[VickyDoodle]

Hi guys.. wow,I feel a little odd posting about this. >.<
My doc seems to think that my constant headache for the last 16 months is to do with my mental health, and I don't know why. She prescribed me beta-blockers "to help my anxiety" which to be perfectly honest I never knew I had, but they never changed anything - though reading up on anxiety it makes sense, but dates back to way before my headache. I feel like people are always watching me and laughing at me and so always feel quite scared,especially when I'm alone. As of late this pain is just making me feel worse and worse as no-one's taking me seriously, the doctor thinks I'm mad and making it all up as nothing seems to be helping and it's just driving me down and making me feel like I did a few years past. Since my bunny died I've got no-one to talk to as I feel awkward talking to friends and he was the only thing that kept me stable, since his death I haven't been able to cry and have self-harmed a few times, which I haven't done in two years. I'm at a loss of what to do,really.

[bytail]

(Original post by superwolf)
Distraction technique: making facetious post reports.

(Original post by VickyDoodle)
Hi guys.. wow,I feel a little odd posting about this. >.<
My doc seems to think that my constant headache for the last 16 months is to do with my mental health, and I don't know why. She prescribed me beta-blockers "to help my anxiety" which to be perfectly honest I never knew I had, but they never changed anything - though reading up on anxiety it makes sense, but dates back to way before my headache. I feel like people are always watching me and laughing at me and so always feel quite scared,especially when I'm alone. As of late this pain is just making me feel worse and worse as no-one's taking me seriously, the doctor thinks I'm mad and making it all up as nothing seems to be helping and it's just driving me down and making me feel like I did a few years past. Since my bunny died I've got no-one to talk to as I feel awkward talking to friends and he was the only thing that kept me stable, since his death I haven't been able to cry and have self-harmed a few times, which I haven't done in two years. I'm at a loss of what to do,really.

Have you told your doctor about your fears that people are watching/laughing at you? It sounds pretty stressful If you don't feel like your doctor is taking you seriously then perhaps you could try a different GP? Sorry to hear about your bunny, the death of a pet is always difficult Perhaps getting a new rabbit would give you something to focus on, someone to confide in, and help ease the pain somewhat?

[avhhs]

Currently on a high after 3 amazing dreams

This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my HTC Wildfire S

[SciFiRory]

sigh, stupid sleep pattern need to stay awake to sign for something but incredibly tired and now feeling ****ty about being tired...

had other things I wanted to do today but no way I am gonna be awake enough for them now

at least managed to shower this morning though, seems to have used up all my energy for the week even though

[Noodlzzz]

(Original post by SciFiRory)
sigh, stupid sleep pattern need to stay awake to sign for something but incredibly tired and now feeling ****ty about being tired...

had other things I wanted to do today but no way I am gonna be awake enough for them now

at least managed to shower this morning though, seems to have used up all my energy for the week even though

You could always ignore it. Then they'll try to redeliver tomorrow/drop it at local post depot?

[SciFiRory]

(Original post by Noodlzzz)
You could always ignore it. Then they'll try to redeliver tomorrow/drop it at local post depot?

nah, they tried to deliver it yesterday and I had fallen asleep but I called them and they said would deliver it again today either late morning or lunchtime, god knows what time that means, if they don't deliver by the time my mum finishes work at 2pm then I will sleep then, hopefully they deliver sooner so I can sleep!

got my mum to pick up new headphones I need as well so one less worry, still need to go to a cashpoint before Sunday really though but that means being awake enough to leave the house for something other than the camping trip, motivation for which is hard...

so tempted to be bad and have a coffee or two...

thanks for replying btw I hope you are doing okay?

[Nut.]

Today I resolve to watch Enemy at the Gates right through until the end.

Stupid Film4 always putting it on at 9pm so I fall asleep before the conclusion.

[Deyesy]

(Original post by Nut.)
Today I resolve to watch Enemy at the Gates right through until the end.

Stupid Film4 always putting it on at 9pm so I fall asleep before the conclusion.

SUCH a good film. Jude Law is amazinggg in it.

[bullettheory]

(Original post by Sultana)
One good thing about being in hospital is watching peoples reactions when you tell them!

How are you managing at the moment?

Indeed! It's so much fun when you have someone who goes on about how psychiatric hospitals are full of "crazy psychotic murderers who have no friends and are social outcasts" (someone seriously said that), and then you just casually mention that you were in one, and their face is a picture. Even better if you are in a group of people

I'm really struggling, had a terrible night last night for many reasons, but mainly because the quetiapine increase made me feel sick and I have a MASSIVE phobia of being sick, and I had a panic attack and no one could calm me down and that. And shadows were really bad... How are you doing ATM?



This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

[bullettheory]

(Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)





Hmm, it does seem like the shadows are quite overpowering for you at times I'm so sorry this is happening to you: you seem like such a lovely person Are you religious at all? It must be quite worrying, feeling that you're possessed I'm Catholic and one of my uber-Catholic friends wanted me to have an exorcism. He even found an exorcist who would do it and said I could write to him and get an appointment, and that he'd come with me! I was like He meant well though

I think sometimes it can be so hard for parents to see their child in a state that they can do nothing about and so they crack jokes about it? Like how some people have inappropriate reactions, e.g. laughing, at funerals? Must be really hard for you though.

Have a big hug

Yeah they are quite strong at the moment, it's been a bit better this morning but they are always worse at night so we will see. I try to be a nice person, so I guess it's good that someone thinks that, so thanks I'm not religious really, I'm not an atheist though. I think there is a god and all that, I'm just not sure where my beliefs lie, if that makes sense... Wow, that's quite intense... Not sure how I would react to that myself!

Yeah I mean usually I can handle his jokes but I was too upset at the time to go with it. I don't know. Thank you how are you?


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

[The_Lonely_Goatherd]

(Original post by bullettheory)
Yeah they are quite strong at the moment, it's been a bit better this morning but they are always worse at night so we will see. I try to be a nice person, so I guess it's good that someone thinks that, so thanks I'm not religious really, I'm not an atheist though. I think there is a god and all that, I'm just not sure where my beliefs lie, if that makes sense... Wow, that's quite intense... Not sure how I would react to that myself!

Yeah I mean usually I can handle his jokes but I was too upset at the time to go with it. I don't know. Thank you how are you?


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

That does make sense, what you said about your beliefs Tbh if it hadn't been someone I am very fond of, I would have absolutely *******ed them over trying to send me to an exorcist

I'm OK thanks. Very tired though. Must try and do some work this afternoon though

[bytail]

Hm. So I'm still waiting on the crisis team, apparently they'll be in touch at the beginning of next week My GP is going away for a few weeks so has said he doesn't want to change my meds, but that another doctor might be able to (seeing someone on Tuesday). Saw the school therapist today and talked about my childhood which was good. Told her I still feel like saying "**** it" and giving up; she said she's only had 1 client in 20-odd years who successfully went through with it, and that she thinks I need to give myself a chance to be helped because I don't have the intent to die so much as the lack of will to live, if that makes sense. Just really hoping I can get my meds changed soon, because I know that if I get to the point where I attempt again I'll take a lot more pills, and keep pushing it until I'm successful

So I just have to try and make it through the weekend without hurting myself!! Might be going to see the new spiderman film tonight which will be a nice distraction, and the therapist gave me a book on depression which looks pretty interesting

[kiss_me_now9]

So today I have not only showered in an empty house, but I have also walked over to the shopping complex, posted some items and spent two and a half hours in a charity shop helping out all on my todd Feels great to not be afraid. I'm even considering walking to town tomorrow by myself to meet my BF for dinner in his hour break between his two different jobs

Figured out that if I put a podcast on my iPod, someone talking about something interesting but not too exciting, it calms me down a bit and I can just listen and walk

[bytail]

(Original post by kiss_me_now9)
So today I have not only showered in an empty house, but I have also walked over to the shopping complex, posted some items and spent two and a half hours in a charity shop helping out all on my todd Feels great to not be afraid. I'm even considering walking to town tomorrow by myself to meet my BF for dinner in his hour break between his two different jobs

Figured out that if I put a podcast on my iPod, someone talking about something interesting but not too exciting, it calms me down a bit and I can just listen and walk

Eeee I'm so happy for you, that is seriously brilliant! Really hope things continue to run smoothly for you What kind of podcasts are you listening to?

[The_Lonely_Goatherd]

Just had a seriously brief, formal email from my father figure (my chaplain from Oxford), responding to a reference request. I didn't expect anything more from him, given that he's not really supposed to reply to emails from me, but it's made me feel quite sad

[bytail]

(Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
Just had a seriously brief, formal email from my father figure (my chaplain from Oxford), responding to a reference request. I didn't expect anything more from him, given that he's not really supposed to reply to emails from me, but it's made me feel quite sad

[The_Lonely_Goatherd]

(Original post by bytail)

Thanks Sounds like things are really rough for you atm. I hope you know that we're here for you on this thread

[d123]

My mum is obviously worried about me. I feel bad for upsetting her. I'm acting like I'm absolutely fine so she doesn't keep me at home after this week. But she's clearly worrying

[The_Lonely_Goatherd]

(Original post by d123)
My mum is obviously worried about me. I feel bad for upsetting her. I'm acting like I'm absolutely fine so she doesn't keep me at home after this week. But she's clearly worrying

I can't remember if we've had this conversation before (so forgive me if I'm repeating myself) but mothers are ALWAYS going to worry about their kids, whether things are wrong or 100% right. It's built into their natures, I think. So don't feel bad about worrying her!

The best thing to do is maintain an open and honest dialogue, as far as you are comfortable doing so. That way she knows that you know that you can turn to her if you want to

[d123]

(Original post by The_Lonely_Goatherd)
I can't remember if we've had this conversation before (so forgive me if I'm repeating myself) but mothers are ALWAYS going to worry about their kids, whether things are wrong or 100% right. It's built into their natures, I think. So don't feel bad about worrying her!

The best thing to do is maintain an open and honest dialogue, as far as you are comfortable doing so. That way she knows that you know that you can turn to her if you want to

Yeah, I guess it's natural she's worrying.

It's quite funny though, we were out for lunch and my brother told me to shut up and he got shouted at for being mean to me :P I think she thinks I need protecting because I'm fragile. Clearly in a good place today because I just found it funny.