she just fobbed me off tbh, probably cause she realised she doesn't want to see me or like I said maybe I said something wrong. sorry, just feel really negative about stuff atm.

[rmhumphries]

(Original post by SciFiBoy)
idk, is going home to visit family really more important than meeting up with someone? she says she goes home a fair amount anyway so seems kinda odd that she would have to be there on those specific days...I still think she just fobbed me off tbh, probably cause she realised she doesn't want to see me or like I said maybe I said something wrong. sorry, just feel really negative about stuff atm.

Could be tickets was prebooked, and she forgot the exact date until now (with advance train tickets you can't change them, so she would have to lose £20+ if she didn't go), could be some kind of family event such as birthday, or even just an event such a small gathering of family which she has already said she will attend and doesn't want to let people down, and so on.

[SciFiRory]

(Original post by rmhumphries)
Could be tickets was prebooked, and she forgot the exact date until now (with advance train tickets you can't change them, so she would have to lose £20+ if she didn't go), could be some kind of family event such as birthday, or even just an event such a small gathering of family which she has already said she will attend and doesn't want to let people down, and so on.

her family live like a short train journey away in the same county...could be I suppose, but seems odd she didn't mention if it was? idk. all I know is that I was really looking forward to seeing her and now that probably isn't happening

[rmhumphries]

(Original post by SciFiBoy)
her family live like a short train journey away in the same county...could be I suppose, but seems odd she didn't mention if it was? idk. all I know is that I was really looking forward to seeing her and now that probably isn't happening

First may not apply then, doesn't mean the second doesn't. Depending on how big event it is would depend on if she mentioned it, if it is just a gathering of family then I wouldn't expect anything more than going home to see family, but would hold true to what I said. See if she wants to do something some other time, and get suspicious if it the same thing happens again - once is not enough to tell anything.

[SciFiRory]

(Original post by rmhumphries)
First may not apply then, doesn't mean the second doesn't. Depending on how big event it is would depend on if she mentioned it, if it is just a gathering of family then I wouldn't expect anything more than going home to see family, but would hold true to what I said. See if she wants to do something some other time, and get suspicious if it the same thing happens again - once is not enough to tell anything.

yeah I guess, idk. problem is, it's pretty difficult for me to travel up to Colchester from here, and only really able to do it as could afford a hotel atm and my mum is giving me a lift up and im staying at a friends in London to break up the journey back. next time I know I can be up there isn't till October really when Uni starts up again -_- but I suppose the stuff you say is true, thanks!

I hope things are good for you atm?