[superwolf]

(Original post by SciFiBoy)
seems so anti-biotic's should help, but will leave me kinda worn out which is a pain!



yeah, trying to, managed to avoid the booze for a couple of days, have some tonight but none tomorrow that way I figure am okay for trip to Uni and then a break after that if I can manage it. if I give up drinking then I think we can be sure the apocalypse has begun

also - cause you ain't been around here for a bit and the thread ain't the same without you

Hmm, maybe your GP should prescribe you some amphetamines to wake you up a bit.

Yeah, sticking to just a few days sounds good. If we do have an apocalypse can I request the kind with fire and explosions (meteorites are also good, but have kinda been done before), rather than floods and tidal waves?

Aww shucks. Although I note you're careful not to say whether the thread's better or worse off without me.

(Original post by Wheek)
The dried fruit is the only reason I eat fruit and fiber and even then I tend to pick out the flakes and just eat the fruit!

Thanks for the offer. I'm not sure what to talk about really, my braincells have shut down a little bit over the long weekend, the ones that have not shut down I am slowly pickling with some bulmers pear and I am going for the bury head in sand option a little on the stuff getting to me.

Fair enough if your brain goes into shut down for a while (I've done the same before too ). And as a short-term solution I can't fault the cider too. And if your brain changes its mind and wants a thought-splurge, you just need to start talking.

(Original post by Sultana)
Oh my head hurts so much How do you get to the point where you are 'fine' around people AND fine by yourself? This is not much of a life atm

***
Also, hi! I posted on here a bit but went into hospital and haven't been around since, I have some posts I want to reply to when I'm feeling a bit better. Hope everyone is alright.

Hey, hope hospital wasn't too awful.

I think in order to reach that coveted state of fineness you basically need to stop giving a **** about anything.

(Original post by Sabertooth)
Thanks for the offer but so far I've only forgotten a couple of nights. Mine don't have naughty bits, I'm far too innocent for that. The underlying theme is mostly about me having to save the world from nefarious governments so I'd put money on her diagnosing me with narcissistic personality disorder. Well, either that or the old I want to have sex with my mum thing.




Ah yes, the NHS.

Oh they did that with my essay too, don't worry about it I'm sure they'll approve it for you, I really can't see them refusing. So you'd do it in the summer or next year?

I'm glad to hear you've been getting more sleep.




Haven't got to that bit yet, I need a long train journey to listen to the rest.....will probably do it on the way to the summer meet.



The best one imo so far is when I was king of Saudi Arabia.



As much as I'd like to agree with you, I think you're wrong. By all measures (and by that I mean solely by BMI) I was in the overweight range and the swimwear test in front of a mirror also ended badly. Both measures are now in the "normal range" but I don't think that's good enough, I don't want to be normal I want to be better than normal. I'm still a fat **** until I can fit in shorts from 2 summer's ago, so still got quite some way to go. I'm not sure when you get a different idea from, I mean when I met you and rmhumphries in Manchester I ate two dinners.....



I called them up last week and told my CPN how angry I am about the whole dream bull****. Apparently I'm seeing the "short term intervention team" (er....since 2008 is short term?) and they only have one moron psychiatrist.

Funny, I always thought you'd end up destroying the world (after becoming Grand Dictator then going insane of course), rather than saving it.

In August I expect. Had a major panic earlier today when I got sent an email saying I have to submit my mitigating circumstances evidence by Monday, but managed to get a hold of my psychiatrist and he promises (again ) to have the letter ready by then and I can go and collect it. Otherwise things might turn ugly...

There you go proving my point for me yet again. In the same paragraph you've both admitted that you're now in the normal weight range, and claimed that you're a fat ****. You can't be both. You're always changing the rules and standards so that you're never satisfied with yourself, and you never cut yourself any slack. Besides, dinner is a great meal, and why wouldn't you want to eat it twice?

Who the **** are the short term intervention team? Are you sure they even have a proper qualification between them, and aren't just a bunch of hippies and faith healers out to convert you to their despicable ways? Maybe you could tape record your next appointment and then forward it to your MP and see if your case will get taken up as a victim of the NHS.

(Original post by thatsthebadger93)
Well if we’re gonna get technical about it, I don’t have it either since they’ve changed my diagnosis. We can start an 'almost BPD club'



That’s not a bad idea, though I suspect that their minimum will be waaay higher than mine.
Thing is I don’t think I’m eating all that badly and I’m generally really careful to eat enough before going out running. I’ve been out since and been fine so I think I just mistimed the meal I had before I went out.
I only run 3 or 4 times a week and I really don’t want to cut it down anymore as it’s one of my only ‘healthy’ coping mechanisms

I think I may have moved one step closer though - in retrospect telling my psychiatrist that I 'don't believe in monogamy' possibly wasn't the best idea.

Compromise! Not only will you hopefully eat a better amount, but it may teach you bargaining skills which will prove fruitful in later life.

Could you go running with someone then? Or at least make sure your route means you'll be somewhere safe and moderately populated in case it happens again.

(Original post by Anonymous)
Hey guys just putting a general question out here. Ignore if you wish.

I'm beginning to think I've got some pretty crippling depression as a consequence of chronic sleep deprivation. I mean people have insomnia and get by, but my life is unliveable right now! I can't think at all, I can't remember what I did a few hours ago (unless it's exceptionally out of the norm), my mental energy is in tatters! Physically I'm not so bad, I can go to the gym and kind of enjoy it. But getting up and out and doing stuff feels horrible. I am also now incredible anxious. This is a bit of the bolt out of the blue for me, I was very happy go lucky before. Does this sound like depression in ones of its more severe forms? Am I alone?

Thank You for your time.

My depression recently took a serious turn for the worse too, which I blame for the most part on sleep problems (exams probably didn't help either though) caused by new medication. I was getting barely any sleep each night, and what little I did get was full of nightmares and waking up in cold sweats. So yeah, I think there can be a strong correlation between sleep problems and depressive moods. Fortunately for me, stopping the original medication and going temporarily on a couple of different sleeping meds has meant my sleep's improved a fair bit (no nightmares and I sleep more, but still very interrupted), and my mood's definitely risen as a result of it. If you haven't already then I'd consult with your GP or psychiatrist and explain how much you think this lack of sleep is affecting you, and see what they're willing to do about it. Even though it's possible they'll only be able to offer short-term solutions (since sleeping pills are generally pretty addictive), it's still worth asking, and they might be able to give you some useful tips on sleep hygiene and stuff, if you don't know about it already.

(Original post by Noodlzzz)
How are your periods? (Because PMT is a well known cause of psychosis)

Perhaps they thought your psychosis was anorexic?

So...

How are your periods?

(Original post by Noodlzzz)
PS. I hope you replied cider

I did not. *hangs head in shame*

(Original post by Sabertooth)
Oh I think I can win this one:

Spoiler:

Show

So tell me about your dreams.

Sorry, still exceptionally pissed off about the whole thing. If that one doesn't count it's probably the conversations I had about the new york dolls and Dostoyevsky's crime and punishment with one psychiatrist in particular.

The dreams one is a decent contender, but it seems more like a persistent and recurrent theme than a single question. And conversations aren't single questions either. Think harder!

(Original post by Sultana)
Its good your mum is supportive And lots of people don't like the idea of medication, if your psych thinks its a good idea it might be wise to try it. You can always come off it if it doesn't agree with you. Are you going by yourself or is your mum going with you?

My day.. found a house for next year which is a relief and its with lovely people as well Spent the afternoon with friends, yes me being social! Also waited for an hour for an appointment with my care coordinator only for her not to bother t o turn up so that was cool.

I'm finding it easier now to keep my mask up when I'm with people; lots of people think I'm back to my old self, but when I'm by myself I just crumble

I've hopefully got next year's accommodation sorted out too.

In the past I've felt bad finding that I could act normal around other people, but then fall apart when alone, but looking back later on I realised it was actually one of the earlier stages of my getting better - you get more energy to act better, and you care more about making other people think you're ok, and then later on as you progress you do actually start feeling better yourself.

(Original post by rmhumphries)
This is clearly very important to my mental health...

That's a truly impressive level of irrelevancy. A very strong contender indeed. Have a trophy.

(Original post by d123)
And I was doing so well...

(Original post by Wheek)
Finding it very hard to get out of bed this morning. My poorly guinea pig was put to sleep yesterday morning and my first thought on waking up this morning was I wonder how he is today? Its become a habit for me to race out of bed each morning to check on him and see how he is doing that it was automatic to get up to go check on him, except he is already gone and that thought hit me like a tonne of bricks. As a result the tears started again and now I don't want to leave my duvet behind.

Sorry to hear he's gone.

(Original post by Anonymous)
Anyone else in here an emotionally unstable personality disorder??

Halfway there - I've got emotionally unstable personality traits.

(Original post by thatsthebadger93)
So my psychotherapy appointment was cancelled yesterday and now she's away on leave so won't even be able to rearrange it for another two weeks. Also realized today that it's been live 5 weeks since I last spoke to my care coordinator, keep thinking that maybe I should let him now how I'm doing but don't really see the point, he's clearly not that worried so why should I be

Also as far a irrelevant questions from a psych go: "Do H&M have a sale on?"
I hadn't even been to H&M!

The NHS really doesn't do itself much favours trying to get you to be open to treatment and everything does it? Still, for your sake I reckon you should get in touch with your care coordinator and get anything that needs doing sorted - and also give him a proper telling off for abandoning you.

Ok that has got to be another winner. Your trophy (statuette of a psychiatrist wearing a dunce hat ) will be dispatched to you shortly.

(Original post by bytail)
Nearly got sectioned today! Had to assure my GP I won't do anything over the weekend to avoid him putting me "somewhere safe". Got another appointment on Monday so I guess I'll have to see how I feel then.

Hope you do manage to get through the weekend ok. With regards to hospital, I agree that if it does come to it, going voluntarily is definitely preferable to being sectioned, for the reasons others have stated and also because a section can be damaging when you're applying for certain things and need a CRB check, like some jobs, visa applications etc. I've been in hospital myself and, while obviously the prospect is scary, it can definitely be a helpful measure when you're at crisis point.

(Original post by Anonymous)
To anybody who has experience of inpatient care for their mental illnesses;

Does anybody know whether a young person (i.e. 18-19 year olds) would be placed on a ward with much older people (e.g. 40+ year olds)?

And also, if I was taken in because the CRHT team believed I wasn't safe if left at home (but I agreed to the hospitalization) what sort of tome length would I have to stay in hospital for?

I was about 22 and got put on a ward with people of various ages - there was one boy who can't have been more than 18, and an old guy in a wheelchair - people were mostly middle aged, but generally friendly enough to other patients of any age.

I was in hospital for two months, but for that time I was so apathetic I wasn't actually massively bothered by being in hospital and didn't bother hiding my suicidal feelings, so I never asked to be discharged (I went in voluntarily). I imagine that if you went in voluntarily and made good progress (i.e. were safe to be let out) then you'd only be in for a few days or a week or so.

(Original post by Noodlzzz)
So random question: I'm doing badminton and yoga next week as part of EIS and was wondering if it would be ok to wear short sleeves? e.g. show off scars. There isn't that many and I'm comfortable in myself to wear what I want, but I don't want to trigger any of the other people or be questioned about it by staff or others. Opinions?

If it's gonna be a regular thing, how about wearing long sleeves the first week, and asking a member of staff/other participants whether they mind for the next time.

(Original post by Cinnie)
You know what. Sometimes it's nice to just admit to yourself and everyone else that you FEEL LIKE COMPLETE ****

Sorry that you're feeling so bad. Least you've got a whole thread to admit it to though.

[bytail]

(Original post by littleshambles)
barnet, enfield and haringey mental health team have displayed truly IMMENSE levels of prejudice and incompetence towards me today and i would strongly advise anyone who uses mental health services to avoid moving anywhere covered by these people if possible. i would have made a formal complaint about them already but the man on the end who i told i wanted to complain didn't know what the complaints procedure was and failed to call me back when he said he would so i still don't know how to complain

What happened? Hope you're okay.

(Original post by superwolf)
Hope you do manage to get through the weekend ok. With regards to hospital, I agree that if it does come to it, going voluntarily is definitely preferable to being sectioned, for the reasons others have stated and also because a section can be damaging when you're applying for certain things and need a CRB check, like some jobs, visa applications etc. I've been in hospital myself and, while obviously the prospect is scary, it can definitely be a helpful measure when you're at crisis point.

I was about 22 and got put on a ward with people of various ages - there was one boy who can't have been more than 18, and an old guy in a wheelchair - people were mostly middle aged, but generally friendly enough to other patients of any age.

I was in hospital for two months, but for that time I was so apathetic I wasn't actually massively bothered by being in hospital and didn't bother hiding my suicidal feelings, so I never asked to be discharged (I went in voluntarily). I imagine that if you went in voluntarily and made good progress (i.e. were safe to be let out) then you'd only be in for a few days or a week or so.

Yeah, thanks for the advice, I think I might have to ask if I can be admitted on Monday, I just can't carry on like this. Not a nice way for my parents to find out, but I'm almost beyond caring

[rmhumphries]

I need to learn to deal with things by myself. Told a friend, who has her own mental health issues, just how I have been feeling, but she can't deal with it now - and I don't know if I can talk about it easily another time, it takes a lot of effort to push through my barriers.

I deal with things by myself, I be ok, yes?

[superwolf]

(Original post by rmhumphries)
I need to learn to deal with things by myself. Told a friend, who has her own mental health issues, just how I have been feeling, but she can't deal with it now - and I don't know if I can talk about it easily another time, it takes a lot of effort to push through my barriers.

I deal with things by myself, I be ok, yes?

You could try writing it down for her to read later?

[rmhumphries]

(Original post by superwolf)
You could try writing it down for her to read later?

I don't know, right not, it is more instinctive - based on what is said at the moment and so-on.

And beyond all that, even if I did produce a brilliant account, tomorrow to protect myself, and her, I would most likely not want to show her.

[Sultana]

(Original post by superwolf)
Hey, hope hospital wasn't too awful.

I think in order to reach that coveted state of fineness you basically need to stop giving a **** about anything.

but, but if I stop giving a crap then whats the point

(Original post by superwolf)
I've hopefully got next year's accommodation sorted out too.

In the past I've felt bad finding that I could act normal around other people, but then fall apart when alone, but looking back later on I realised it was actually one of the earlier stages of my getting better - you get more energy to act better, and you care more about making other people think you're ok, and then later on as you progress you do actually start feeling better yourself.

to finding accomodation!

Thank you, this is what I'm trying to cling on to, I just can't afford to not be ok right now. Hopefully this happens sooner rather than later!

How are you?

[d123]

Not sure if the fact that I suddenly feel kind of unwell is a side effect of taking the first dose of citalopram or whether it's entirely in my head and my general anxiety related to taking the drugs (pharmacophobia is not a useful fear to have!) is making me think that I'm reacting badly to them.

[headunderwater]

I've decided I'm not taking my olanzapine anymore. The side effects are too bad and I've asked about lowering the dosage but I always get the same "that's not a good idea" response. It might **** my head up in terms of my psychosis but I can't deal with olanzapine anymore. Does anybody have any experiences with completely stopping AP medication? Am I making a big mistake?

[The_Lonely_Goatherd]

(Original post by d123)
Not sure if the fact that I suddenly feel kind of unwell is a side effect of taking the first dose of citalopram or whether it's entirely in my head and my general anxiety related to taking the drugs (pharmacophobia is not a useful fear to have!) is making me think that I'm reacting badly to them.

Could be either, tbh. Hang on in there, hun!

(Original post by headunderwater)
I've decided I'm not taking my olanzapine anymore. The side effects are too bad and I've asked about lowering the dosage but I always get the same "that's not a good idea" response. It might **** my head up in terms of my psychosis but I can't deal with olanzapine anymore. Does anybody have any experiences with completely stopping AP medication? Am I making a big mistake?

I think you're supposed to come off it slowly, rather than stop taking it altogether. Best thing is to talk to your psychiatrist again, as annoying as that might be

[headunderwater]

(Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
I think you're supposed to come off it slowly, rather than stop taking it altogether. Best thing is to talk to your psychiatrist again, as annoying as that might be

I won't see my consultant until at least another 3 weeks (I only see her every two months) and she's the only person with the capacity to take me off it. I've told her every single time I've seen her that I don't want to be on olanzapine but she says if I stopped taking it it's likely I'd have another psychotic breakdown. I'm scared I was actually thinking of throwing all my medication away because I don't want to have a life dictated by medication... Argh.

Thanks for your reply.

[d123]

(Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)


Could be either, tbh. Hang on in there, hun!




I think you're supposed to come off it slowly, rather than stop taking it altogether. Best thing is to talk to your psychiatrist again, as annoying as that might be

Just hoping the side effects aren't too bad tomorrow as I'm starting work, I'd hate to be feeling sick and dizzy on my first day.

[sunfowers01]

I hate how my emotions are all over the place. Today is not a good y. I'm listening to songs and realising I'm there for everyone else but when I need someone there is rarely anyone I can go to

[headunderwater]

(Original post by sunfowers01)
I hate how my emotions are all over the place. Today is not a good y. I'm listening to songs and realising I'm there for everyone else but when I need someone there is rarely anyone I can go to

I know it's not the same but you have all of us

[Sabertooth]

(Original post by headunderwater)
I've decided I'm not taking my olanzapine anymore. The side effects are too bad and I've asked about lowering the dosage but I always get the same "that's not a good idea" response. It might **** my head up in terms of my psychosis but I can't deal with olanzapine anymore. Does anybody have any experiences with completely stopping AP medication? Am I making a big mistake?

I did this last year with risperidone when my psychiatrist refused to take me off it and I hated the side effects. I got some pretty nasty withdrawal symptoms, in particular I remember severe insomnia after I stopped it cold turkey. Things very quickly deteriorated, not helped by the lack of sleep, and I ended up going through with a suicide attempt and being admitted to hospital. Things were really not good at all.

I'd definitely recommend proceeding carefully. If I was you, I wouldn't throw out all your pills because the consequences of not taking them could be pretty bad. However, I understand that the side effects can make you want to stop taking it, so what you could do is tell the psychiatrist that you are going to stop it and it's up to him whether you get something else/withdraw slowly with his help or whether you simply stop cold turkey. Sometimes threats can work (as long as you're not in a condition to be sectioned, then it's a bad idea). Furthermore, if you throw out all the pills and then do decide to bring yourself off the olanzapine then you can't take one when/if the side effects become too severe to handle and APs can have some pretty bad effects when you stop them.

[The_Lonely_Goatherd]

(Original post by headunderwater)
I won't see my consultant until at least another 3 weeks (I only see her every two months) and she's the only person with the capacity to take me off it. I've told her every single time I've seen her that I don't want to be on olanzapine but she says if I stopped taking it it's likely I'd have another psychotic breakdown. I'm scared I was actually thinking of throwing all my medication away because I don't want to have a life dictated by medication... Argh.

Thanks for your reply.

A life dictated by medication does suck, definitely. I guess it's about weighing up the alternatives and deciding which gives you the better quality of life in the long run?

Does the olanzapine actually help with your psychotic symptoms at the moment?

(Original post by d123)
Just hoping the side effects aren't too bad tomorrow as I'm starting work, I'd hate to be feeling sick and dizzy on my first day.

Hopefully you'll be fine. Think positive!

(Original post by sunfowers01)
I hate how my emotions are all over the place. Today is not a good y. I'm listening to songs and realising I'm there for everyone else but when I need someone there is rarely anyone I can go to

(Original post by headunderwater)
I know it's not the same but you have all of us

[bytail]

(Original post by headunderwater)
I've decided I'm not taking my olanzapine anymore. The side effects are too bad and I've asked about lowering the dosage but I always get the same "that's not a good idea" response. It might **** my head up in terms of my psychosis but I can't deal with olanzapine anymore. Does anybody have any experiences with completely stopping AP medication? Am I making a big mistake?

I wouldn't go cold turkey, the side effects might get worse than they are now I hope you can get it changed next time you see your consultant, sounds like things are really difficult for you at the moment

(Original post by d123)
Not sure if the fact that I suddenly feel kind of unwell is a side effect of taking the first dose of citalopram or whether it's entirely in my head and my general anxiety related to taking the drugs (pharmacophobia is not a useful fear to have!) is making me think that I'm reacting badly to them.

Could be the citalopram, I noticed side-effects fairly quickly after I started taking it. They should pass after about a week though

[headunderwater]

(Original post by Sabertooth)
I did this last year with risperidone when my psychiatrist refused to take me off it and I hated the side effects. I got some pretty nasty withdrawal symptoms, in particular I remember severe insomnia after I stopped it cold turkey. Things very quickly deteriorated, not helped by the lack of sleep, and I ended up going through with a suicide attempt and being admitted to hospital. Things were really not good at all.

I'd definitely recommend proceeding carefully. If I was you, I wouldn't throw out all your pills because the consequences of not taking them could be pretty bad. However, I understand that the side effects can make you want to stop taking it, so what you could do is tell the psychiatrist that you are going to stop it and it's up to him whether you get something else/withdraw slowly with his help or whether you simply stop cold turkey. Sometimes threats can work (as long as you're not in a condition to be sectioned, then it's a bad idea). Furthermore, if you throw out all the pills and then do decide to bring yourself off the olanzapine then you can't take one when/if the side effects become too severe to handle and APs can have some pretty bad effects when you stop them.

Thanks for your reply.

One of the conditions of me leaving hospital last time was that I would continue being compliant with medication. I don't know what to do. I know I would likely get no sleep at all without the olanzapine and the voices would become worse, but I need to balance that with the horrible side effects. I think next time I see her I'm going to ask her to change to Quetiapine. I was on that for a bit and didn't get any real side effects and helped a little bit. Thing is, the olanzapine keeps a lid on my psychosis and helps me sleep which are the only good points.

By the way, I was the 'eye rolling' poster. Did you find anything that helped reset your eyes?

[headunderwater]

(Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)

Does the olanzapine actually help with your psychotic symptoms at the moment?

Yes it does. Before I was put on olanzaine my psychosis was out of control

[The_Lonely_Goatherd]

(Original post by headunderwater)
Yes it does. Before I was put on olanzaine my psychosis was out of control

Just read your post above: see if you can hold out til you can talk to your psychiatrist about changing to quetiapine, or something similar.

Is there no way to move your next appointment forward, or get an emergency appointment?

[Natalya]

My point being, this thread does not cover GID, ADD, ADHD, Autism, etc,

Hear Hear
...Still is anxiety (long lasting) covered in this?